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 Hello everyone im Rudy “The Box” Knife and I wont be joined by my idiot partner “Sunshine” Weston Markson I have locked his biased ass out of the studio. Im am here simply to discuss HMMA 87 or shall I call it HMMA KIMURA!. You see people quite simply put Saturday MMA’s finest Brazilian Jiu Jitsu practitioner will don his black belt and destroy Jack Machin in the HMMA cage.
*BANG BANG KNOCK KNOCK*
Weston: RUDY! Let me in you bitch!, *BOOM*…..
Hello everyone im “Sunshine” Weston Markson ..
Rudy: You can shut up Weston I already took care of it.
Weston: I heard everything you said, and I couldn’t disagree more you know what just never mind shall we get into this!
MAIN EVENT
#5 "The Gracie Killer" Masahiko Kimura v Jack "Attack" Machin (15-8)
Weston: The main event of HMMA 87, a lightweight fight between the self proclaimed BJJ god and Jack Machin.
Rudy: I don’t like the way you are talking about Mas. I think you need to check yourself.
Weston: As I was saying the 5th ranked Lightweight headlines the card in a lightweight battle that acts as a huge test In my opinion for Kimura. Machin and Kimura have both been top level lightweights Machin 6-2 in HMMA has on several occasions been one win away from a title shot, a win here could get him ranked back into the top 10 and most importantly shut that fool Masahiko Kimura’s mouth!. I hate this guy is anyone else sick of his complaining? He treats no one with respect except fellow douche …yeah I mean you Rudy.
Rudy: Watch it.
Weston: He has run his mouth about everyone and everything is there nothing he doesn’t complain about? He complains about HMMA matchmaking, owner, fans, money, im surprised he hasn’t claimed his opponents are in love with him and try to touch his pecker in the cage! He is full of himself and his head continues to swell with every win now at 7-0 its time his for his head to explode.
Rudy: Oh boy you just never learn Rudy: As we all know by now I am Mas’s biggest fan! He is the greatest fighter to ever grace the HMMA cage…period. Now I once again got to hang with Mas in one of the greatest moments of my life he and I made a HeroTube video of what could be the greatest interview ever with greatest man to grace god's green earth, the soon to be next HMMA Lightweight Champion and MY best friend Masahiko Kimura. Lets play the interview. “Mas, June 8th you headline, deservedly so... deservedly so... HMMA 87 and your opponent... Jack "Attack" Machin... your thoughts? KIMURA: Hey Rudy, yes HMMA 87 like you say, DESERVEDLY SO, I headline the top spot with Jack "Attack" Machin. Being the main event guy means that you are the reason why all these people in London wish to part with their dole money just to get a glimpse at greatness, its the reason why Wilson is having his ear chewed off by all the media barons who are constantly phoning him because they wish to air this event on their PPV stations, it's the reason why back in my hometown, Kumamoto, which is a nice place may I add, the Mayor has declared a Bank Holiday and the people will stay home to watch THEIR ROLE MODEL... Mashiko Kimura. Hey Rudy, do you think it's a coincidence that Wilson has put me at the head of this event since HMMA has fallen from the Number One organisation in London to third?! The answer is NOOOO.... I don't blame Wilson, this is actually a smart move for him... putting me as the marquee guy guarantees a return to Number One status, very smart... however it takes TWO to tango in a main event Rudy, which leads me to my opponent Jack "Attack" Machin, I mean who is this guy? really Wilson, really, you're going to put a guy like Jack Machin in the main event with me? "The Gracie Killer", the greatest BJJ practioner in ALLLLL of MMA? Need I have to remind you THAT IM SEVEN AND O in your company... that's right 7-0.. that means that you have lined up SEVEN of your best and I've beaten every single one... and now yiou think Jack Machin DESERVES a chance to ruin my record? My god are you wrong, do you think Lee Machin was wrong when he dumped this guys ass? Man this guy was sooo bad he even made Lee leave the world of MMA management, check it out, it's all true.... and to top it off, this sooo called Wrestling god hasn't even bothered to TRAIN for this fight. Wilson, I congratulate you on convincing my manager that theres a reason for me sticking around and signing a new contract but there's only one reason that I have stuck around, and that is to see this organisation crumble, I am going to beat every man that you put in front of me, EVERY MAN, I am going to take the Lightweight Championship and I am going to make sure that I am the LAST ever HMMA Lightweight champion. Jack "Attack" Machin, you just don't know how much trouble you are in boy, 8th June Hard Knocks Arena London may just be your resting place. Sweet Dreams (blows a kiss down the camera and walks away)”
In the battle between blackbelts who wins?
Prediction: Kimura by 2nd round triangle.
CO-MAIN EVENT
#7 Matt "$Dollar$" Leach (7-1) v Tuomas Keto (36-17)
Weston: A middleweight contest will see 7th ranked Matt Leach take on Tuomas Keto in the CO-MAIN EVENT. Keto makes his HMMA debut, but he is no stranger to the fight game with 53 professional fights he has a lot of experience and a name many recognize. Leach is on the opposite end of the spectrum with under 10 fights, he does however show huge promise and rides a 4 fight win streak. A win could propel himself forward in the rankings and possibly one day build a championship resume.
Rudy: You know I love a good fight and this one is sure to be so. Matt Leach is a really good fighter who is gaining steam and improving with every fight. I wouldn’t say he has a weakness in his game but his ground game isn’t yet on caliber with some of the great fighters. This fight will actually prove a test for just that as Tuomas Keto has solid standup but really excels at the ground game. With 12 wins by submission he has a bit of an advantage on the ground. This one is pretty simple in my eyes striker vs grappler who ever keeps the other guy in their world takes it.
Prediction: I think Matt Leach can stall enough on the ground to score a late KO.
MAIN CARD
Dova Lova v Lyov Kirijenko
Steven Walter v Monte Christo
Joe Ball v Lance Hong
Andy Couture v Chuck Bonjesky
PRELIMS
Boris Konstantinov v Tommy Farr
Jim Beam v Hakeem Diaw
Emil Blonksy v Peter Comradi
Bob Banks v Cerventes Bison
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