PBP Commentary

Coming up we have a featherweight kickboxing rules bout between Eddie Brock (ranked 0 p4p, 0 weight class) and Sack Turds (ranked 0 p4p, 0 weight class). Sack Turds will no doubt be looking to use his reach advantage to good effect.

Brock
vs
Turds

162 cm
26
152 lbs
5 - 8 - 0

177 cm
25
155 lbs
4 - 3 - 0

Dangerous knees
Experienced

Great elbows
Heavy handed

Global Empire MMA Gear

Ladies and gentlemen. This fight is 3 rounds, in the featherweight division.
Introducing the fighter to my left, fighting out of the red corner.
With a record of 5 - 8 - 0, fighting out of Tokyo, Eddie Brock!
And introducing the fighter to my right, fighting out of the blue corner.
With a record of 4 - 3 - 0, fighting out of Tokyo, Sack Turds!
The judges for this bout are Kenichi Hosakawa, Shigeki Sano and Ren Mimura.

The bell rings for round one and we are underway!

Brock moves into the clinch successfully.
Turds blocks a knee to the body. He'll have a nicely bruised forearm in the morning.
Brock tries a shoulder strike but it doesn't do any damage.
Both fighters working to control the clinch.
Brock misses with a short punch on the inside.
Brock using the Thai plumb to throw knees but Turds has his back arched nicely, preventing the strike.
A real battle for position is taking place between these two warriors.
Turds swings wildly with an uppercut but Brock uses good head movement to avoid it.
Turds misses with a hook to the ribs.

That's one minute gone in the round.
Turds wants to break free but Brock has control.
Turds lands a nice shot to the body.
Nice body punch from Brock.
Turds misses with a shot to the kidneys.
Turds misses with some punches.
Turds blocks a punch to the side of the head.
With the two fighters working up against the ropes, Brock just misses with a elbow thrown towards Turds's brow.
Brock throws an elbow but it misses.

That's two minutes gone in the round.
Turds misses with an elbow strike.
Turds blocks a knee to the body. He'll have a nicely bruised forearm in the morning.
Brock trying to land knees to the body.
Brock tries to land knees in the clinch but Turds avoids the damage to the body.
Turds trying to control the position but instead, Brock has worked for underhooks and has pushed Turds into the ropes.
Turds swings wildly with an uppercut but Brock uses good head movement to avoid it.
Turds doesn't land with the attempted body shot.

That's three minutes gone in the round.
With the two fighters working up against the ropes, Brock just misses with a elbow thrown towards Turds's brow.
Turds is trying to slow down the pace of the fight but Brock is keeping busy.
Brock misses with the head strike.
Turds on the defensive, avoiding the knees to the body.
Brock missing with knees to the body.
Turds tries to stall but Brock uses the opportunity to gain a better position.
Brock misses with a knee strike.

That's four minutes gone in the round.
Brock lands a damaging elbow.
Turds managing to block the knees to the body from Brock.
Brock misses with a body punch.
Turds managing to block the knees to the body from Brock.
Brock is looking to score with knees to the body. Maybe he'll change it up and go body then head. Turds is defending well for now.
Brock misses with a body punch.
Brock tries to land a knee to the head but Turds blocks with his arms.
Brock swings wildly with an uppercut but Turds uses good head movement to avoid it.
Turds blocks an elbow strike from Brock.
And that’s the end of the round – the fighters go back to their corners.

Eddie Brock dominated that round.
That's time! Brock's corner gives him a slap on the ass as he gets ready to fight.

Brock has closed the distance and engaged Turds in a clinch.
Brock throws an elbow but it's blocked.
Turds looks like he'd prefer to be striking at range right now.
Turds managing to block the knees to the body from Brock.
Brock looking to throw knees to the head but Turds is blocking nicely.
Turds misses with the head strike.
Turds working aggressively here.
Turds lands an elbow inside that Brock shrugs off.
Brock tries to land a shot to the body but it's blocked.
Brock tries to land a knee to the body but he is off balance and Turds avoids it.

That's one minute gone in the round.
Turds prevents a body shot from Brock.
Brock keeps the fight in the clinch, despite Turds's efforts to push away.
Turds dodges an elbow strike from Brock.
Brock tries to throw a body punch but Turds avoids it by throwing Brock back against the ropes.
The fighters are starting to get sweaty, which will make takedowns a bit more tricky.
Brock is looking to score with knees to the body. Maybe he'll change it up and go body then head. Turds is defending well for now.
Brock using the Thai clinch to land knees to the body.
Brock misses with an elbow over the top.
Turds stalling in the clinch but Brock improves position.

That's two minutes gone in the round.
Brock lands an elbow just above Turds 's eye.
Brock throws a nice elbow but it doesn't land.
Knees to the body from Brock.
Brock blocks a punch to the side of the head.
Brock lands with a short head shot on the inside.
Turds trying to stall but Brock improves his position.
Brock misses with a knee to the head.
Brock blocks a knee to the body. He'll have a nicely bruised forearm in the morning.
Brock lands an elbow inside.

That's three minutes gone in the round.
Brock using the Thai plumb to throw knees but Turds has his back arched nicely, preventing the strike.
Turds dodges an elbow strike from Brock.
Knees in the clinch landing for Brock.
Brock lands a knee to the body.
Brock blocks the elbow strike.
Turds blocks a knee to the body. He'll have a nicely bruised forearm in the morning.
Brock digs a right hand into Turds's ribs. Those have got to be taking their toll on Turds's gas tank.
Brock misses with a knee to the head.

That's four minutes gone in the round.
Brock lands an uppercut.
Eddie Brock has scored more points in the clinch so far.
Brock utilising his Muay Thai to score with a knee to the body.
Brock lands a nice elbow.
Turds is trying to push Brock away but Brock has him pressed against the ropes, so he's going nowhere.
Brock crunches a lovely knee into Turds's ribcage.
Brock throws a punch but it's blocked by Turds.
Brock unloads a knee to the mid-section. Turds lets out a prehistoric sounding urrrrgh.
The crowd applaud the fighters efforts here as the round comes to an end.
Turds blocks a body shot from Brock.
And that’s the end of the round – the fighters go back to their corners.

Eddie Brock dominated that second round.
The minute break is over - no more time for sponges and pep talks - back to the action! The crowd applaud as we get ready to start the final round!

Turds misses with a low kick.
Brock misses with a looping right.
Turds scores with a leg kick.
Brock could do with losing a few pounds - he looks very soft around the mid section, to put it politely.
Turds misses with a straight right.
Brock on the wrong end of a decent looking cross there.
Turds misses with an uppercut
and Brock counters with a nice jab to the body that keeps Turds thinking.
Good leg kick by Turds there. It's the ones that make that thud noise that hurt and that was an almighty thud.
Turds throws a low kick but his opponent is out of range.
Brock walks into a stiff left hand from Turds.
Turds with a jab.
Turds takes a jab right on the nose. That must have hurt but he shrugs his shoulders and looks to return the favor.

That's one minute gone in the round.
Brock doesn't manage to clinch there - Turds circles away.

Brock closes the distance and pushes Turds back into the ropes.
Knees to the body from Brock.
Brock misses with a knee strike.
Brock missing with knees to the body.
Brock misses with the head strike.
Turds working aggressively here.
Turds throws a head punch that misses.
Sack Turds has stepped it up - he knows he needs a finish here!

That's two minutes gone in the round.
Brock unloads a knee to the mid-section. Turds lets out a prehistoric sounding urrrrgh.
Turds blocks a knee to the body. He'll have a nicely bruised forearm in the morning.
Brock misses with a hook to the ribs.
Brock misses with a knee to the head.
Brock avoids the elbow strike from Turds, against the ropes.
Brock misses the knee to the body. Nice hip positioning from Turds.
Brock tries to throw a body punch but Turds avoids it by throwing Brock back against the ropes.
Brock is looking to score with knees to the body. Maybe he'll change it up and go body then head. Turds is defending well for now.
Turds blocks an elbow strike.

That's three minutes gone in the round.
Turds dodges an elbow strike from Brock.
A head punch on the inside from Brock fails to land.
Turds misses with a shot to the kidneys.
Brock unloads a knee to the mid-section.
Brock lands a nice knee to the body.
Brock cracks Turds with a nice body shot.
Turds looks like he'd prefer to be striking at range right now.
Brock blocks an elbow strike.
Turds looking to slow down the pace here.

That's four minutes gone in the round.
Turds on the defensive, avoiding the knees to the body.
Turds takes a knee right on the jaw!
Knees to the body from Brock.
Brock using the Thai plumb to throw knees but Turds has his back arched nicely, preventing the strike.
Turds tries to land knees in the clinch but Brock avoids the damage to the body.
Brock tries to land a knee to the body but he is off balance and Turds avoids it.
The crowd applaud the fighters efforts here as the round comes to an end.
Turds takes an elbow to the temple.
Brock lands an elbow that stopped Turds in his tracks for a moment.
Eddie Brock is fighting for a decision here - he's started to take the cautious approach.
Brock blocks an elbow strike from Turds.

And that's the end of the fight!
That was a close round. You could make an argument for either fighter but I would give it to Eddie Brock.
Well I reckon that's a shut out for Brock, winning every round. Will the judges agree? They are the ones who matter, even if they are often depressingly incompetent. Over to the ring announcer for the scorecards.

Ladies and gentlemen, after 3 rounds of action, we go to the scorecards for a decision.
Judge Kenichi Hosakawa scores the fight 30:27
Judge Shigeki Sano scores the fight 30:27
Judge Ren Mimura scores the fight 30:27

In favor of your winner, by unanimous decision... Eddie Brock!
After the big win, Eddie Brock made sure to do all the important stuff like thanking his sponsors Global Empire MMA Gear and telling the interviewer how much he loves him.