PBP Commentary

Coming up we have a heavyweight MMA rules bout between Odin Thorsen (ranked 0 p4p, 0 weight class) and Theodore Thundercunt (ranked 0 p4p, 0 weight class). Thundercunt has chosen What a Wonderful World-Louis Armstrong as his entrance music. This should be a great matchup!

Thorsen
vs
Thundercunt

198 cm
22
250 lbs
10 - 2 - 0

194 cm
29
245 lbs
15 - 6 - 0

BJJ Blue Belt
Excellent boxer
Cardio machine

Decent wrestler
Excellent boxer
Good gas tank

Urban Fighter

Ladies and gentlemen. This fight is 3 rounds, in the heavyweight division.
Introducing the fighter to my left, fighting out of the red corner.
With a record of 10 - 2 - 0, fighting out of Los Angeles, Odin Thorsen!
And introducing the fighter to my right, fighting out of the blue corner.
With a record of 15 - 6 - 0, fighting out of Las Vegas, Theodore Thundercunt!
The judges for this bout are Jack Bonds, Frank Antenori and Don Winkell.

The bell rings for round one and we are underway!
Thundercunt doesn't manage to clinch there - Thorsen circles away.

Thundercunt closes the distance and clinches.
Thundercunt throws a punch but it's blocked by Thorsen.
Thorsen is looking to break free of the clinch but Thundercunt has double underhooks.
Thundercunt lands a right uppercut that snaps the head of Thorsen backwards.

Thorsen breaks the clinch.

Thorsen gets tackled into the cage by Thundercunt. Thundercunt maintains the clinch.
Thorsen wants to strike at distance but he can't break free of the clinch.
An uppercut on the inside fails to land for Thundercunt.
Thundercunt misses with the head strike.
Thundercunt swings wildly with an uppercut but Thorsen uses good head movement to avoid it.
Thorsen blocks a couple of punches on the inside.

Thorsen manages to break the clinch.
Thorsen swings wildly with a right hand that was never going to find it's target.
Thorsen circles away from the clinch attempt.
We've had a slow start to the round here - hopefully the action picks up.
Thundercunt tries to close the distance and clinch up but Thorsen swats him away and circles back towards the center.

Thundercunt gets a clinch.
Thundercunt swings wildly with an uppercut but Thorsen uses good head movement to avoid it.

Thorsen's corner calls for him to break the clinch, which he does.
Thundercunt wants to clinch up but Thorsen keeps it at a distance.
Thorsen misses with a hook. Thundercunt ducked under it nicely.

That's one minute gone in the round.
Thorsen throws out a loose jab but Thundercunt uses good head movement to avoid it.
Thorsen cracks Thundercunt with a hook to the jaw. Both fighters smile at eachother and high-five before getting back down to business.
Thorsen throws a monster uppercut resembling something out of street fighter but it doesn't land.

Thundercunt clinches with his opponent.
Thorsen blocks a punch to the side of the head.
A frustrated look appears on Thorsen's face as he tries to break the clinch.
Thundercunt throws a head punch that misses.

Thorsen escapes the clinch and we're back to striking.
Thorsen digs a good hook to Thundercunt's body.
Thorsen lands an overhand left. A wild punch that just about connected.

Thundercunt moves into the clinch.

Thorsen's corner calls for him to break the clinch, which he does.
Thorsen waving his hands out in front of him, looking to distract Thundercunt.
Thundercunt tries to clinch up but Thorsen circles away and keeps his distance.
Wow, both these guys are really going for it!

Thundercunt rushes Thorsen and pushes him back against the cage in a clinch.
A short right from Thundercunt.
The fans in attendance giving it up for the two fighters, who have really let it all hang out in the last minute or so!
Thundercunt makes some space for himself and lands an uppercut.
Thorsen has had enough of the clinch but Thundercunt keeps him there for the moment.
Thundercunt has been looking to improve his clinch game in recent weeks. Thorsen seems to have the measure of him in the clinch so far, so let's see if Thundercunt can turn it around.
Thorsen wants to push off and get back to the center of the mat but Thundercunt has him pressed against the cage.
A short right from Thundercunt on the inside.
Thundercunt misses with a short punch on the inside.
A nice right hand lands inside from Thundercunt.

That's two minutes gone in the round.

Thorsen manages to break the clinch.

Thundercunt drives through and clinches with Thorsen against the cage.
Thorsen is trying to break free.
Thundercunt working aggressively here.
Thundercunt throws a punch but it's blocked by Thorsen.
Thorsen is trying to break free.
Thundercunt misses with the head strike.
Thorsen blocking some punches.
Thundercunt swings wildly with an uppercut but Thorsen uses good head movement to avoid it.

Thorsen's corner calls for him to break the clinch, which he does.

Thundercunt pushes Thorsen up against the cage in a clinch.

Thorsen breaks the clinch and we're back to striking at distance.

Thundercunt clinches with his opponent.
Thundercunt misses with the head strike.
A head punch on the inside from Thundercunt fails to land.
An uppercut on the inside fails to land for Thundercunt.

Thorsen breaks the clinch.

Thundercunt pushes Thorsen up against the cage in a clinch.
Thorsen blocks an uppercut.
Thorsen blocks a couple of punches on the inside.
Thundercunt lands a short shot on the inside that snaps the head of Thorsen backwards.

That's three minutes gone in the round.
Thundercunt misses with the head strike.
Thundercunt misses with the head strike.
Thorsen is trying to force a seperation but Thundercunt has the dominant position.
Thundercunt lands a short shot on the inside that snaps the head of Thorsen backwards.
Thundercunt misses with the head strike.
Thundercunt misses with the head strike.
Thorsen wants to break the clinch but can't.
Thorsen has had enough of the clinch but Thundercunt keeps him there for the moment.
Thorsen tries to circle away but Thundercunt has him pinned against the cage.
A frustrated look appears on Thorsen's face as he tries to break the clinch.
Thundercunt misses with a short punch on the inside.
Thundercunt misses with some punches.

Thorsen breaks from the clinch.
Thundercunt tries to clinch but Thorsen moves out of range.
Thundercunt slips a straight right by Thorsen.
A jab from Thorsen misses.
Thundercunt tries to close the distance and clinch up but Thorsen swats him away and circles back towards the center.
Thundercunt fails with an attempt to clinch.
Thorsen throws an overhand right that lands on Thundercunt's shoulder, as Thundercunt tries to avoid the shot.
Thundercunt tries to close the distance and clinch but Thorsen swats him to one side with an open hand palm strike and circles away.
Thundercunt tries to clinch but Thorsen moves out of range.

That's four minutes gone in the round.
Thundercunt fails with an attempt to clinch.

The fight moves into the clinch position.

Thorsen's corner calls for him to break the clinch, which he does.
Thundercunt tries to close the distance and clinch but Thorsen swats him to one side with an open hand palm strike and circles away.
Thundercunt tries to close the distance and clinch up but Thorsen swats him away and circles back towards the center.
Thundercunt is looking to clinch.
Thorsen swung with a counter right hand that didn't connect.

Thundercunt has managed to clinch.
Thorsen has had enough of the clinch and is looking to separate.
Thundercunt misses with some punches.
We've seen a great period of action over the last minute or so - credit to both fighters for going all out!
Thundercunt swings wildly with an uppercut but Thorsen uses good head movement to avoid it.

Thorsen escapes the clinch and we're back to striking.
Thorsen is really head hunting here, hardly looking to strike to the body at all.
Thorsen throws out a loose jab but Thundercunt uses good head movement to avoid it.

Thorsen gets tackled into the cage by Thundercunt. Thundercunt maintains the clinch.
Thorsen has had enough of the clinch but Thundercunt keeps him there for the moment.
Thundercunt misses with a hook from the clinch.

Thorsen pushes off and circles away, back to the middle of the mat.
Thorsen swings wildly with a right hand that was never going to find it's target.
Thundercunt uses decent footwork to sidestep a right hand from Thorsen.
Thorsen misses with a hook. Thundercunt ducked under it nicely.
And that’s the end of the round – the fighters go back to their corners.

Theodore Thundercunt dominated that round.
The minute break is over - no more time for sponges and pep talks - back to the action!

Thorsen connects with a slap. Keep your fist closed son.
Thorsen throws a hook but Thundercunt avoids it easily.
Thundercunt fails with an attempt to clinch.

Thundercunt forces Thorsen back against the cage and clinches.
Thorsen has had enough of the clinch and is looking to separate.
Thundercunt has Thorsen pressed against the cage, preventing Thorsen from circling away and getting back to striking at range.
Thorsen blocks an uppercut.
Thorsen is trying to break the clinch but Thundercunt is controlling him.

Thorsen pushes off and circles away, back to the middle of the mat.
Thorsen avoids the clinch attempt nicely.
Thorsen throwing a counter right hand but Thundercunt manages to avoid it.
Odin Thorsen is winning the standup battle so far.
Thundercunt is looking to take this fight into the clinch.
Thorsen throws a nice hook to the body that draws an oooh from the crowd.
We've had a slow start to the round here - hopefully the action picks up.
Thorsen just misses with a punch to the body.
Thorsen keeps the fight on the outside.
The fight stays on the outside here - Thundercunt looks like he's thinking about clinching though.
Thorsen is looking to counter with a shot to the body.
Thorsen pushing out the jab but it's not landing.
A little jabbing left from Thundercunt on the counter but it doesn't find it's target.
Thundercunt slips a jab and a cross from Thorsen.
Thundercunt blocks a jab.
Thundercunt now looks to counter with a shot at the body.

That's one minute gone in the round.
Thorsen missing with a left hand there. Thundercunt was out of range so wasted energy throwing that one.
Thundercunt tries to clinch there but Thorsen circles away.
A looping hook to the body misses from Thorsen. Thundercunt does a little dance to reset his feet.
Thundercunt tries to close the distance and clinch but Thorsen swats him to one side with an open hand palm strike and circles away.
Thorsen is looking light on his feet compared to last time was saw him fight.
Thorsen scores with a sloppy right hand. Thundercunt should have avoided that one.
Thorsen just misses with a punch to the body.

Thundercunt rushes Thorsen and pushes him back against the cage in a clinch.

Thorsen manages to break the clinch.
Thundercunt dodges the punch combination from Thorsen.
Thundercunt fails with an attempt to clinch.

Thundercunt moves into the clinch.
Thorsen can't break the clinch.
A head punch blocked on the inside by Thorsen.
Thorsen blocks an uppercut.
Thundercunt prevents Thorsen from breaking the clinch.
Thundercunt has Thorsen pressed against the cage, preventing Thorsen from circling away and getting back to striking at range.
Thorsen blocks a couple of punches on the inside.
Thorsen can't break the clinch.
Thorsen blocks a punch to the side of the head.

That's two minutes gone in the round.
Thorsen is trying to break free.
A head punch blocked on the inside by Thorsen.

Thorsen breaks from the clinch.
Thorsen getting the better of the striking in that exchange.

Thorsen gets tackled into the cage by Thundercunt. Thundercunt maintains the clinch.
This is a great period of action - very entertaining stuff!
Thundercunt has a couple of punches blocked by Thorsen.
Thundercunt misses with a punch on the inside.
Thundercunt keeps control of Thorsen as he tries to wriggle out of the double underhooks.
Thorsen is trying to break free.
Thorsen tries to circle away but Thundercunt has him pinned against the cage.
Thundercunt lands a shoulder strike.
A frustrated look appears on Thorsen's face as he tries to break the clinch.
Thorsen is trying to break the clinch but Thundercunt has him pressed against the cage.
Thundercunt misses with some punches.
Thorsen blocking some punches.
Thorsen blocks an uppercut.
Thorsen blocks a couple of punches on the inside.

Thorsen escapes the clinch and we're back to striking.
Nice straight punches there by Thorsen. You know Roy Jones Jr respects the hands of Thorsen.
Thundercunt tries to clinch up but Thorsen circles away and keeps his distance.
A telegraphed right hand from Thorsen misses the target.
It seemed like Thundercunt was going to counter with the hook but didn't fully commit to it.
Thundercunt moves away from the strike by Thorsen.

That's three minutes gone in the round.
Thorsen throws a monster uppercut resembling something out of street fighter but it doesn't land.
Thundercunt fails with an attempt to clinch.
Thorsen misses with a straight left.

Thundercunt clinches with his opponent.
Thorsen blocks an uppercut.
Thundercunt lands a right hand.

Thorsen escapes the clinch and we're back to striking.
Thorsen jabbing away but nothing is landing.
Thundercunt is looking to clinch.

Thundercunt forces Thorsen back against the cage and clinches.
Thundercunt misses with a hook from the clinch.
A nice right hand lands inside from Thundercunt.
Thorsen wants to push off and get back to the center of the mat but Thundercunt has him pressed against the cage.
Thundercunt lands with a short head shot on the inside.

Thorsen breaks the clinch and we return to the middle of the mat.
Thorsen throws a lazy right hand but Thundercunt sees it coming a mile off and sidesteps it easily.
A big left from Thorsen misses.
Thorsen moves into range and connects with a jab.
This is a great period of action - very entertaining stuff!

Thorsen gets tackled into the cage by Thundercunt. Thundercunt maintains the clinch.
Thorsen is trying to push Thundercunt away but Thundercunt has him pressed against the cage, so he's going nowhere.

That's four minutes gone in the round.

Thorsen pushes off and circles away, back to the middle of the mat.
Thorsen throws an overhand right that lands on Thundercunt's shoulder, as Thundercunt tries to avoid the shot.
Thundercunt ducks under a wild hook from Thorsen.
Thundercunt keeping his hands up high there, blocking the jab from Thorsen.
Thundercunt fails with an attempt to clinch.
Thundercunt tries to close the distance and clinch but Thorsen swats him to one side with an open hand palm strike and circles away.

Thundercunt closes the distance and presses his opponent up against the cage.

Thorsen manages to break the clinch.
Thundercunt takes a jab right on the kisser.
Thundercunt doesn't manage to clinch there - Thorsen circles away.
Thundercunt blocks a jab.
Thundercunt takes a jab right on the kisser.
Thundercunt fails with an attempt to clinch.
Thundercunt ducks under a wild hook from Thorsen.
Thundercunt tries to close the distance and clinch up against the cage but Thorsen paws at him with a jab and circles away.
Thorsen throws out a token jab with nothing on it.
Thundercunt uses some good footwork to avoid the body shot by Thorsen.

Thundercunt has closed the distance and engaged Thorsen in a clinch.
Thundercunt working aggressively here.
And that’s the end of the round – the fighters go back to their corners.

Odin Thorsen dominated that second round.
OK. That's time! The bell goes and we're back to the action. And we move into the final round!

Thundercunt uses good head movement to avoid the hook from Thorsen.
Thundercunt fails in his attempt to clinch.
Thorsen scores with a hook.

Thundercunt moves into range and clinches up with Thorsen.
Thorsen wants to push off and get back to the center of the mat but Thundercunt has him pressed against the cage.
Thorsen is trying to push Thundercunt away but Thundercunt has him pressed against the cage, so he's going nowhere.
Thundercunt swings wildly with an uppercut but Thorsen uses good head movement to avoid it.
Thundercunt lands a hook to the side of the head.
Thundercunt lands a left hand.
Thundercunt misses with a hook from the clinch.
Thorsen working hard to break the clinch.
Thorsen wants to get back to striking at distance but Thundercunt won't allow it.
Thorsen blocks an uppercut.
A short right hand to the side of the head by Thundercunt.
We've had a slow start to the round here - hopefully the action picks up.
Thundercunt misses with a hook from the clinch.
Thundercunt tries a shoulder strike but it doesn't do any damage.
Thorsen is trying to push Thundercunt away but Thundercunt has him pressed against the cage, so he's going nowhere.
Thundercunt swings away with an uppercut that misses.
Thundercunt tries a shoulder strike but it doesn't do any damage.
Thundercunt tries a shoulder strike but it doesn't do any damage.
Thorsen tries to circle away but Thundercunt has him pinned against the cage.

That's one minute gone in the round.
Thundercunt swings wildly with an uppercut but Thorsen uses good head movement to avoid it.

Thorsen breaks the clinch and we're back to striking at distance.
Thundercunt uses decent footwork to sidestep a right hand from Thorsen.
Thundercunt wants to clinch.
Thundercunt moves out of range as Thorsen strikes.
Thundercunt tries to close the distance and clinch up against the cage but Thorsen paws at him with a jab and circles away.
Thorsen throws out a token jab with nothing on it.
Thorsen lunges in with an uppercut that skims his opponent's chin.

The fight moves into the clinch position.
Thorsen wants to strike at distance but he can't break free of the clinch.
Thorsen blocking some punches.
Thorsen blocking some punches.

Thorsen's corner calls for him to break the clinch, which he does.

Thorsen gets tackled into the cage by Thundercunt. Thundercunt maintains the clinch.
Thorsen tries to break free but Thundercunt pushes him back against the cage.
Thorsen can't break the clinch.

That's two minutes gone in the round.
Thorsen wants to break free but Thundercunt has control.
Thorsen is trying to break the clinch but Thundercunt has him pressed against the cage.

Thorsen manages to break the clinch.
Thundercunt moves out of range as Thorsen strikes.
Thundercunt wants to clinch.
Thundercunt moves out of range of the strikes.

Thorsen gets tackled into the cage by Thundercunt. Thundercunt maintains the clinch.
Thorsen wants to push off and get back to the center of the mat but Thundercunt has him pressed against the cage.
Thorsen's head jolts backwards as he takes an uppercut right on the button!
The crowd are loving this. Great action here.

Thorsen breaks from the clinch.

Thorsen gets tackled into the cage by Thundercunt. Thundercunt maintains the clinch.
Thundercunt misses with a punch on the inside.
Thorsen blocking some punches.
Thorsen wants to strike at distance but he can't break free of the clinch.
Thorsen tries to break free but Thundercunt pushes him back against the cage.
Thorsen can't break the clinch.
Thundercunt misses with a short punch on the inside.
Theodore Thundercunt seems to be working more effectively in the clinch in the fight so far.
Thorsen blocks a punch to the side of the head.
Thorsen wants to strike at distance but he can't break free of the clinch.

That's three minutes gone in the round.
Thundercunt lands with a short head shot on the inside.
Thorsen wants to break the clinch but can't.
Thorsen wants to break the clinch but can't.

Thorsen escapes the clinch and we're back to striking.
A swing and a miss from Thorsen.
Thundercunt tries to clinch up but Thorsen circles away and keeps his distance.
Thorsen looks to score with a jab to the body but Thundercunt is just out of range.
Thorsen misses with a lunging right hand
and Thundercunt counters with a nice uppercut.
Thundercunt is pinned up against the cage taking some big shots here. The referee is looking closely deciding whether he should stop the fight.
Thorsen misses with a straight right.
Thorsen is the aggressor but that punch slipped nicely by Thundercunt.
Thorsen thows a left - swing and a miss!
Thorsen throws a shot from downtown. Thundercunt moves away and avoids it.

Thundercunt instigates a clinch.
Thorsen blocks a couple of punches on the inside.
Thorsen tries to break the clinch but Thundercunt is controlling the position.
Thundercunt throws a head punch that misses.
Thorsen wants to strike at distance but he can't break free of the clinch.
Thorsen blocks a couple of punches on the inside.
Thundercunt throws a head punch that misses.

That's four minutes gone in the round.
A shot in the inside from Thundercunt.
A short right from Thundercunt on the inside.
This is a great period of action - very entertaining stuff!
Thundercunt keeps the fight in the clinch, despite Thorsen's efforts to push away.
Thorsen has had enough of the clinch and is looking to separate.
Thundercunt has a couple of punches blocked by Thorsen.
Thorsen is trying to push Thundercunt away but Thundercunt has him pressed against the cage, so he's going nowhere.
Thundercunt throws a blind hook that connects with the side of Thorsens head.
Thorsen is trying to push Thundercunt away but Thundercunt has him pressed against the cage, so he's going nowhere.
Thundercunt misses with a punch on the inside.
A head punch on the inside from Thundercunt fails to land.
Thorsen is trying to push Thundercunt away but Thundercunt has him pressed against the cage, so he's going nowhere.
A head punch blocked on the inside by Thorsen.
Thundercunt misses with a punch on the inside.
Thorsen's head jolts backwards as he takes an uppercut right on the button!
Thundercunt lands a shoulder strike that jolts his opponent's head backwards.

Thorsen manages to break the clinch.
Thundercunt tries to clinch up.
Thorsen throws a looping overhand right but Thundercunt ducks down to avoid it.

Thundercunt clinches up with Thorsen and pushes him back against the cage.
Thorsen wants to get back to striking at distance but Thundercunt won't allow it.

And that's the end of the fight!
Theodore Thundercunt comfortably won the final round on my scorecard.
I think Thundercunt has won this one but let's see whether the judges agree with me. Over to the ring announcer for the scorecards.

Ladies and gentlemen, after 3 rounds of action, we go to the scorecards for a decision.
Judge Jack Bonds scores the fight 28:29
Judge Frank Antenori scores the fight 28:29
Judge Don Winkell scores the fight 28:29

In favor of your winner, by unanimous decision... Theodore Thundercunt!
In his post fight interview, Theodore Thundercunt started talking himself up. Luckily his charisma kept the crowd on side and gave him a good reception.