PBP Commentary

Coming up we have a light heavyweight MMA rules bout between BitchFace PoopyPants (ranked 0 p4p, 0 weight class) and Rocky Blyer (ranked 0 p4p, 0 weight class). PoopyPants's ring entrance music is that housewives' favourite, Deathly Quiet. Blyer has chosen Eye Of The Tiger as his entrance music. BitchFace PoopyPants has a significant reach advantage - let's see if he can make it count.

PoopyPants
vs
Blyer

197 cm
35
222 lbs
28 - 15 - 0

185 cm
43
210 lbs
39 - 42 - 1

Abu Dhabi Champ
World class boxer
Insanely flexible

Good wrestler
World class boxer
Good gas tank

Ladies and gentlemen. This fight is 3 rounds, in the light heavyweight division.
Introducing the fighter to my left, fighting out of the red corner.
With a record of 28 - 15 - 0, fighting out of New York, BitchFace PoopyPants!
And introducing the fighter to my right, fighting out of the blue corner.
With a record of 39 - 42 - 1, fighting out of New York, Rocky Blyer!
The judges for this bout are Paul Tew, Sam Margolis and Chris Edwards.

The bell rings for round one and we are underway!
Blyer connects with a jab.

PoopyPants closes the distance and clinches.
PoopyPants is stalling here.
With the two fighters working up against the cage, PoopyPants just misses with a elbow thrown towards Blyer's brow.
PoopyPants leaning his opponent against the cage.
PoopyPants just leaning against Blyer, taking a breather.
PoopyPants seems to have come into the fight with the intention of avoiding any damage in the clinch, rather than actually showing any aggression.
Blyer has had enough of the clinch and is looking to separate.

Blyer's corner calls for him to break the clinch, which he does.
PoopyPants slips under a jab.
Blyer misses with an uppercut.
PoopyPants looks to score with a jab to the body but Blyer is just out of range.
We've had a slow start to the round here - hopefully the action picks up.
PoopyPants throws a combination. Blyer tries to block but a couple of punches get through.
PoopyPants throws the left hand but Blyer avoids the punch easily.
PoopyPants looks to have improved his striking defense since last time we saw him fight.
PoopyPants slips under a jab from Blyer.
PoopyPants throws a body punch but Blyer moves out of range.
PoopyPants throws a jab to the body, straight down the pipe. Boom. That sent Blyer stumbling backwards but he manages to regain his composure quickly.
The crowd cheering loudly, showing their appreciation for the quality fight we're seeing here.
Blyer looks to land a right hand but PoopyPants moved out of range.

That's one minute gone in the round.
PoopyPants just misses with a punch to the body.
Blyer throws a right hand that PoopyPants ducks under and follows up with a left that PoopyPants also avoids with ease.

PoopyPants clinches up against the cage.

PoopyPants gets a trip takedown into half guard.

Blyer kicks off PoopyPants and gets to his feet.
PoopyPants misses with a body shot.
PoopyPants is looking to wear down Blyer with body shots, infact he's throwing more body shots than head shots at the moment.
PoopyPants takes one on the chin but keeps coming.
The crowd are loving this. Great action here.
PoopyPants walks into a jab.
Blyer avoids the body shot from PoopyPants.
Blyer pushing out the jab but it's not landing.
A combination from Blyer does no damage.
PoopyPants dips down and scores with a jab to the body.
PoopyPants tries to land with a swinging hook to the body but Blyer was well out of range. Poor timing from PoopyPants.
Blyer appears to be waiting to throw a counter punch to the body.
BitchFace PoopyPants seems to be the more aggressive standup fighter in this bout.
Blyer just misses with a punch to the body.
A little feinted left hand from PoopyPants on the counter but he doesn't commit to it.
Blyer scores to the head and body with a nice combination!
Blyer throws a wild combination but nothing lands.
Blyer scores with a three punch combo!

That's two minutes gone in the round.
Blyer takes one on the chin but keeps coming.

It looks like Rocky Blyer has been cut.
The fight stays on the outside here - PoopyPants looks like he's thinking about clinching though.
PoopyPants throws a body shot but no joy.
PoopyPants tries to clinch up against the cage, rushing in to close the distance. Blyer manages to break the clinch and circles back to the middle of the mat.
PoopyPants looks to score with a jab to the body but Blyer is just out of range.
PoopyPants tries to clinch up but Blyer circles away and keeps his distance.
Blyer swings away with a body shot that misses
and PoopyPants counters nicely by changing levels and landing a hook to the body.
PoopyPants scores with a jab to the body.
PoopyPants misses with a telegraphed body shot
and Blyer counters with a crisp hook to the side of the head.
Blyer's hands are dropping dangerously low here and PoopyPants connects clean with a right hook that sends him down to one knee! Blyer scrambles back to his feet.
PoopyPants tries to clinch but Blyer is having none of it.
Blyer now looks to counter with a shot at the body.
Blyer misses with an uppercut.
PoopyPants lands a slapping body shot.
A big right from Blyer misses.
PoopyPants scores with a nice strike.
Blyer scores with a punch to the head.

That's three minutes gone in the round.
PoopyPants fakes high and shoots in for a takedown but Blyer avoids it really well and circles away.
Blyer on the wrong end of a vicious looking body shot.
Blyer doesn't react quick enough there as he takes a shot to the body.
Blyer throws a nice looking combination but PoopyPants bobs and weaves to avoid any damage.
PoopyPants changes levels looking for a counter takedown but doesn't commit.
Nice uppercut there from Blyer.
PoopyPants takes a jab right on the kisser.

PoopyPants is rocked!
Nice defenses there by PoopyPants.
PoopyPants throwing a counter right hand but Blyer manages to avoid it.
Blyer tries to move into range but PoopyPants moves to the side and lands with a nice right hand.
PoopyPants uses good footwork to avoid the strikes from Blyer.
PoopyPants throws a poor cross that misses
and Blyer counters with a good right hand that lands right on the jaw.
Oh PoopyPants is still all over the place! His legs are completely gone! Will he be able to recover?!!
PoopyPants misses with a takedown
letting Blyer counter with a right hand.

That's four minutes gone in the round.
Fantastic stuff here - a very entertaining period of action, which has drawn cheers from the crowd.
Blyer lands a nice hook to PoopyPants's body. PoopyPants takes it in his stride and looks to land his own strikes.
A looping hook to the body misses from PoopyPants. Blyer does a little dance to reset his feet.
PoopyPants seems to have got his legs back now.
PoopyPants fails with an attempt to clinch.
PoopyPants is using his height advantage well here, landing a good percentage of his punches.
Blyer swings for the body but PoopyPants moves out of range.
Blyer uses some good footwork to avoid the body shot by PoopyPants.
Boom, another hit is landed. "You're gunna get knocked out" taunts Blyer, as that shot connected.
Blyer has been working his punching technique in the buildup to the fight and it appears to be paying off.
PoopyPants swings and misses with a hook to the body.
PoopyPants clobbers Blyer with an overhand right that has the crowd gasping. That made a horrendous noise.
Blyer might want to mix his strikes up a bit more. He's just going for head shots at the moment and that can become a bit predictable.
Blyer fails to land with a series of punches.
Blyer scores with a one two! PoopyPants had his feet all tangled up there and couldn't avoid the strikes.
PoopyPants takes a shot right to the bread basket.
PoopyPants takes a shot to the eye socket. That's gotta hurt.
The crowd applaud the fighters' efforts here as the round comes to an end.
PoopyPants throws a nice looking combination but Blyer bobs and weaves to avoid any damage.
Blyer takes a jab on the nose there. A little bit of blood seems to be coming out. Hopefully that won't affect his breathing.
PoopyPants looks for a takedown but Blyer sprawls well.
And that’s the end of the round – the fighters go back to their corners.

Rocky Blyer dominated that round.
The cut man is working on Rocky Blyer's cut.
The fighters' corners scream their final instructions, as the referee calls time. Here we go, back to the action!

Blyer lands a straight punch to the body, keeping PoopyPants at a distance.
Blyer lands a jab.
PoopyPants walks straight into an uppercut. Luckily it didn't land flush.

PoopyPants moves into the clinch.
Blyer tries to break the clinch but PoopyPants is controlling the position.

Blyer breaks the clinch and we're back to striking at distance.
PoopyPants paws at his opponent with the jab and then lunges in with a straight, right on the button.
Blyer tries to land with a swinging hook to the body but PoopyPants was well out of range. Poor timing from Blyer.

PoopyPants moves into range and clinches up with Blyer.
PoopyPants tries a shoulder strike but it doesn't do any damage.
PoopyPants tries for a takedown. No joy.
PoopyPants has Blyer pressed against the cage, preventing Blyer from circling away and getting back to striking at range.
PoopyPants tried to land a shot to the body but connects with Blyer's elbow.
Blyer blocks a body shot from PoopyPants.
Blyer stalling in the clinch.

That's one minute gone in the round.
PoopyPants misses with the head strike.
Blyer is trying to break the clinch but PoopyPants has him pressed against the cage.

PoopyPants ties up his opponent against the cage and manages to drag the fight down to the ground. PoopyPants no doubt will be looking to work submissions from his guard.
The fighters are pressed up against the cage, both looking to find a bit of space to work.

PoopyPants looking for submissions off his back, moving his hips, looking for an opening.
Blyer must be cautious of submissions here, given that his opponent has the superior Jiu Jitsu.
Blyer wants to stand but PoopyPants is controlling his posture from full guard.

PoopyPants looking for submissions from the bottom here. Moving his hips around, possibly looking for an armbar.

PoopyPants had isolated an arm as going for a kimura. Blyer defends it easily.
Blyer slows down the pace of the fight, as he sits in guard.

Blyer stands up from PoopyPants's guard - Blyer perhaps looking for a knockout.

That's two minutes gone in the round.
Blyer looks to land a combination but PoopyPants avoids it well.
Blyer shuffles to his left behind two crisp jabs. PoopyPants eats them both and turns towards Blyer to reposition himself and eats a stinging right hand-left hook combo.
Blyer throws a nice looking combination but PoopyPants bobs and weaves to avoid any damage.
PoopyPants tries to land with a swinging hook to the body but Blyer was well out of range. Poor timing from PoopyPants.
PoopyPants is looking to take this fight into the clinch.
Blyer tries to land with a swinging hook to the body but PoopyPants was well out of range. Poor timing from Blyer.
PoopyPants with a lazy takedown attempt
and Blyer counters with a nice jab to the body that keeps PoopyPants thinking.
Blyer cracks PoopyPants with a good shot that sees him stumbling back into the cage.
This is a great period of action - very entertaining stuff!
Blyer lunges in with swinging rights and lefts but PoopyPants circles away quickly and effectively.
PoopyPants keeps his opponent at a distance with a nice jab.
Blyer ducks under an overhand right and circles away with a smile on his face.
PoopyPants avoids the body shot from Blyer.

That's three minutes gone in the round.
Blyer cracks PoopyPants with an open hand slap.
A looping hook to the body misses from PoopyPants. Blyer does a little dance to reset his feet.
Blyer looks to land a combination but PoopyPants avoids it well.
Blyer swats away the attempt to clinch by PoopyPants.
Rocky Blyer is looking to throw some combinations by the looks of things.
PoopyPants misses with a double jab.
PoopyPants stooping low to avoid any incoming strikes and then lunges in with an uppercut come cross that lands flush.
PoopyPants tries to drive through with a takedown attempt but Blyer defends well and PoopyPants ends up having to push Blyer into the cage where they will battle it out in the clinch.
That's three failed takedown attempts in the round for BitchFace PoopyPants. That's going to take a lot out of him.
PoopyPants looks to clinch
enabling Blyer to counter with a crisp jab.
Blyer listening to his corner there, landing a nice uppercut.
PoopyPants looks up at the clock. Bad move! Blyer lands a right hand from hell, dropping PoopyPants. Blyer pounces and finishes the fight with a flurry of punches and elbows.

Ladies and gentlemen, after 3:44 of round 2, we have a winner by way of TKO (Strikes). Rocky Blyer!
In his post fight interview, Rocky Blyer started talking himself up. Luckily his charisma kept the crowd on side and gave him a good reception.