PBP Commentary

Coming up we have a super heavyweight MMA rules bout between Turd McPherson (ranked 5016 p4p, 1519 weight class) and Harry Kane (ranked 175 p4p, 33 weight class). Both fighters look fresh as a daisy as they make their way towards the cage.

McPherson
vs
Kane

225 cm
39
288
18 - 12 - 0

195 cm
28
245
6 - 4 - 0

Great wrestler
World class boxer
Very quick

Olympic wrestler
World class MT
Good gas tank

Urban Fighter

Ladies and gentlemen. This fight is 3 rounds, in the super heavyweight division.
Introducing the fighter to my left, fighting out of the red corner.
With a record of 18 - 12 - 0, fighting out of New York, Turd McPherson!
And introducing the fighter to my right, fighting out of the blue corner.
With a record of 6 - 4 - 0, fighting out of Las Vegas, Harry Kane!
The judges for this bout are Cecil Peabody, George Francis and Wesley Smith.

The bell rings for round one and we are underway!
McPherson fails with a takedown attempt.
McPherson misses with a takedown
and Kane counters with a quick right hand to the jaw.
Kane misses with a body shot.
McPherson tries for a takedown but Kane circles away easily
and Kane counters with a nice uppercut.
That's three failed takedown attempts in the round for Turd McPherson. That's going to take a lot out of him.
McPherson shoots in for a double leg but Kane sprawls well. That's going to sap some energy.
Turd McPherson seems to be the more aggressive standup fighter in this bout.
McPherson ducks under a wild hook from Kane.
A really sloppy takedown attempt there from McPherson.
McPherson looks to throw a body kick
and Kane counters with a good right hand that lands right on the jaw.
We've had a slow start to the round here - hopefully the action picks up.
McPherson tries to drive through with a takedown attempt but Kane defends well and McPherson ends up having to push Kane into the cage where they will battle it out in the clinch.

Kane breaks the clinch and we're back to striking at distance.
McPherson shoots in with a takedown attempt and he has Kane pinned against the cage. Kane gets the underhooks and manages to circle away.
McPherson misses with a leg kick
and Kane makes him pay by landing a thudding low kick.

That's one minute gone in the round.
McPherson dives in for a single leg takedown but Kane sprawls and the fighters end up clinched against the cage.
Kane has McPherson pushed against the cage.
McPherson tries for a takedown. No joy.
Kane prevents a takedown attempt there.
McPherson wants a takedown.
McPherson is breathing heavily.
Kane gets through McPherson's defenses to land a nice punch to the side of the head.
A short uppercut from Kane.
Kane cracks McPherson with a nice body shot.

Kane manages to break the clinch.
Kane lands a nice looking body shot.
McPherson has been talking about how he's improved his wrestling in the run up to the fight so let's see if that's enough to sway the balance.
Kane chopping away at his opponent's legs.
Nice uppercut lands for Kane. That snapped McPherson's head back.
Kane scores with a sloppy punch to the body. Not much technique there but it did the business.
Kane scores with a spinning back kick!
Fantastic stuff here - a very entertaining period of action, which has drawn cheers from the crowd.
Kane lands a nice leg kick that just misses McPherson's sensitive parts.
McPherson walks forward and throws out a flicking leg kick. Kane checks it nicely though, as he moves to the side.
Kane moves into range and lands a nice leg kick.
We've been informed that Kane has been sparring a lot of Muay Thai in the buildup to this fight so let's see if that has an impact on the result.

That's two minutes gone in the round.
Kane lands with a thumping leg kick.
Kane digs a good body shot into McPherson's ribs.
McPherson misses with a takedown
and Kane counters with a slapping leg kick.
Kane ducks low and lands a nice hook to the body of his opponent.
McPherson stumbles momentarily as he takes a strong leg kick from Kane.
McPherson dives in for a single leg takedown but Kane sprawls and the fighters end up clinched against the cage.
A left hand lands to the body for Kane.
Kane taking a break, stalling in the clinch.
Still in the clinch, Kane scores with a nice short uppercut.
The pace really dropping off here, momentarily.
Kane scores with a nice hook to the head.
McPherson really does look like a pencil wearing a pair of gloves. Let's hope he has a gameplan to suit that ridiculous body shape.
Nice body punch from Kane.
Kane is working McPherson over against the cage.
A hook to the body from Kane.
Kane lands a left hand.
Kane lands with a short shot to the head.

That's three minutes gone in the round.

Kane manages to break the clinch.
McPherson shoots in looking for a takedown but Kane manages to keep the fight standing, pushing McPherson's face into the canvas for good measure before circling away.
Kane scores with a hook to the body. McPherson takes a step back and tries to catch his breath.
McPherson shoots in but doesn't get the takedown
and Kane counters with a stiff right hand.
Kane lands a leg kick that knocks McPherson off balance momentarily.
McPherson shoots in for a takedown - he's clinched up with Kane but Kane pushes him off and we're back to square one.
Kane lands a head shot.
Kane looks to throw the jab but McPherson is out of range.
McPherson shoots in looking for a takedown. Kane tries to sprawl out of it but McPherson keeps driving through. The fighters are pinned against the cage. Kane manages to get underhooks and after a bit of a struggle, circles away and we're back to standing.
Kane bobs and weaves and throws out a fast jab that snaps McPherson's head backwards.

That's four minutes gone in the round.
McPherson on the receiving end of a decent leg kick there by Kane. Kane obviously looking to wear him down.
Kane takes a body punch but keeps moving.
McPherson misses with a takedown attempt - Kane sprawls well and throws a nice strike on the way out which just misses.
Wooooo! Give it up for these two warriors! They are putting on a show!
Nice jab there from Kane.
Kane cracks McPherson with a hook to the jaw. Both fighters smile at eachother and high-five before getting back down to business.

McPherson is rocked!
Kane walks forward and throws a big overhand right! McPherson drops to the floor like a sack of potatoes! Kane swarms on him with more punches until the referee wrestles him away from McPherson's unconscious body! Wow, that was brutal!

Ladies and gentlemen, after 4:30 of round 1, we have a winner by way of TKO (Strikes). Harry Kane!
A less than humble Harry Kane misjudged his post fight interview somewhat and came across a little too arrogant whilst trying to hype up his own abilities.