PBP Commentary

Coming up we have a super heavyweight MMA rules bout between This Bastard This Bastard (ranked 0 p4p, 0 weight class) and Patrik Send (ranked 0 p4p, 0 weight class). Patrik Send will no doubt be trying to keep this one on the feet, where he has a distinct advantage.

Bastard This Bastard
vs
Send

222 cm
30
293 lbs
9 - 9 - 0

223 cm
29
287 lbs
1 - 8 - 0

Decent wrestler
Brawler
Experienced

BJJ Blue Belt
Decent boxing
Knockout power

Ladies and gentlemen. This fight is 3 rounds, in the super heavyweight division.
Introducing the fighter to my left, fighting out of the red corner.
With a record of 9 - 9 - 0, fighting out of New York, This Bastard This Bastard!
And introducing the fighter to my right, fighting out of the blue corner.
With a record of 1 - 8 - 0, fighting out of Los Angeles, Patrik Send!
The judges for this bout are Jonathan Paton, John Kavanagh and Lou da Vinci.

The bell rings for round one and we are underway!
A punch combination from This Bastard misses.
Send tries to clinch up but This Bastard circles away and keeps his distance.
This Bastard throws a head kick that misses and slips in the process. He scrambles back to his feet and the fighters circle.
Send dives in and grabs This Bastard's left leg, looking for a takedown. This Bastard pushes down on Send's head and hops out.
This Bastard shoots in for a takedown. "Ole!" shouts Send as he jumps to the side.
Send pulls out of a head kick attempt.
Send wants to clinch but This Bastard slips to the side

and This Bastard counters with a takedown into side control.
The referee must be thinking about standing these guys back up.
Send is putting a lot of effort into getting back to his feet here.
This Bastard controlling the position.
Send manages to work his way to half guard, despite This Bastard's best efforts.

That's one minute gone in the round.
This Bastard looks towards his corner to check for any instructions. The corner give him nothing to work with, so he cracks Send with a short hammerfist. I guess that's as good as any advice he could get in this position.
Send is trying to maintain the position but This Bastard is very close to passing his half guard.
This Bastard is looking to take a break and control but Send is keeping him honest, looking to work from the bottom.
Neither fighter is being very active at the moment, with This Bastard in particular looking to stall.
The fighters are pressed up against the cage, both looking to find a bit of space to work.
Send works his way to full guard. Good work.
This Bastard not doing a lot at the moment. He'll have to show some more aggression or the fight will get stood up.
Send looking to control but This Bastard passes into half guard.

That's two minutes gone in the round.
Send is trying to stand up here but This Bastard is controlling him well.
This Bastard wants to pass to mount but Send is defending the position.
Send wants to control but This Bastard is keeping busy.
This Bastard stops Send from getting back to his feet.
This Bastard missing with some ground and pound from the half guard.

Send looking for submissions from an awkward position here.
Send controlling the position for now.

That's three minutes gone in the round.
Send is trying to maintain the position but This Bastard is very close to passing his half guard.
This Bastard tries to pass to full mount but Send defends it.
This Bastard trying to control the pace.

Neither fighter is doing enough for the referee's liking and he's decided to stand them back up.
Send throws a low kick but This Bastard moves out of range easily.
A punch combination from Send misses.
This Bastard fails to land the takedown.
Send stuffs the takedown.
That's three failed takedown attempts in the round for This Bastard This Bastard. That's going to take a lot out of him.

That's four minutes gone in the round.
This Bastard keeps the fight on the outside.
Send closes the distance and clinches up with This Bastard, looking for a takedown. Send pushes This Bastard against the cage but This Bastard circles to the side and manages to break the clinch.
Send tries for a takedown but This Bastard circles away easily

and This Bastard counters with a shoot takedown into half guard.
Send looks winded!
Send is trying to get back to full guard.
This is a great period of action - very entertaining stuff!
This Bastard thows a wild elbow that connects with the canvas.
Send trying to control but This Bastard postures up.
As the round comes to an end the crowd are showing their appreciation for a great round of action.
Still in half guard, This Bastard seems content to control.
And that’s the end of the round – the fighters go back to their corners.

This Bastard This Bastard dominated that round.
The fighters' corners scream their final instructions, as the referee calls time. Here we go, back to the action!

This Bastard misses with a straight left.
Send tries to score with a leg kick but it misses it's target.
This Bastard keeps the fight on the outside.
This Bastard stuffs the takedown attempt from Send. Send gets slowly back to his feet.
A really sloppy takedown attempt there from Send.
A head kick misses from This Bastard.
Send throws a head kick that misses.
This Bastard fakes high and swings low for a body shot but Send manages to avoid it.
This Bastard throws a wild body kick that Send sees coming a mile off.
Send doesn't manage to clinch there - This Bastard circles away.

That's one minute gone in the round.
Send fails with the takedown

and This Bastard counters by moving into the clinch. Good anticipation by This Bastard.
This Bastard This Bastard has stuffed three takedown attempts in the round now. That's going to take a lot out of Patrik Send.
With the two fighters working up against the cage, Send just misses with a elbow thrown towards This Bastard's brow.
Send working hard to break the clinch.

This Bastard manages to break the clinch.
This Bastard looks to land a right hand but Send moved out of range.
Send closes this distance looking for a takedown but This Bastard circles away.

This Bastard gets the takedown into side control.
Send is breathing heavily.
Send manages to get back to half guard.

This Bastard is thinking about going for an arm triangle but he can't free his leg.
This Bastard slows the pace down in half guard.

That's two minutes gone in the round.
This Bastard prevents Send from improving his position.

This Bastard is looking for a kimura but he's never going to get it from there.
Send is trying to stand up here but This Bastard is controlling him well.
The ref warns both fighters not to hold the cage as they work up against the meshing.
This Bastard wants to take a breather but Send is having none of it.

That's three minutes gone in the round.
Send trying to control here.
This Bastard wants to take a breather but Send is having none of it.
Send is trying to stand back up but This Bastard is controlling him

This Bastard is looking for an arm triangle, whilst trying to pass to side control. Send doesn't seem that keen to cooperate though. No luck this time This Bastard.
Send tries to regain full guard. Instead though, This Bastard has advanced to mount. Uh oh.
Send has given up his back here.

That's four minutes gone in the round.
Send tries to escape the position.

This Bastard working for a RNC but it's not happening just yet.
This Bastard tries to keep control of the position but Send is staying busy.
The crowd applaud the fighters efforts here as the round comes to an end.

This Bastard is looking for the choke from the back position but Send is controlling his hands well.
This Bastard is hanging on to Send's back as he tries to escape.
And that’s the end of the round – the fighters go back to their corners.

This Bastard This Bastard dominated that second round.
The fighters get back to their feet, the hooter sounds and we're back to the action! Ladies and gentlemen, this is the final round!

A punch lands to the side of This Bastard 's head but he takes it in his stride.
Send throws a series of punches but This Bastard moves out of range.

This Bastard shoots in for a takedown! He's got it and he's managed to land in side control! That's better than This Bastard was expecting from the takedown attempt, I'm sure!
This Bastard has knee on belly and now moves to full mount! Trouble for Send!
This Bastard postures up and cracks his opponent a couple of times before moving back into close ground control. Send looks a forlorn figure.
This Bastard wants to control but Send has made it back to half guard. Nice work.
This Bastard content to control rather than advance.
This Bastard trying to control from half guard but Send is working away.

That's one minute gone in the round.

This Bastard is working for submissions here but there's nothing on.
Send wants to improve his position but This Bastard is controlling well.
This Bastard is pressing down on Send's thigh, looking to free his foot. Send is holding on for now.

This Bastard is thinking about going for an arm triangle but he can't free his leg.

Send actively working from the bottom here.

That's two minutes gone in the round.

This Bastard seems to be looking for submissions.
This Bastard wants to pass the guard but Send is defending well.

Send looking for submissions from an awkward position here.

This Bastard is looking for a kimura here.

That's three minutes gone in the round.
This Bastard is figuring out what he wants to do next.
This Bastard stops Send from getting back to his feet.
Send is trying to get back to full guard.
This Bastard This Bastard overall seems to be getting the better of the ground position in the fight so far.
Send takes a big intake of breath there - he's definitely tired.
This Bastard performing his best blanket impression for a moment.

That's four minutes gone in the round.

The referee decides to stand the fighters back up, due to lack of activity on the part of This Bastard This Bastard.
The crowd cheers as Send lands an impressive looking overhand right. This Bastard doesn't seem phased though.
The crowd applaud the fighters efforts here as the round comes to an end.

This Bastard clinches up against the cage.

This Bastard drags the fight down to the ground.
Send wants to stand and escape but instead This Bastard has hit a sweep and he's now on top in guard.

And that's the end of the fight!
This Bastard This Bastard showed his dominance in that final round.
Well I reckon that's a shut out for This Bastard, winning every round. Will the judges agree? They are the ones who matter, even if they are often depressingly incompetent. Over to the ring announcer for the scorecards.

Ladies and gentlemen, after 3 rounds of action, we go to the scorecards for a decision.
Judge Jonathan Paton scores the fight 30:27
Judge John Kavanagh scores the fight 30:27
Judge Lou da Vinci scores the fight 30:27

In favor of your winner, by unanimous decision... This Bastard This Bastard!