PBP Commentary

Coming up we have a welterweight MMA rules bout between Chuck Norris (ranked 0 p4p, 0 weight class) and Huge Balls (ranked 0 p4p, 0 weight class). Balls has a pretty significant injury - he really shouldn't be fighting right now but he's a warrior and he's here none the less! There are an array of beautiful celebrities at ringside tonight! I wonder if any of them paid for their tickets.

Norris
vs
Balls

185 cm
20
184 lbs
0 - 0 - 0

197 cm
25
185 lbs
6 - 4 - 0

BJJ Purple Belt
Good kicks
Intelligent

Good wrestler
Counter striker
Powerful

Ladies and gentlemen. This fight is 3 rounds, in the welterweight division.
Introducing the fighter to my left, fighting out of the red corner.
With a record of 0 - 0 - 0, fighting out of Amsterdam, Chuck Norris!
And introducing the fighter to my right, fighting out of the blue corner.
With a record of 6 - 4 - 0, fighting out of Amsterdam, Huge Balls!
The judges for this bout are Daniel Blasius, Radbod Blank and Saam Ante.

The bell rings for round one and we are underway!
Norris pulls out of a head kick attempt.
Balls looks gassed!
Norris throws a head kick that misses.
A punch combination from Norris misses.
Chuck Norris seems to be the more aggressive standup fighter in this bout.
Norris misses with a jab and misses with a cross straight after too.
Balls avoids a punch combination nicely.
Balls on the wrong end of an overhand right that came out of nowhere.
No joy there for Norris, who threw a few shots but didn't land.
Norris fails to land with the punch combination there - jab, cross, hook, miss, miss, miss.
Norris motions for Balls to come forward. Norris throws a leg kick but it misses it's target.
Norris will need to tighten up his combinations if he doesn't want to gas himself out, swinging at thin air.
A head kick misses from Norris.
We've had a slow start to the round here - hopefully the action picks up.
Norris scores with a one two! Balls had his feet all tangled up there and couldn't avoid the strikes.

It looks like Huge Balls has been cut.
Norris throws a monster uppercut resembling something out of street fighter but it doesn't land.
Well, he's not going to score with shots like that. A lazy body kick attempt from Norris.

That's one minute gone in the round.
Norris throws a right and a left that both miss.
Norris slips under a jab.
Balls waving his hands out in front of him, looking to distract Norris.
Norris lands with a kick to the temple. Balls shrugs as if to say "is that all you've got?"
Norris staying out of range there.
Norris throws a series of punches but Balls avoids them all with ease.
Norris throws a one two combo.

Balls is rocked!
Norris misses with a wild body shot.
Norris lands a high kick!
Balls is still on wobbly legs! Can Norris finish him?
A head kick misses from Norris.
Balls seems to have recovered his senses.
Norris looks to land a body kick but Balls moved away.
Norris scores with a push kick.
This is a great period of action - very entertaining stuff!
Norris takes a step towards his opponent and connects with a left hand, before circling away.
Chuck Norris is looking to keep the fight on the feet at all costs.
Balls walks into a stiff left hand from Norris.

That's two minutes gone in the round.
Norris throws a sloppy head kick and Balls moves out of range easily.
Nice uppercut there from Norris.
Norris misses with a double jab.
Balls blocks a head kick by Norris.
Norris keeps Balls at a distance using the push kick.
Balls moves out of range of the strikes.
Norris throws a series of punches but Balls avoids them all with ease.
Balls is a painfully thin specimen of a man. You do wonder whether a good body kick would snap him clean in two.
Norris lands with a straight right. Balls didn't see that one coming.
Balls tries to check the leg kick but that clearly hurt him.
Balls staying out of range there.
Balls walks into a jab.
Norris throws an uppercut from half a mile away. Balls sees it coming and avoids it easily.
Norris throws an uppercut from half a mile away. Balls sees it coming and avoids it easily.

That's three minutes gone in the round.
Norris scores to the head and body with a nice combination!
Norris throws a quick head kick that skims the top of Balls's head.

That has opened up Huge Balls's cut even more.
Norris throws a right hand that Balls ducks under and follows up with a left that Balls also avoids with ease.
Norris throws a wild combination but nothing lands.
Thud! ouch! good body kick from Norris - that will leave a mark!
Norris throws a combination but it was largely blocked by Balls.
Balls rushes forward with a series of wild hooks but Norris moves out of range and avoids them all easily.
Norris misses with a half-hearted attempt at a head kick.
Balls showing good head movement there, avoiding the strikes from Norris.
Norris tries a head kick but it misses.
A head kick from Norris lands but Balls takes it in his stride.
Balls takes a body kick right on the floating rib. Ouchie.

That's four minutes gone in the round.
Norris misses with a head kick.
Norris lands with a slapping head kick.
Norris misses with the combination.
Norris misses with a half-hearted attempt at a head kick.
Norris misses with a two punch combination.
Balls throws a nice looking combination but Norris bobs and weaves to avoid any damage.
Norris connects nicely with a jab. Noted by the judges no doubt.
Balls on the wrong end of a decent looking cross there.
Norris looks to land a combination but Balls avoids it well.
The crowd applaud the fighters efforts here as the round comes to an end.
Norris throws a combination that misses
and Balls counters with a one-two to the body.
Norris rushes forward with a series of wild hooks but Balls moves out of range and avoids them all easily.
Norris lunges in with swinging rights and lefts but Balls circles away quickly and effectively.
And that’s the end of the round – the fighters go back to their corners.

Chuck Norris dominated that round.
The cut man is working on Huge Balls's cut.
The fighters get back to their feet, the hooter sounds and we're back to the action!

Norris throws a head kick that Balls semi-blocks.
Balls slips a jab and a cross from Norris.
Norris throws a head kick that misses.
Norris throws a head kick that misses.
Chuck Norris is looking to throw some combinations by the looks of things.
Norris throws out a powerful jab.
Balls missing with a left hand there. Norris was out of range so wasted energy throwing that one.
Norris throws a wild combination but nothing lands.
Balls takes a shot right to the liver - Bas would have been proud of that punch.
Norris chopping away at his opponent's legs.
Norris tries a head kick but it misses.
A decent looking body kick lands there for Norris.
Both fighters are absolutely exhausted here.
Norris pulls out of a head kick attempt.
Norris throws a body kick but he was well out of range there.

That's one minute gone in the round.
Norris tries a switch kick but it misses it's target.
Norris misses with a jab, cross combination.
Norris lands with a nice body kick.
Norris misses with a jab, cross combination.
Norris tries a switch kick but it misses it's target.
Norris throws a sloppy head kick and Balls moves out of range easily.
Norris misses with a double jab.
Norris fails to land with a series of punches.
Norris on the wrong end of a nice hook.
A head kick misses from Norris.
Norris lands a leg kick. The shin dug right into the meat of the thigh.
Norris misses with a body kick.
Norris misses with a few strikes there.

That's two minutes gone in the round.
Well. There's a bit of a lull in the action here and the crowd are starting to get restless.
Norris throws a right and a left that both miss.
Chuck Norris is winning the standup battle so far.
Norris misses with a half-hearted attempt at a head kick.
Norris misses with a head kick.
Norris tries a head kick but it misses.
Balls lands with a cross.
Norris throws a head kick but Balls moves out of range.
Norris misses with a jab and misses with a cross straight after too.
Norris misses with a double jab.
Balls throws a jab when Norris was well out of range.
Balls avoids a punch combination nicely.
A combination from Norris does no damage.
A telegraphed takedown attempt from Balls is defended easily by Norris.

That's three minutes gone in the round.
Norris misses with a double jab.
Norris lands with a kick to the temple. Balls shrugs as if to say "is that all you've got?"
Norris misses with a jab and misses with a cross straight after too.
Norris cracks Balls with a hook to the jaw. Both fighters smile at eachother and high-five before getting back down to business.
Norris uses good head movement to avoid the hook from Balls.
Norris lands a high kick!
Norris throws a head kick but Balls moves out of range.
Norris misses with a half-hearted attempt at a head kick.
Norris throws a nice head kick!
Norris throws a head kick that misses.

That's four minutes gone in the round.
Norris tries a head kick but it misses.
Norris finds nothing but air with that leg kick attempt.
Balls misses with a hook.
The fighters circling - Norris throws out the jab but it was never going to land.
Norris throws a nice head kick!
Norris throws a right and a left that Balls avoids nicely.
Norris misses with a double jab
and Balls counters with a three punch combo that has Norris backing up. Norris nods at Balls to acknowledge the strikes.
Balls tries to move into range but Norris moves to the side and lands with a nice right hand.
Norris misses with a two punch combination.
The crowd thankful this round is nearly over.
A head kick misses from Norris.
Norris throws a right hand that Balls ducks under and follows up with a left that Balls also avoids with ease.
Balls takes one on the chin but seems OK.
And that’s the end of the round – the fighters go back to their corners.

Chuck Norris dominated that second round.
The cut man is working on Huge Balls's cut.
OK. That's time! The bell goes and we're back to the action. This is the final round!

Balls avoids a punch combination nicely.
Norris tries a head kick but it misses.
Balls misses with a straight right.
Balls has developed a nice purple lump on his ribcage, as a result of some heavy body kicks from Norris.
Norris scores with a nice looking left hook and follows it up with an uppercut!
Norris throws a nice looking combination but Balls bobs and weaves to avoid any damage.
Norris lands with a slapping head kick.
Norris tries a head kick but it misses.
Balls scores with a decent looking hook.
Norris explodes with a nice body kick and back out of range. Nice work.
A head kick misses from Norris.
Balls blocks a head kick by Norris.
Norris throws a jab, cross combination which is slipped
and Balls counters with a good right hand that lands right on the jaw.

That's one minute gone in the round.
Norris throws a head kick that misses.
Both fighters are breathing heavily.
Balls showing good head movement there, avoiding the strikes from Norris.
Norris lands with a cross.
Norris throws a head kick that misses and slips in the process. He scrambles back to his feet and the fighters circle.
Norris throws a head kick that misses.
Norris throws a sloppy head kick and Balls moves out of range easily.
Norris throws a head kick that misses.
Norris throws a chopping leg kick but Balls manages to avoid taking any serious damage.
Balls might want to mix his strikes up a bit more. He's just going for head shots at the moment and that can become a bit predictable.
Norris looks for the body kick but Balls saw that one coming.
Norris throws a right hand that Balls ducks under and follows up with a left that Balls also avoids with ease.
Norris throws a combination but comes up with nothing but fresh air.
Norris pulls out of a head kick attempt.
Chuck Norris is fighting for a decision here - he's started to take the cautious approach.

That's two minutes gone in the round.
A few boos can be heard. I'm sure they will multiply if the fighters don't pick up the pace.
Balls connects with a jab.
A telegraphed right hand from Balls misses the target.
Norris misses with a jab, cross combination.
Norris throws a combination but comes up with nothing but fresh air.
Norris throws a sloppy head kick and Balls moves out of range easily.
Norris chopping away at his opponent's legs.
Jab, cross, leg kick. Nice combination by Norris!
Norris stalks Balls and leaps in with a furious combination of punches. Uppercuts and crosses smash into Balls's face. Balls staggers backwards, shaken.
Norris misses with a jab and misses with a cross straight after too.
Norris throws a head kick but Balls moves out of range.
Norris falls off balance throwing a combination
and Balls counters with a three punch combo that has Norris backing up. Norris nods at Balls to acknowledge the strikes.
Norris moves into range and lands a nice body kick.

That's three minutes gone in the round.
Balls throws a big shot that misses.
Norris misses with a head kick.
Balls keeping a good distance there, avoiding the body shot.
Norris sizes up Balls with a pawing jab and scores with a straight right down the middle.
Balls throws a nice looking combination but Norris bobs and weaves to avoid any damage.
Norris looks to land a combination. Balls sees it coming but can only parry a couple of the shots.
Norris throws a combination but it was largely blocked by Balls.
A punch combination from Norris misses.
Norris tries a switch kick but it misses it's target.
Norris fails to land with a series of punches.
Balls slips a jab and a cross from Norris.
Norris scores with a hook.
Norris lunges in with swinging rights and lefts but Balls circles away quickly and effectively.

That's four minutes gone in the round.
The crowd are showing their displeasure at the lack of action as loud boos ring out around the arena.
Some wild striking there from Norris.
Huge Balls has stepped it up - he knows he needs a finish here!
Norris uses decent footwork to sidestep a right hand from Balls.
Balls moves out of range of the body kick.
Norris scores with a straight right hand, right through his opponent's guard.
Balls has a pretty nasty looking mouse under his right eye.
A punch combination from Norris misses.
Balls takes a head kick and keeps coming.
Norris lands with a nice combination. Balls backs away looking to recover.
A head kick misses from Norris.
Norris goes for a high kick. It partially lands.
A jab from Norris misses.
Norris lands a jab, followed by a cross and another cross, as Balls backs up against the cage.
Balls blocks a head kick by Norris.

And that's the end of the fight!
Chuck Norris showed his dominance in that final round.
Well Norris has outscored his opponent in every aspect of the fight today. Only a scarily incompetent judge or two will keep him from a well deserved win... Over to the ring announcer for the scorecards.

Ladies and gentlemen, after 3 rounds of action, we go to the scorecards for a decision.
Judge Daniel Blasius scores the fight 30:26
Judge Radbod Blank scores the fight 30:26
Judge Saam Ante scores the fight 30:26

In favor of your winner, by unanimous decision... Chuck Norris!