PBP Commentary

Coming up we have a heavyweight MMA rules bout between Kim Jong Un (ranked 0 p4p, 0 weight class) and Bubba James (ranked 0 p4p, 0 weight class). Jong Un's ring entrance music is that housewives' favourite, DPRKorean National Anthem. James has chosen Biscuits & Gravy as his entrance music. Over to our ring announcer for the fighter introductions!

Jong Un
vs
James

178 cm
29
232 lbs
10 - 13 - 0

188 cm
32
272 lbs
10 - 17 - 0

BJJ Brown Belt
Counter fighter
Experienced

Decent wrestler
Decent boxing
Solid chin

Ladies and gentlemen. This fight is 3 rounds, in the heavyweight division.
Introducing the fighter to my left, fighting out of the red corner.
With a record of 10 - 13 - 0, fighting out of Amsterdam, Kim Jong Un!
And introducing the fighter to my right, fighting out of the blue corner.
With a record of 10 - 17 - 0, fighting out of Helsinki, Bubba James!
The judges for this bout are Marco Blurström, Tarja Halkonen and Matti Vanhoillinen.

The bell rings for round one and we are underway!
James looks to land a combination but Jong Un avoids it well.
Jong Un misses with a takedown attempt. He shot from a bit too far out.

James closes the distance and clinches.
James lands with a good tight uppercut to the head.
James stops a takedown attempt from Jong Un.
Jong Un has a body lock and is looking for a takedown. James is bouncing around trying to prevent the takedown and somehow he has indeed managed to stay on his feet.
That's three failed takedown attempts in the round for Kim Jong Un. That's going to take a lot out of him.
James missing with knees to the body.

James escapes the clinch and we're back to striking.
James slaps away a takedown attempt from Jong Un, before circling back to the center of the mat.
James misses with an attempted mid kick.
Jong Un misses with a takedown attempt. He shot from a bit too far out.

James decides to change it up a bit and drives through with a nice takedown into half guard.
The referee must be thinking about standing these guys back up.
Jong Un is trying to get back to full guard.
The fighters are pressed up against the cage, both looking to find a bit of space to work.

That's one minute gone in the round.
James lands with a punch from half guard.
Jong Un avoiding damage under a succession of punches from James.
James missing with the ground and pound from half guard.
James thows a wild elbow that connects with the canvas.
James throwing shots but they're hitting the canvas more than the man.
Jong Un is trying to stand back up but James is controlling him
James is looking to advance position but Jong Un won't allow it.
Jong Un wants to get back to his feet.
James is scoring with some nice ground and pound from the dominant position.
Nice strikes from James there.
The crowd cheering loudly, showing their appreciation for the quality fight we're seeing here.
Ground and pound from James.
James working the head and body with strikes.
The referee walks around the fighters to get a better view of the action. James lands a nice short elbow.
Jong Un trying to hold on to James's head to control him but James postures up.
James stops Jong Un from getting back to his feet.

That's two minutes gone in the round.
James is stalling here. Jong Un is in no mood to hang around though. He's locked up a kimura from the bottom! James seems to be keeping calm but he's forced to roll out of the hold and Jong Un has ended up in side control on the top. Nice work.
James really doesn't want to stay on the ground with Jong Un. If he can't get it back to his feet, it's only a matter of time before he'll be tapping out.
Jong Un wants to lay and pray for a moment but James keeps working.
James wants to get back to his feet.

James is trying to stand and escape here. He's got onto all fours but that's just let Jong Un take his back! Uh oh - Jong Un has got a rear naked choke here! James is forced to tap! It's all over! One monent is all it takes in this sport!

Ladies and gentlemen, after 2:52 of round 1, we have a winner by way of Submission (RNC). Kim Jong Un!
A victorious Kim Jong Un thanked his army of followers in his post fight interview, telling people to make sure they follow him on Twitter.