PBP Commentary

Coming up we have a featherweight MMA rules bout between Ameri Can (ranked 22105 p4p, 2128 weight class) and Louis C K (ranked 413 p4p, 207 weight class). Chooooooooon! I think Can might be my favorite fighter, now he's come out to For Heavy Metal we will die!. C K has chosen Who let the dogs out as his entrance music. Louis C K struggled to make weight for this fight. He only made it down to 147.5lbs at the first attempt and had to take the additional two hours to make the official bout weight. Let's see how much it's taken out of him. Rumors backstage are that the fighters have been paid to keep it standing but we know that would never happen in MMA!

Can
vs
C K

173 cm
44
151
25 - 20 - 1

183 cm
41
158
23 - 21 - 1

Good wrestling
Excellent boxer
Granite chin

Good wrestler
Decent boxing
Solid chin

Ladies and gentlemen. This fight is 3 rounds, in the featherweight division.
Introducing the fighter to my left, fighting out of the red corner.
With a record of 25 - 20 - 1, fighting out of Montreal, Ameri Can!
And introducing the fighter to my right, fighting out of the blue corner.
With a record of 23 - 21 - 1, fighting out of Helsinki, Louis C K!
The judges for this bout are Stewart Dunkirk, Tiny Johnson and George Francis.

The bell rings for round one and we are underway!
Can ducks down and throws a hook to the body but C K moves away.
C K looks like he wants to counter punch here.
Can throws a body shot but no joy.
It seemed like C K was going to counter with the hook but didn't fully commit to it.
Can misses with an attempted mid kick.
Can fakes and then throws a beautiful body shot. C K looks a bit winded and takes a step backwards to take a breath.
Can throws a nice hook to the body that draws an oooh from the crowd.
A big right from Can misses.
C K keeping a good distance there, avoiding the body shot.
We've had a slow start to the round here - hopefully the action picks up.
Can throws a hook but C K avoids it easily.
A slapping body kick lands there for Can.
A cross from Can lands.

That's one minute gone in the round.
Can misses with a jab and misses with a cross straight after too.
C K ducks under a wild hook from Can.
C K looked like he wanted to counter with a punch but didn't throw it.
Can misses the shot to the body.
And an attempted straight right on the counter from C K! But no joy.
Can with the inside leg kick.
A jab from Can misses.
C K looked like he wanted to counter with a punch but didn't throw it.
A low kick from Can misses
and C K counters with a nice uppercut.
C K steps to his left, right into the path of a big body kick from Can. That one must have hurt.
Can finds nothing but air with that leg kick attempt.
C K throws out a counter right but Can avoids it with no problem.
Can connects with a body shot.

That's two minutes gone in the round.
Can just misses with a punch to the body.
It seemed like C K was going to counter with the hook but didn't fully commit to it.
C K has tried to improve his agility in the runup to this fight.
Can throws a body kick that misses.
C K looks like he wants to counter punch here.
Can throws a couple of head shots and lands with the final one - a decent hook, which struck C K on the side of the head.
Can lands a high kick!
Can looks to throw the jab but C K is out of range.
C K is trying to avoid his opponent's strikes and get into the clinch.
Wooooo! Give it up for these two warriors! They are putting on a show!
A jab from Can does it's job there.
A telegraphed right hand from Can misses the target.
C K throws out a counter right but Can avoids it with no problem.
A looping hook to the body misses from Can. C K does a little dance to reset his feet.
Can scores with a decent looking hook.

That's three minutes gone in the round.
Can misses with a body punch
and C K counters with a lovely straight right hand!
Can throws a poor cross that misses
and C K counters with a lovely straight right hand!
Can moving in and out of range nicely, whilst landing the scoring shot.
Can scores with a body shot.
Can throws a nice hook to the body that draws an oooh from the crowd.
Can moves into range and lands a nice leg kick.
C K uses decent footwork to sidestep a right hand from Can.
It seemed like C K was going to counter with the hook but didn't fully commit to it.
Can throws an uppercut from half a mile away. C K sees it coming and avoids it easily.
C K swings away with a counter right hand but no contact made.

That's four minutes gone in the round.
Can misses the shot to the body.
Can listening to his corner there, landing a nice uppercut.
C K blocks a jab.
Can throws a front kick that sends C K stumbling back into the cage.
The crowd cheering loudly, showing their appreciation for the quality fight we're seeing here.
Can looks to score with a jab to the body but C K is just out of range.
C K ducks under an overhand right and circles away with a smile on his face.
Can tries to score with a low kick but C K moves his leg out of the way.
And an attempted straight right on the counter from C K! But no joy.
C K uses good footwork to avoid the strikes from Can.
C K throws out a counter right but Can avoids it with no problem.
And that is the end of the round. The fighters go back to their corners.

Ameri Can dominated that round.
OK. That's time! The bell goes and we're back to the action.

Can takes a swing at C K's ribcage but misses.
Can tries to land with a swinging hook to the body but C K was well out of range. Poor timing from Can.
C K looks like he wants to counter punch here.
Can connects with an inside leg kick.
A big right from Can misses.
A little jabbing left from C K on the counter but it doesn't find it's target.
Can fakes a jab and throws a low kick but C K checks it well.
Both these guys seem content to just stand up and trade with each other but C K might want to think about changing up his gameplan a bit because over the course of the fight, Can has got the better of the exchanges.
A big left from Can misses.
C K throws out a counter right but Can avoids it with no problem.
We've had a slow start to the round here - hopefully the action picks up.
Can throws a big shot that misses.
And an attempted straight right on the counter from C K! But no joy.
Can swings and misses with a hook to the body.
And an attempted straight right on the counter from C K! But no joy.
Can throws a poor cross that misses
and C K counters with a stiff right hand.

That's one minute gone in the round.
The fighters circling - Can throws out the jab but it was never going to land.
C K steps in looking to clinch after the strikes miss from Can.
Can scores with a nice head shot.
Can misses the shot to the body.
C K slips a straight right by Can.
A little jabbing left from C K on the counter but it doesn't find it's target.
Ameri Can seems to be the more aggressive standup fighter in this bout.
C K takes a shot right to the liver - Bas would have been proud of that punch.
Can is looking to land body kicks.
Can swings for the body but C K moves out of range.
It seemed like C K was going to counter with the hook but didn't fully commit to it.
Can misses with a half-hearted attempt at a head kick.
Can misses with a body shot. Nice footwork from C K.

That's two minutes gone in the round.
Can bobs and weaves and unloads with a good uppercut.
A shot to the liver by Can. Beautiful body shot.
C K might want to mix his strikes up a bit more. He's just going for head shots at the moment and that can become a bit predictable.
Can throws a predictable looking body shot
and C K counters with a straight right hand.
Ameri Can is winning the standup battle so far.
C K takes an uppercut right on the jaw but it doesn't phase him.
C K steps to the side to avoid the strikes from Can.
C K changes levels for a counter takedown but doesn't follow through with his attempt.
Can lands a head kick!
The crowd cheering loudly, showing their appreciation for the quality fight we're seeing here.
C K slips under a jab.
A jab from Can misses.
A little jabbing left from C K on the counter but it doesn't find it's target.

That's three minutes gone in the round.
Can throws a jab when C K was well out of range.
Can throws out a leg kick but C K moves out of range and Can only half commits.
Can attempts a leg kick but it's missed by a good margin.
C K takes a shot right to the bread basket.
Can cracks a nice hook into C K's ribs.
A low kick from Can is predictable there

and C K counters into the clinch. Nicely done.
Can blocking some punches.
A head punch blocked on the inside by Can.
C K throws a head punch that misses.
Can blocks a couple of punches on the inside.

That's four minutes gone in the round.
C K swings wildly with an uppercut but Can uses good head movement to avoid it.
A head punch on the inside from Can fails to land.
C K misses with a short punch on the inside.
C K misses with a punch on the inside.
Can blocks a punch to the side of the head.
C K misses with some punches.
Can lands with a short shot to the head.
A head punch on the inside from C K fails to land.
C K throws a head punch that misses.
C K misses with the head strike.
C K blocks a couple of punches on the inside.
C K prevents Can from breaking the clinch.

Can's corner calls for him to break the clinch, which he does.
Wooooo! Give it up for these two warriors! They are putting on a show!
Can throws a shot from downtown. C K moves away and avoids it.
And an attempted straight right on the counter from C K! But no joy.
C K takes one on the chin but seems OK.
And that is the end of the round. The fighters go back to their corners.

Ameri Can dominated that second round.
That's the end of the interval. I'm sure that seemed a lot quicker than a minute for our two fighters! Back to the action. The crowd applaud as we get ready to start the final round!

Can throws a half hearted mid kick.
C K looked like he wanted to counter with a punch but didn't throw it.
Can misses with a low kick.
And an attempted straight right on the counter from C K! But no joy.
Can swings away with a leg kick that misses.
Can buckles his opponent's knee momentarily with a nice leg kick.
Can lands a vicious shot with the stealth of a sniper and the strength of a viper. Are vipers that strong? I can think of lots of things that are stronger than a viper - not many rhyme with sniper though.
Can tried to score with a low kick but C K checks it.
Can is really dominating this fight. Is there anything that C K can do to turn this around?
We've had a slow start to the round here - hopefully the action picks up.
Can throws a jab but it's blocked by C K.
C K avoids the body shot from Can.
C K swings away with a counter right hand but no contact made.
Can misses with an uppercut
and C K counters with a good right hand that lands right on the jaw.

That's one minute gone in the round.
Can throws a sloppy body shot
and C K counters with a straight right hand.
Can dances in quickly and lands a nice inside leg kick on C K. That did some damage!
Can misses the shot to the body.
C K swings away with a counter right hand but no contact made.
Can with a jab.
Can throws a sloppy head kick and C K moves out of range easily.
Can throws a right hand that misses
and C K counters with a good right hand that lands right on the jaw.
C K uses some good footwork to avoid the body shot by Can.
Can waving his hands out in front of him, looking to distract C K.
Louis C K has stepped it up - he knows he needs a finish here!

That's two minutes gone in the round.
C K avoids the body shot from Can.
C K moves out of range as Can strikes.
Can changes levels and scores with a jab to the body.
Can lands a nice looking body shot.
C K blocks a jab.
Can moves into range and lands a nice leg kick.
C K takes a step back and watches a body kick go sailing past his mid section.
And an attempted straight right on the counter from C K! But no joy.
We've seen a great period of action over the last minute or so - credit to both fighters for going all out!
Can does a little shimmy and throws a leg kick. The leg kick missed by a considerable margin though, making him look a little bit silly for doing the shimmy.

That's three minutes gone in the round.
A lazy body kick from Can
and C K connects with a straight left hand counter down the middle.
Can misses with an uppercut
enabling C K to counter with a crisp jab.
C K takes a really solid shot there but just smiles back and shrugs his shoulders.
Can throws the kick towards the body but C K avoids it.
A little jabbing left from C K on the counter but it doesn't find it's target.
Can misses with a shot to the body
letting C K counter with a right hand.
C K avoids the body shot from Can.
Can thows a leg kick but C K checks it
and C K counters with a lovely straight right hand!
Can falls off balance throwing a combination
and C K counters with a lovely straight right hand!
Ameri Can is fighting for a decision here - he's started to take the cautious approach.

That's four minutes gone in the round.
Can throws a sloppy head kick and C K moves out of range easily.
C K throws out a counter right but Can avoids it with no problem.
Can wants to land a leg kick but C K is out of range.
C K takes a jab on the nose. He smiles like he loves it and keeps coming.
Can works C K's body with a nice hook.
The crowd cheering loudly, showing their appreciation for the quality fight we're seeing here.
C K moves out of range of the strikes.
C K swings away with a counter right hand but no contact made.
Can missing with a left hand there. C K was out of range so wasted energy throwing that one.
Can misses the jab.
C K looks like he wants to counter punch here.

And that's the end of the fight!
Ameri Can showed his dominance in that final round.
Well I reckon that's a shut out for Can, winning every round. Will the judges agree? They are the ones who matter, even if they are often depressingly incompetent. Over to the ring announcer for the scorecards.

Ladies and gentlemen, after 3 rounds of action, we go to the scorecards for a decision.
Judge Stewart Dunkirk scores the fight 30:27
Judge Tiny Johnson scores the fight 30:27
Judge George Francis scores the fight 30:27

In favor of your winner, by unanimous decision... Ameri Can!
Ameri Can decided to go for the less than humble approach in his post fight interview, telling everyone how he is going to conquer the world. The crowd seemed to like it when really that sort of approach could have gone either way.
Louis C K was interviewed post fight and said 'Back to drawing board, i suck.'.