PBP Commentary

Coming up we have a super heavyweight MMA rules bout between Snow Crash (ranked 0 p4p, 0 weight class) and Teijo Tarzan (ranked 0 p4p, 0 weight class). Both these guys have solid standup skills and neither is particularly fantastic on the ground, so let's hope for a nice standup war!

Crash
vs
Tarzan

205 cm
27
299 lbs
12 - 3 - 0

185 cm
26
300 lbs
13 - 5 - 0

Great wrestler
Solid boxing
KO power

Good wrestler
World class boxer
Good gas tank

Charlie Wang's Tattered Rags & 95% Laundry
Charlie Wang's Nutrition and 95 % Laundry

Ladies and gentlemen. This fight is 5 rounds, for the super heavyweight championship of the world!
Introducing the champion to my left, fighting out of the red corner.
With a record of 12 - 3 - 0, fighting out of Los Angeles, Snow Crash!
And introducing the challenger to my right, fighting out of the blue corner.
With a record of 13 - 5 - 0, fighting out of Los Angeles, Teijo Tarzan!
The judges for this bout are Timothy Bukovac, Don Winkell and Frank Antenori.

The bell rings for round one and we are underway!
Tarzan throws the left hand but Crash avoids the punch easily.
Tarzan misses with a jab and misses with a cross straight after too.
Tarzan misses with a straight left.
Crash scores with a sloppy right hand. Tarzan should have avoided that one.

It looks like Teijo Tarzan has been cut.
Tarzan throws a series of punches but Crash avoids them all with ease.
Crash explodes with a nice body kick and back out of range. Nice work.

Crash scores with a takedown into Tarzan's guard.
The ref warns both fighters not to hold the cage as they work up against the meshing.
Wooooo! Give it up for these two warriors! They are putting on a show!
If this pace continues, the referee will definitely step in and force a standup.
Crash throws a big right hand that misses.
Crash stops Tarzan from standing up.
Crash trying to land body shots but he keeps hitting the mat.
Crash in full guard, throwing the ground and pound. No damage this time.
Tarzan is looking to get back to his feet but can't, whilst Crash is controlling him.
Both fighters really going for it on the ground here!
Crash throwing shots from guard but he's hitting more mat than opponent.
Crash throws a big elbow that misses.
Crash trying to pass the guard but can't manage it just yet.
Crash will need to keep those long limbs tucked in whilst he's on the ground, to prevent any submissions.
Tarzan is looking to get back to his feet but can't, whilst Crash is controlling him.
Tarzan working the defensive guard well to avoid strikes from Crash.

That's one minute gone in the round.
Crash chips away with some ground and pound.
Crash loading up with the ground and pound but he's missing more than he's landing in this flurry.
Crash loading up with the ground and pound but he's missing more than he's landing in this flurry.
Crash postures up and lands some nice ground and pound.

Tarzan manages to escape and get back to his feet.
Crash ducks under a wild hook from Tarzan.
Crash looks to land a combination. Tarzan sees it coming but can only parry a couple of the shots.
Wooooo! Give it up for these two warriors! They are putting on a show!
Tarzan throws an off balance right hand
and Crash counters with a nice jab to the body that keeps Tarzan thinking.
Tarzan cracks Crash with a nice right hand that draws applause from the crowd.
Crash uses decent footwork to sidestep a right hand from Tarzan.
Tarzan does a little shimmy and throws a leg kick. The leg kick missed by a considerable margin though, making him look a little bit silly for doing the shimmy.
Tarzan throws the left hand but Crash avoids the punch easily.
Tarzan swings away but doesn't land with a series of punches.
Tarzan misses with a wild body shot.
Tarzan throws the left hand but Crash avoids the punch easily.

That's two minutes gone in the round.
Crash lands with a good body shot.
Tarzan looks gassed!
Crash connects with an inside leg kick.

Crash drops Tarzan with a left and a right! Oh, Tarzan is hurt - Crash dives into side control looking to finish!
Tarzan taking punishment in the form of punches.
Crash scores with a big shot from side control... and another... and another! Oh Tarzan is done here - save him referee! More strikes land and eventually the ref does step in and Crash can finally stop beating on his defenseless opponent!

Ladies and gentlemen, after 2:39 of round 1, we have a winner by way of TKO (Strikes). Snow Crash!
Snow Crash is the new super heavyweight champion!
A relieved looking Snow Crash thanked the fans for their support and gave the usual line about them being amazing. They seemed to believe that he actually meant it.