PBP Commentary

Coming up we have a heavyweight MMA rules bout between Harry Sonofabeetch (ranked 0 p4p, 0 weight class) and Yrjo Jarvinen (ranked 0 p4p, 0 weight class). Sonofabeetch comes to the cage accompanied by the theme from the x files. Jarvinen has chosen Frederik - Harva meistä on rautaa as his entrance music. Harry Sonofabeetch could well score a knockout today. He has the power to get to Yrjo Jarvinen's chin.

Sonofabeetch
vs
Jarvinen

200 cm
28
286 lbs
10 - 5 - 0

190 cm
26
253 lbs
15 - 7 - 0

Good wrestling
Excellent boxer
Granite chin

Good wrestler
Good low kicks
Good gas tank

Resistance

Ladies and gentlemen. This fight is 3 rounds, in the heavyweight division.
Introducing the fighter to my left, fighting out of the red corner.
With a record of 10 - 5 - 0, fighting out of Las Vegas, Harry Sonofabeetch!
And introducing the fighter to my right, fighting out of the blue corner.
With a record of 15 - 7 - 0, fighting out of Los Angeles, Yrjo Jarvinen!
The judges for this bout are Timothy Bukovac, and Don Winkell.

The bell rings for round one and we are underway!
Jarvinen slips under a jab from Sonofabeetch.

Jarvinen fakes a strike and closes the distance, dragging Sonofabeetch to the ground. Jarvinen is now in Sonofabeetch's guard.
The referee is asking the fighters to pick up the pace.
Sonofabeetch wants to stand and escape but Jarvinen is having none of it.
Jarvinen working some ground and pound from guard but it's not doing any damage.
Sonofabeetch wants to stand up but Jarvinen is controlling him.
Sonofabeetch keeping full guard, as Jarvinen tries to pass.
Sonofabeetch keeping moving, preventing Jarvinen from controlling successfully.
Jarvinen trying to pass the guard but can't manage it just yet.
Sonofabeetch preventing the ground and pound from doing any damage.

That's one minute gone in the round.
Jarvinen won't allow Sonofabeetch to get back to his feet.
Jarvinen working some ground and pound from guard but it's not doing any damage.
Jarvinen has the superior BJJ but he's also working some ground strikes into his gameplan.
Jarvinen trying to control but Sonofabeetch is working from the bottom.
Jarvinen lands a nice shot whilst sitting in his opponent's guard.

Sonofabeetch has his feet on Jarvinen's hips. He pushes off and gets to his feet. Nice work.
Jarvinen uses good footwork to get in and out and land a nice right hand before Sonofabeetch has time to react.

It looks like Harry Sonofabeetch has been cut.
Jarvinen avoids a punch combination nicely.
Jarvinen connects with a jab.
This is a great period of action - very entertaining stuff!
Jarvinen tries for a takedown but Sonofabeetch sees it coming a mile off and avoids it easily.
Sonofabeetch misses with a low kick.
Sonofabeetch uses some good footwork to avoid the body shot by Jarvinen.

That's two minutes gone in the round.
Sonofabeetch tries a switch kick but it misses it's target.
Jarvinen tries a head kick but it misses.
Sonofabeetch ducks under an overhand right and circles away with a smile on his face.

Jarvinen takes the fight into the clinch.
Sonofabeetch's head jolts backwards as he takes an uppercut right on the button!
Sonofabeetch tries for a takedown but Jarvinen manages to get underhooks.
Sonofabeetch misses with the head strike.
Sonofabeetch is looking for a takedown.

Jarvinen manages to break the clinch.
Sonofabeetch misses with a wild combination.
Sonofabeetch wants to clinch up but Jarvinen keeps it at a distance.
Sonofabeetch misses with a looping right.
A combination from Sonofabeetch does no damage.
Sonofabeetch moves his head to the side to avoid a jab but walks straight into a cross.
Sonofabeetch is breathing heavily.
Jarvinen looks to score with a jab to the body but Sonofabeetch is just out of range.
Sloppy strikes from Sonofabeetch. Those never looked like landing.

That's three minutes gone in the round.
Jarvinen lands a nice looking body kick.
Sonofabeetch walks into a stiff left hand from Jarvinen.

Harry Sonofabeetch's cut is getting worse.
Sonofabeetch keeping a good distance there, avoiding the body shot.
Like a baseball bat into the meat of his leg there - nice leg kick by Jarvinen.
Wooooo! Give it up for these two warriors! They are putting on a show!
Jarvinen thumps Sonofabeetch with a low kick.
Jarvinen darts in and out, connecting with a jab.
Jarvinen lunges at Sonofabeetch with a hook that half lands and is half blocked by Sonofabeetch's hand.
Jarvinen wants to clinch up but Sonofabeetch keeps it at a distance.
Good standup being displayed there by Jarvinen as he connects with a hook.

Harry Sonofabeetch's cut is bleeding quite badly. He's got to try and protect it.
Sonofabeetch on the receiving end of a decent leg kick there by Jarvinen. Jarvinen obviously looking to wear him down.
Jarvinen throws a body kick but he wasn't in range.
Jarvinen lands a nice looking body kick.
Jarvinen throws a nice inside leg kick.
Jarvinen scores with a spinning back kick!

Jarvinen sets himself and throws a head kick that knocks Sonofabeetch to the ground! Jarvinen dives into full mount looking to finish!

Sonofabeetch is rocked!
Jarvinen postures up and lands a whopping elbow - oh that's hurt Sonofabeetch bigstyle! Two more strikes land for Jarvinen and the fight is over!

Ladies and gentlemen, after 4:58 of round 1, we have a winner by way of TKO (Strikes). Yrjo Jarvinen!
A very excited looking Yrjo Jarvinen made sure he remembered to thank all the fans both in the arena and on the internet. He said all the coolest people spend all day on MMA websites, which got a big reaction.