PBP Commentary

Coming up we have a featherweight MMA rules bout between Homer Simpson (ranked 0 p4p, 0 weight class) and John Mclovin (ranked 0 p4p, 0 weight class). Rumors backstage are that the fighters have been paid to keep it standing but we know that would never happen in MMA!

Simpson
vs
Mclovin

170 cm
44
156 lbs
51 - 26 - 0

167 cm
31
145 lbs
11 - 6 - 0

Good wrestling
World class boxer
Cardio machine

Olympic wrestler
Excellent boxer
Fast

KAISER Nutrition (160!/220$)
Bad Man Clothing (Nothing Over $40)

Ladies and gentlemen. This fight is 3 rounds, in the featherweight division.
Introducing the fighter to my left, fighting out of the red corner.
With a record of 51 - 26 - 0, fighting out of Montreal, Homer Simpson!
And introducing the fighter to my right, fighting out of the blue corner.
With a record of 11 - 6 - 0, fighting out of Montreal, John Mclovin!
The judges for this bout are Gregory Folan, Ian Loll and Elvis Blanc.

The bell rings for round one and we are underway!
Simpson throws a leg kick which misses Mclovin's front leg but catches the back leg as Mclovin tries to avoid it.
Simpson defending well as Mclovin loads up on a big left hand.
An inside leg kick from Mclovin misses.
Simpson is looking to counter punch.
Simpson just misses with a punch to the body.
Mclovin looks to land a right hand but Simpson moved out of range.
Oooooooooooh, not good. A low kick from Simpson lands where it shouldn't have, right in the... well, you know what he did? He kicked him in the penis. He's injured, injured bad. The referee sends both fighters to their corners and Mclovin has 5 minutes to recover. He's OK now though... a thumbs up from Mclovin and we're back underway with a touch of gloves.
A slapping leg kick lands for Simpson.
Simpson throws a body punch but Mclovin moves out of range.
Simpson misses with a jab and misses with a cross straight after too.
Simpson throws an ugly left hook that misses
and Mclovin counters with a straight right hand.
John Mclovin seems to be the more aggressive standup fighter in this bout.
Simpson throws a hook but Mclovin avoids it easily.
Simpson cracks Mclovin with a right hand to the side of the head.
We've had a slow start to the round here - hopefully the action picks up.
Simpson throws a hard body shot but it just misses.
Simpson misses with a hook. Mclovin ducked under it nicely.
A clash of legs there as Simpson blocks the low kick.
Simpson lands the left hand.
Mclovin swings and misses with a shot to the body
and Simpson counters with a leg kick.

That's one minute gone in the round.
Mclovin scores to the head and body with a nice combination!
Simpson blocks a jab.
Mclovin throws a leg kick
and Simpson counters with a leg kick.
Mclovin lands a jab to the nose.
Mclovin staying out of range there.
It seemed like Mclovin was going to counter with the hook but didn't fully commit to it.
Simpson thumps Mclovin with a low kick.
This fight brought to you by 5M nutrition - it's mmmmm tasty. Nice jab by Mclovin.
Simpson uses decent footwork to sidestep a right hand from Mclovin.
Simpson throws the kick towards the body but Mclovin avoids it.
Simpson misses with a telegraphed body shot
and Mclovin counters with a crisp hook to the side of the head.
Mclovin throws a body kick that misses.
Simpson is looking to counter punch.
Simpson avoids the head kick by Mclovin.
Mclovin uses good footwork to avoid the strikes from Simpson.
Mclovin tries to clinch
and Simpson cracks him with a counter punch right on the button.
We've seen a great period of action over the last minute or so - credit to both fighters for going all out!
Simpson thows a body kick. Mclovin tries to catch it but that hurt him.

That's two minutes gone in the round.
Simpson buckles his opponent's knee momentarily with a nice leg kick.
Mclovin takes a jab right on the kisser.
Mclovin misses with a series of wild punches.
Simpson has his hands up protecting his head but a hook from Mclovin finds it's way round the side to connect with Simpson's head.
Nice body punch from Simpson.
Mclovin throws a right hand that misses
and Simpson counters with a nice leg kick.
Simpson connects with a single shot there.
Simpson looks to score with a jab to the body but Mclovin is just out of range.
Simpson with a nice cross.
Simpson slips in close and lands a nice hook before moving back out of range.
Mclovin ducks under an overhand right and circles away with a smile on his face.
A big left from Mclovin misses.
Simpson looking to take his opponent's legs away with the low kicks.

That's three minutes gone in the round.
Simpson lands with a nice low kick. That'll leave a bruise.
Mclovin blocks a jab.
Mclovin throws a chopping leg kick but Simpson manages to avoid taking any serious damage.
Mclovin moves in looking to clinch but Simpson pushes him off.
Mclovin misses with a right hand
and Simpson cracks him with a counter punch right on the button.
Mclovin fails with an attempt to clinch.
Mclovin throws a lazy right hand but Simpson sees it coming a mile off and sidesteps it easily.
Simpson throws an overhand right that lands on Mclovin's shoulder, as Mclovin tries to avoid the shot.
A jab from Mclovin misses.
A little feinted left hand from Simpson on the counter but he doesn't commit to it.
Simpson ducks under an overhand right and circles away with a smile on his face.
Simpson swings for the body but Mclovin moves out of range.
Mclovin throws a hook to the side of Simpson's head but Simpson sees it coming and ducks under it beautifully.
Mclovin looks to land a combination but Simpson avoids it well.
Mclovin's leg has a nasty welt from taking a succession of leg kicks. That must be slowing him down.
Simpson lands a jab to the head.
Simpson lands a leg kick. The shin dug right into the meat of the thigh.
Simpson is really peppering his opponent's head with punches.

That's four minutes gone in the round.
Mclovin scores with a shot to the body.
Mclovin takes a punch to the jaw and another one to the bread basket.
We've seen a great period of action over the last minute or so - credit to both fighters for going all out!
A decent looking cross lands there for Mclovin.
Mclovin walks into a jab.
Simpson throws a series of punches but Mclovin avoids them all with ease.
Mclovin misses with a hook. Simpson ducked under it nicely.
Mclovin cracks Simpson with a hook to the jaw. Both fighters smile at eachother and high-five before getting back down to business.
A nice inside leg kick there by Simpson. That's going to slow Mclovin down.
Simpson turns his hip over beautifully as he lands a nice leg kick.
Good exchange - Simpson coming out on top.
Simpson misses the jab.
Mclovin has tried to improve his agility in the runup to this fight.
The crowd applaud the fighters' efforts here as the round comes to an end.
Simpson works over Mclovin's head and body with a nice combination.
Simpson thumps Mclovin with a low kick.
Mclovin throws a right hand that misses
and Simpson counters with a straight punch to the midsection.
Mclovin misses with a lunging right hand
and Simpson counters with a solid body kick.
And that’s the end of the round – the fighters go back to their corners.

Homer Simpson dominated that round.
That's the end of the round. The referee orders the cornermen out of the cage so we can get back down to business.

Mclovin misses the shot to the body.
Mclovin lands a jab.
Simpson lands with a kick to the ribs.
A big left from Simpson misses.
Simpson throws a lazy right hand but Mclovin sees it coming a mile off and sidesteps it easily.
Mclovin scores with a nice one two combo and darts back out of range to avoid anything coming in the opposite direction.
Mclovin on the receiving end of a decent leg kick there by Simpson. Simpson obviously looking to wear him down.
A looping hook to the body misses from Simpson. Mclovin does a little dance to reset his feet.
Simpson staying out of range there.
We've had a slow start to the round here - hopefully the action picks up.
A solid leg kick lands there for Simpson.
A cross from Mclovin lands.
Simpson pushing out the jab but it's not landing.
Mclovin tries to land with a swinging hook to the body but Simpson was well out of range. Poor timing from Mclovin.
Mclovin misses with a body kick.
Homer Simpson is winning the standup battle so far.

That's one minute gone in the round.
Simpson misses with a low kick.
Mclovin throws a jab but it's blocked by Simpson.
Both these guys seem content to just stand up and trade with eachother but Mclovin might want to think about changing up his gameplan a bit because over the course of the fight, Simpson has got the better of the exchanges.
Simpson fakes with a right hand and throws a good leg kick, right into the thigh. That had to hurt Mclovin.
Mclovin throws a lazy uppercut
and Simpson counters with a thumping low kick.
Homer Simpson is looking to keep the fight on the feet at all costs.
The crowd cheers as Mclovin lands an impressive looking overhand right. Simpson doesn't seem phased though.
Mclovin throws out a loose jab but Simpson uses good head movement to avoid it.
Simpson misses with a hook. Mclovin ducked under it nicely.
Simpson throws a hook but Mclovin avoids it easily.
Simpson fakes with a right hand and throws a good leg kick, right into the thigh. That had to hurt Mclovin.
Simpson throws an uppercut from half a mile away. Mclovin sees it coming and avoids it easily.
Simpson with a body punch. A glancing blow.
Simpson misses the jab.
A low kick from Simpson is predictable there
and Mclovin connects with a straight left hand counter down the middle.
Simpson cracks a nice hook into Mclovin's ribs.
Simpson connects with a good right hand that stumbles Mclovin. Mclovin circles away out of range and recomposes himself.

That's two minutes gone in the round.
The crowd cheering loudly, showing their appreciation for the quality fight we're seeing here.
Mclovin misses with a jab to the body
and Simpson counters with a nice low kick that buckles Mclovin's knee momentarily.
Simpson is really dominating this fight. Is there anything that Mclovin can do to turn this around?
Simpson displays some good footwork, moving neatly out of range as Mclovin throws out the jab.
Mclovin throws a shot from downtown. Simpson moves away and avoids it.
A telegraphed right hand from Mclovin misses the target.
A slapping leg kick lands for Simpson.
Nice uppercut lands for Mclovin. That snapped Simpson's head back.
Simpson lands a nice leg kick that just misses Mclovin's sensitive parts.
Simpson swings wildly with a right hand that was never going to find it's target.
Mclovin rushes forward with a series of wild hooks but Simpson moves out of range and avoids them all easily.
Simpson was looking to counter that move with a punch but didn't quite pull the trigger.
Simpson is looking to land body kicks.
Simpson scores with a hook.
A nice leg kick lands there from Simpson.
Nice defenses there by Simpson.
Mclovin looks to score with a jab to the body but Simpson is just out of range.

That's three minutes gone in the round.
Ouch! a nice leg kick from Simpson, right into the meat.
A punch lands to the side of Mclovin 's head but he takes it in his stride.
Mclovin tries to land a leg kick but Simpson saw it coming and moves away.
That kick from Simpson tenderised Mclovin's leg. Mclovin is trying to keep his angry face on.
Simpson throws a hook but Mclovin avoids it easily.
Mclovin throws a poor cross that misses
and Simpson counters with a leg kick.
Simpson throws a big shot that misses.
Mclovin takes an uppercut right on the button but keeps his composure.
A nice inside leg kick there by Simpson. That's going to slow Mclovin down.
Mclovin wants to clinch up but Simpson keeps it at a distance.
Simpson fires out a quick counter leg kick but Mclovin just manages to avoid it.
Nice cross by Simpson.
Mclovin closes the distance and lands a one-two.
Mclovin shoots in for a takedown but doesn't get it.
This is a great period of action - very entertaining stuff!
Simpson throws a monster uppercut resembling something out of street fighter but it doesn't land.

That's four minutes gone in the round.
Mclovin misses with a jab to the body
and Simpson counters with a nice body kick.
Mclovin throws a body shot but no joy.
Simpson fires out a quick counter leg kick but Mclovin just manages to avoid it.
Simpson dances in quickly and lands a nice inside leg kick on Mclovin. That did some damage!
Mclovin steps to the side to avoid the strikes from Simpson.
Simpson feints with a shoulder and throws a nice leg kick to Mclovin's calf.
Simpson lands a leg kick that knocks Mclovin off balance momentarily.
Mclovin throws a hook to the side of Simpson's head but Simpson sees it coming and ducks under it beautifully.
Simpson fires out a quick counter leg kick but Mclovin just manages to avoid it.
Mclovin ducks down and throws a hook to the body but Simpson moves away.
An inside leg kick lands from Simpson.
Mclovin waving his hands out in front of him, looking to distract Simpson.
Simpson lands with a thumping leg kick.
Mclovin showing good head movement there, avoiding the strikes from Simpson.
Good work by Mclovin as he checks the leg kick.
Simpson misses with a right hand
and Mclovin counters with a crisp hook to the side of the head.
And that’s the end of the round – the fighters go back to their corners.

Homer Simpson dominated that second round.
The corners get their ten second warning. Both fighters stand from their stools and stare eachother down, ready to get back to the action. Ladies and gentlemen, this is the final round!

Mclovin tries a head kick but it misses.
Mclovin walks forward, straight into a front kick from Simpson.
Mclovin walks into a left hand.
Mclovin ducks under a wild hook from Simpson.
Mclovin throws a right hand that misses
and Simpson counters with a quick right hand to the jaw.
That kick from Simpson tenderised Mclovin's leg. Mclovin is trying to keep his angry face on.
Simpson moves away from the strike by Mclovin.
Simpson lands a beauty of a right hand that gets the crowd cheering.
Mclovin takes a body punch but keeps moving.
Mclovin tries to check a leg kick but that clearly hurt him.
A nice inside leg kick there by Simpson. That's going to slow Mclovin down.
Simpson throws a hook to the side of Mclovin's head but Mclovin sees it coming and ducks under it beautifully.
Mclovin keeping a good distance there, avoiding the body shot.
Simpson tries to land with a swinging hook to the body but Mclovin was well out of range. Poor timing from Simpson.
Simpson tries a low kick but Mclovin avoids it.

That's one minute gone in the round.
Mclovin walks into a jab.
Mclovin fails with a takedown attempt.
Simpson swings away with a body shot that misses
and Simpson takes a counter punch right on the button for his troubles.
Mclovin wants to clinch.
Nice shot by Simpson.
Crunch! Simpson slams his shin into Mclovin's torso.
Mclovin has a pretty nasty looking mouse under his right eye.
Simpson blocks a jab.
Nice defenses there by Simpson.

That's two minutes gone in the round.
Simpson scores with a one two! Mclovin had his feet all tangled up there and couldn't avoid the strikes.
Mclovin throws a poor cross that misses
and Simpson counters with a quick right hand to the jaw.
Mclovin has developed a nice purple lump on his ribcage, as a result of some heavy body kicks from Simpson.
Simpson throws a shot from downtown. Mclovin moves away and avoids it.
A countering left hand to the body from Mclovin misses.
Mclovin tried to score with a low kick but Simpson checks it.
Mclovin wants to clinch but Simpson slips to the side
and Simpson counters with a leg kick that reverborates around the arena.
Fantastic stuff here - a very entertaining period of action, which has drawn cheers from the crowd.
Mclovin darts in and out, connecting with a jab.
Simpson fakes with a right hand and throws a good leg kick, right into the thigh. That had to hurt Mclovin.
Simpson looks to score with a jab to the body but Mclovin is just out of range.
It seemed like Mclovin was going to counter with the hook but didn't fully commit to it.
Mclovin wants to slow Simpson down by chopping away at his legs.
Simpson throws a poor cross that misses
and Mclovin counters with a straight right hand.
Mclovin moves away from the strike by Simpson.
Mclovin drops down looking to force a counter takedown but Simpson defends it well.
Simpson scores with a hook.
Mclovin takes an uppercut right on the button but keeps his composure.
Mclovin takes a shot right to the liver - Bas would have been proud of that punch.

That's three minutes gone in the round.
Simpson throws a shot from downtown. Mclovin moves away and avoids it.
Mclovin throws a body shot but no joy.
Simpson appeared to be looking to counter that last move with a leg kick.
Like a baseball bat into the meat of his leg there - nice leg kick by Simpson.
Donk. Mclovin catches Simpson right on the button with a cross.
Simpson takes a big uppercut there. He seems a bit wobbly but no, he's OK.
Simpson looking to take his opponent's legs away with the low kicks.
Mclovin throws a head kick that misses.
John Mclovin has stepped it up - he knows he needs a finish here!
Good exchange - Simpson coming out on top.
Simpson cracks Mclovin with an open hand slap.
Simpson throws a nice inside leg kick.
Simpson blocks a jab.
Simpson tried to counter with a leg kick but Mclovin avoided it.
Simpson moves into range and connects with a jab.
Mclovin lunges in with swinging rights and lefts but Simpson circles away quickly and effectively.
Simpson is looking to counter punch.
Mclovin takes a big intake of breath there - he's definitely tired.

That's four minutes gone in the round.
Mclovin misses with a hook
and Simpson connects with a straight left hand counter down the middle.
This has been an exciting period of action!
A big right from Simpson misses.
A little jabbing left from Mclovin on the counter but it doesn't find it's target.
Mclovin lands a pitter patter jab to the forehead of his opponent.
Mclovin throws the left hand but Simpson avoids the punch easily.
Simpson dances in quickly and lands a nice inside leg kick on Mclovin. That did some damage!
Mclovin keeping a good distance there, avoiding the body shot.
Mclovin slips a straight right by Simpson.
Simpson swings away but doesn't land with a series of punches.

Mclovin fakes a strike and closes the distance, dragging Simpson to the ground. Mclovin is now in Simpson's guard.
Simpson is looking to stand up but Mclovin isn't so interested in that idea.
Simpson wants to sweep here but Mclovin controlling him for the moment.
Simpson lands a beautiful sweep and he's now moved into his opponent's guard.

And that's the end of the fight!
Homer Simpson showed his dominance in that final round.
Well I reckon that's a shut out for Simpson, winning every round. Will the judges agree? They are the ones who matter, even if they are often depressingly incompetent. Over to the ring announcer for the scorecards.

Ladies and gentlemen, after 3 rounds of action, we go to the scorecards for a decision.
Judge Gregory Folan scores the fight 30:27
Judge Ian Loll scores the fight 30:27
Judge Elvis Blanc scores the fight 30:27

In favor of your winner, by unanimous decision... Homer Simpson!
A very excited looking Homer Simpson made sure he remembered to thank all the fans both in the arena and on the internet. He said all the coolest people spend all day on MMA websites, which got a big reaction.