PBP Commentary

Coming up we have a light heavyweight MMA rules bout between Jozko Krakenik (ranked 3054 p4p, 1982 weight class) and Stinky Armpits (ranked 398 p4p, 273 weight class). Armpits is bouncing up and down as he enters the arena, backed by Side to Side. Jozko Krakenik is staring across the cage at his opponent, tweaking his nipples... Tweaking his own nipples that is.

Krakenik
vs
Armpits

191 cm
20
204
5 - 3 - 0

190 cm
20
215
4 - 2 - 0

Decent wrestler
Counter fighter
Granite chin

BJJ Purple Belt
Excellent MT
Good gas tank

Brooklyn Apothecary

Ladies and gentlemen. This fight is 3 rounds, in the light heavyweight division.
Introducing the fighter to my left, fighting out of the red corner.
With a record of 5 - 3 - 0, fighting out of Sydney, Jozko Krakenik!
And introducing the fighter to my right, fighting out of the blue corner.
With a record of 4 - 2 - 0, fighting out of Las Vegas, Stinky Armpits!
The judges for this bout are Marco Blurström, Johanna Lukiainen and Tarja Halkonen.

The bell rings for round one and we are underway!
The bell rings for round one and we are underway!
Armpits clobbers Krakenik with an overhand right that has the crowd gasping. That made a horrendous noise.

It looks like Jozko Krakenik has been cut.
Armpits shapes like he's going to throw a leg kick but settles back down.
Krakenik drops down looking for a counter takedown but Armpits sprawls and moves away.
Armpits throws a lazy right hand but Krakenik sees it coming a mile off and sidesteps it easily.
Krakenik looked to counter that last move with a leg kick but didn't pull the trigger.
Armpits getting the better of the striking in that exchange.
Armpits misses with a hook. Krakenik ducked under it nicely.
Krakenik drops down looking for a counter takedown but Armpits sprawls and moves away.
Krakenik swings widly with a right hand
and Krakenik takes a counter punch right on the button for his troubles.
Krakenik moves out of range of the strikes.
Nice straight punches there by Armpits. You know Roy Jones Jr respects the hands of Armpits.
Armpits waving his hands out in front of him, looking to distract Krakenik.
Armpits looks to throw the jab but Krakenik is out of range.
Armpits jabs Krakenik to the body, keeping him at a distance.
Armpits waving his hands out in front of him, looking to distract Krakenik.
We've seen a great period of action over the last minute or so - credit to both fighters for going all out!
Armpits throws an overhand right that lands on Krakenik's shoulder, as Krakenik tries to avoid the shot.

That's one minute gone in the round.
Krakenik shakes his hands off, looking to compose himself, but takes a jab to the jaw whilst he does it.
Armpits lands a jab, followed by a cross and another cross, as Krakenik backs up against the cage.

Oooooh!!! Armpits has knocked Krakenik down with a huge combo! Armpits steps away and waves a wobbly Krakenik back to his feet! This one might not go much longer!

Krakenik is rocked!
Wooooo! Give it up for these two warriors! They are putting on a show!
Armpits ducks down into range and throws a picture perfect right hook that connects with Krakenik's jaw. Krakenik's eyes stare off into space as he falls to the mat, out cold! Armpits does the decent thing and steps back, rather than landing any shots to his unconscious opponent.

Ladies and gentlemen, after 1:25 of round 1, we have a winner by way of KO (Punch). Stinky Armpits!
Stinky Armpits decided to go for the less than humble approach in his post fight interview, telling everyone how he is going to conquer the world. The crowd seemed to like it when really that sort of approach could have gone either way.