PBP Commentary

Coming up we have a light heavyweight MMA rules bout between BitchFace PoopyPants (ranked 0 p4p, 0 weight class) and Lu Kuan (ranked 0 p4p, 0 weight class). Lu Kuan has the better chin. Will he look to stand and bang today?

PoopyPants
vs
Kuan

197 cm
22
222 lbs
4 - 0 - 0

194 cm
20
205 lbs
5 - 0 - 0

BJJ Blue Belt
Decent elbows
Insanely flexible

BJJ Purple Belt
Excellent MT
Granite chin

CEC Nutrition Q160 *Christmas Sale*

Ladies and gentlemen. This fight is 5 rounds, for the light heavyweight championship of the world!
Introducing the champion to my left, fighting out of the red corner.
With a record of 4 - 0 - 0, fighting out of Tokyo, BitchFace PoopyPants!
And introducing the challenger to my right, fighting out of the blue corner.
With a record of 5 - 0 - 0, fighting out of Amsterdam, Lu Kuan!
The judges for this bout are Colin Fotheringham, James Ackerman and William Gold.

The bell rings for round one and we are underway!

PoopyPants has closed the distance and engaged Kuan in a clinch.
PoopyPants avoiding damage as Kuan throws knees to the body.
Kuan with the Thai clinch. He's looking to land a big knee but he's not managed it this time.
Kuan jumps guard but PoopyPants stands there with Kuan around his waist. Kuan gives up and drops back to his feet. We remain in the clinch.
Kuan is looking to score with knees to the body. Maybe he'll change it up and go body then head. PoopyPants is defending well for now.
PoopyPants pushes Kuan back against the cage and lands a hook to the side of the head.
Kuan blocks the elbow strike.
A short uppercut from PoopyPants.
Kuan tries to circle away but PoopyPants has him pinned against the cage.
Kuan throws a head punch that misses.
Kuan blocks an elbow strike from PoopyPants.
Kuan wants to break the clinch but can't.
PoopyPants managing to block the knees to the body from Kuan.
A short uppercut from PoopyPants.
Kuan is trying to slow down the pace of the fight but PoopyPants is keeping busy.
PoopyPants throws a nice elbow but it doesn't land.
Kuan misses with a hook from the clinch.
PoopyPants lands an elbow inside that Kuan shrugs off.

It looks like Lu Kuan has been cut.
PoopyPants softening up his opponent with strikes, against the cage.
PoopyPants lands a right hand that snaps the head of Kuan backwards.

That's one minute gone in the round.
Kuan is looking to score with knees to the body. Maybe he'll change it up and go body then head. PoopyPants is defending well for now.
PoopyPants lands a nice uppercut.
PoopyPants lands with a right to the head.
PoopyPants avoiding damage as Kuan throws knees to the body.
PoopyPants lands an elbow that stopped Kuan in his tracks for a moment.
PoopyPants managing to block the knees to the body from Kuan.
PoopyPants lands a nice uppercut.
Kuan tries to land a knee to the body but he is off balance and PoopyPants avoids it.
Kuan throws a knee to the head but misses.
Kuan lands a good knee to the midsection. PoopyPants won't want to take too many of those.
Kuan using the Thai plumb to throw knees but PoopyPants has his back arched nicely, preventing the strike.
PoopyPants lands an elbow that stopped Kuan in his tracks for a moment.
The pace really dropping off here, momentarily.
PoopyPants scores with a nice hook to the head.
PoopyPants throws an elbow that misses.
Kuan tries to land a knee to the body but he is off balance and PoopyPants avoids it.
PoopyPants misses with an elbow strike.

That's two minutes gone in the round.
PoopyPants lands with a short head shot on the inside.
Wooooo! Give it up for these two warriors! They are putting on a show!
PoopyPants managing to block the knees to the body from Kuan.
PoopyPants on the defensive, avoiding the knees to the body.
With the fighters clinched against the cage, PoopyPants creates a bit of distance for himself and scores with a nice uppercut.
Kuan throws a knee to the head but misses.
PoopyPants misses with an elbow strike.
A short uppercut from PoopyPants.
Kuan trying to land knees to the body.
PoopyPants gets through Kuan's defenses to land a nice punch to the side of the head.

That has opened up Lu Kuan's cut even more.
Kuan takes an elbow to the temple.
The fighters are pressed against the cage, as the pace of the fight slows.
Kuan looks like he'd prefer to be striking at range right now.
PoopyPants content to slow the pace in the clinch.
PoopyPants throws an elbow that misses.
PoopyPants working some nice short punches in the clinch.
Kuan misses the knee to the body. Nice hip positioning from PoopyPants.
PoopyPants lands an elbow that stopped Kuan in his tracks for a moment.

That's three minutes gone in the round.
PoopyPants throws an elbow that misses.
PoopyPants lands an elbow inside.

The cut above Lu Kuan's eye is starting to cause him problems now.
Kuan avoids a wild elbow strike from PoopyPants.
PoopyPants scores with an uppercut up the middle.
Kuan blocks an elbow strike.
PoopyPants lands a nice elbow from the clinch.

Lu Kuan's cut is absolute horrible now. This looks like something out of a horror film with blood covering both fighters.
PoopyPants lands an uppercut.
Kuan is looking to break free of the clinch but PoopyPants has double underhooks.
Nice body punch from PoopyPants - that landed with a thud.
Kuan takes a shot to the head.
PoopyPants lands punches inside but they're not really causing much damage.

The referee calls the doctor in to look at Lu Kuan's cut. Oh no, the doctor has called an end to the bout!

Ladies and gentlemen, after 3:47 of round 1, we have a winner by way of TKO (Cut). BitchFace PoopyPants!
BitchFace PoopyPants retains his light heavyweight title!