2012-01-05
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Boomerang!! Kickboxing Tournament Uncovered!

Editorial by Boomerang !!

Rumors were swirling around that Boomerang!! in Sydney has been recruiting fighters to be in an openweight kickboxing division. Tycoon Times reporters caught up with Boomerang!! top Light Heavyweight Andrei Marshall (10-5-1) who confirmed some of the rumors. "I know something's going on, but when I offered my services to Boomerang!! as a kickboxer I was told that my services were preferred as a MMA fighter for now. I didn't get it, they want to be an elite company, I AM an ELITE fighter, so if they are starting a kickboxing division why not include me?". Messages left for many Boomerang!! managers went without a response and when commentator Chase Johnson answered his cell phone he simply laughed while saying "You better be sure to watch Boomerang!! and stock up on gear from MMA Animal, because IT'S ABOUT TO GET REAL!" and disconnected his line still laughing with what sounded like numerous women in the background.

Finally, just as Tycoon Times reporters were running out of sources and no closer to confirming the story, we ran into new fighter Daryl The Zombie Killer (0-0) as he was half-drunk in an Atlanta strip club and spending money like there was no tomorrow. "I'm having the time of MY LIFE!!" he shouted with a couple of 200 lbs women shaking all over him. I asked him where he got all of his dough, it seemed quite a bit for a debut fighter, and I hadn't seen any zombies around. "I'm going to be the Boomerang!! kickboxing tournament winner, won't I baby!" he directs to one of the stippers. When I asked him to elaborate he seemed to ignore me, but I soon realized he finally had a little too much and was possibly asleep on one of his large escorts.

We then went to Boomerang!! headquarters in Sydney with our findings. As I confronted Jason with the results of my hard sweat and investigative skills he just gave a smirk and said "Did you ever check the Boomerang!! homepage morons? It tells you everything. Boomerang!! is holding a kickboxing tournament for new fighters created to be kickboxers. Fighters must weight between 200-300 lbs. The manager of the winner will receive $20,000 to spend as he chooses and we plan to give out another $10,000 in cash to the participants based on their ranking and performance. Great work Sherlock........ Did you also 'discover' we are always hiring MMA fighters from around the world too?" Needless to say we did feel a little silly when we looked at the Boomerang!! homepage in Sydney and saw all of the details advertised publicly.

 

Spots are still available! Create a kickboxer and join the Boomerang! Kickboxing Tournament!

 

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