PBP Commentary

Coming up we have a heavyweight MMA rules bout between Greg Joll (ranked 0 p4p, 0 weight class) and Kim Jong Un (ranked 0 p4p, 0 weight class). Joll's ring entrance music is that housewives' favourite, ACDC - ThunderStruck. Jong Un has chosen DPRKorean National Anthem as his entrance music. Both fighter's entrance songs getting the crowd jumping here.

Joll
vs
Jong Un

175 cm
26
265 lbs
4 - 5 - 0

178 cm
29
224 lbs
8 - 13 - 0

BJJ Purple Belt
Counter fighter
Good chin

BJJ Brown Belt
Basic striking
Determined

Ladies and gentlemen. This fight is 3 rounds, in the heavyweight division.
Introducing the fighter to my left, fighting out of the red corner.
With a record of 4 - 5 - 0, fighting out of Helsinki, Greg Joll!
And introducing the fighter to my right, fighting out of the blue corner.
With a record of 8 - 13 - 0, fighting out of Amsterdam, Kim Jong Un!
The judges for this bout are Roosa Järviläinen, Johanna Lukiainen and Marco Blurström.

The bell rings for round one and we are underway!
Joll keeps the fight on the outside.
Joll looks exhausted already! Oh dear, he should have come in in better shape than this!

A momentary lapse in concentration from Joll enables Jong Un to shoot in and score with a neat double leg. Joll manages to secure a closed guard as the fighters hit the mat.
The referee must be thinking about standing these guys back up.
Jong Un controls the pace of the fight for a moment.
Let's hope that Jong Un has the urge to step up the pace any second now because for the last 15 or 20 seconds he's just been holding on tight.
Jong Un cracks Joll with a solid left hand.
Joll preventing the ground and pound from doing any damage.
Jong Un is looking to work some ground and pound but Joll has wrist control.
Jong Un tries to stand but Joll is controlling from the bottom.
Jong Un has the superior BJJ but he's also working some ground strikes into his gameplan.
Joll keeping full guard, as Jong Un tries to pass.
Jong Un lands a couple of digs.
Jong Un is frustrating his opponent with some stalling tactics from top position.

That's one minute gone in the round.
It looks like Jong Un might be adopting somewhat of a lay and pray gameplan here, which I'm sure won't go down too well with the paying fans in attendance... Or the ring announcers come to think of it.

The ref stands the fighters back up. Kim Jong Un was stalling too much, according to the referee.
Jong Un scores with a nice looking left hook and follows it up with an uppercut!
Jong Un tries to clinch up against the cage, rushing in to close the distance. Joll manages to break the clinch and circles back to the middle of the mat.
Jong Un is looking to take this fight into the clinch.

Jong Un closes the distance and gets a trip takedown into side control. Joll quickly recovers to half guard.
Jong Un controlling the pace.

That's two minutes gone in the round.
Jong Un working over Joll with some ground and pound. Joll looks like he wants out of this position, which is understandable.
Jong Un trying to control the pace.
The fans in attendance giving it up for the two fighters, who have really let it all hang out in the last minute or so!

The ref calls for a clean break and stands the fighters back up. Kim Jong Un wasn't active enough on the ground.

Jong Un fakes an overhand right and shoots for a takedown. Joll sprawls well initially but Jong Un persists and gets the takedown into half guard.
Jong Un performing his best blanket impression for a moment.

That's three minutes gone in the round.

OK we're going to have a standup here. Kim Jong Un hasn't been effective enough on the ground and the referee wants a restart.
Jong Un throws a sloppy head kick and Joll moves out of range easily.

Jong Un closes the distance and presses his opponent up against the cage.

That's four minutes gone in the round.
Jong Un unloads a knee to the mid-section.
Jong Un's corner are urging him to control the action in the clinch for a moment, rather than mount any serious offense. I'm sure the crowd appreciate those instructions... not.

Jong Un gets double underhooks and manages to take the fight to the ground.
Jong Un forces his way into half guard.
The fighters are pressed up against the cage, both looking to find a bit of space to work.
The crowd are loving this. Great action here.
Jong Un tries to pass to full mount but Joll defends it.
Well, if Jong Un is going to just lie there, perhaps we should talk about what we're having for dinner tonight… I'm having a ham and pineapple pizza… Yum. Can't wait.
As the round comes to an end the crowd are showing their appreciation for a great round of action.
And that’s the end of the round – the fighters go back to their corners.

Kim Jong Un dominated that round.
The fighters' corners scream their final instructions, as the referee calls time. Here we go, back to the action!

Jong Un closes the distance and clinches.
Jong Un lands a knee to the head.
Jong Un lands a body shot in the clinch.
Jong Un tries to land a knee to the head but Joll blocks with his arms.
Jong Un lands a nice knee to the body.
This has been an exciting period of action!

Jong Un jumps guard and drags Joll to the mat. He's obviously going to be looking for submissions off his back.
Jong Un is trying to keep Joll in close.
Jong Un wants to control here, rather than go for any submissions from the bottom. At least for now.

Jong Un is working for submissions here. He's thrown up his legs looking for a triangle but Joll frees his head nicely. Oh but Jong Un has switched to an armbar! Joll is tapping furiously! Lovely submission there!

Ladies and gentlemen, after 1:56 of round 2, we have a winner by way of Submission (Triangle Armbar). Kim Jong Un!
A very excited looking Kim Jong Un made sure he remembered to thank all the fans both in the arena and on the internet. He said all the coolest people spend all day on MMA websites, which got a big reaction.
The defeated Greg Joll had this to say: 'You call this pain? Try sniffing a beach of sand while wearing budgie smugglers - now that is pain. '.