PBP Commentary

Coming up we have a heavyweight MMA rules bout between Crotch Grabber (ranked 126 p4p, 19 weight class) and Patrick Thompson (ranked 113 p4p, 14 weight class). Grabber comes into the arena with They say that I'm Crazy blaring out of the sound system. There are an array of beautiful celebrities at ringside tonight! I wonder if any of them paid for their tickets.

Grabber
vs
Thompson

207 cm
30
278 lbs
23 - 4 - 0

193 cm
27
270 lbs
16 - 10 - 0

Abu Dhabi Champ
World class boxer
Insanely flexible

Good wrestler
World class boxer
Good gas tank

UnderGround Clothing Co.
Urban Fighter

Ma Balls Is Hot Clothing
UnderGround Clothing Co.

Ladies and gentlemen. This fight is 3 rounds, in the heavyweight division.
Introducing the fighter to my left, fighting out of the red corner.
With a record of 23 - 4 - 0, fighting out of Las Vegas, Crotch Grabber!
And introducing the fighter to my right, fighting out of the blue corner.
With a record of 16 - 10 - 0, fighting out of Los Angeles, Patrick Thompson!
The judges for this bout are Timothy Bukovac, Don Winkell and .

The bell rings for round one and we are underway!
Thompson connects nicely with a jab. Noted by the judges no doubt.
Grabber throws an off balance right hand
and Thompson counters with a nice uppercut.
Grabber scores with a hook to the body. Thompson takes a step back and tries to catch his breath.
A looping hook to the body misses from Thompson. Grabber does a little dance to reset his feet.
Thompson is moving around nicely and scores here with a single head shot.
Grabber misses with a low kick.
A head kick by Grabber misses
and Thompson connects with a straight left hand counter down the middle.
Grabber digs a good hook to Thompson's body.
Grabber throws an ugly left hook that misses
and Thompson cracks him with a counter punch right on the button.
Grabber throws a head kick that misses and slips in the process. He scrambles back to his feet and the fighters circle.
Thompson swings away with a counter right hand but no contact made.
Grabber fails to land with the punch combination there - jab, cross, hook, miss, miss, miss.
A little jabbing left from Thompson on the counter but it doesn't find it's target.
The crowd are loving this. Great action here.
Grabber misses with a shot to the body
letting Thompson counter with a right hand.
Grabber keeps the fight on the outside.
Grabber throws a big shot that misses.
Thompson misses with a hook. Grabber ducked under it nicely.
Grabber fakes a head shot and lands one to the body.

That's one minute gone in the round.
Grabber lands a nice shot to the body.
Thompson lands a vicious shot with the stealth of a sniper and the strength of a viper. Are vipers that strong? I can think of lots of things that are stronger than a viper - not many rhyme with sniper though.
Grabber goes for a high kick. It partially lands.
Grabber throws a quick head kick that skims the top of Thompson's head.
Grabber staying out of range there.
Grabber plants his feet and lands a nice head kick!
Thompson fakes high and swings low for a body shot but Grabber manages to avoid it.
Thompson takes a jab right on the kisser.
Thompson tries to clinch but Grabber is having none of it.
Thompson lunges at Grabber with a hook that half lands and is half blocked by Grabber's hand.
This is a great period of action - very entertaining stuff!
Grabber throws the left hand but Thompson avoids the punch easily.
Grabber misses with a half-hearted attempt at a head kick.
Grabber defending well as Thompson loads up on a big left hand.
Crotch Grabber seems to be the more aggressive standup fighter in this bout.
Grabber misses the jab.

That's two minutes gone in the round.
Grabber walks into a straight right hand from Thompson.
Grabber scores with a nice strike.
Grabber uses good footwork to get in and out and land a nice right hand before Thompson has time to react.
Thompson has his hands up protecting his head but a hook from Grabber finds it's way round the side to connect with Thompson's head.
Thompson misses with a hook.
Thompson takes a step back and watches a body kick go sailing past his mid section.
Grabber throws a lazy head kick
and Thompson counters with a nice body shot.
Thompson is landing a lot of head punches in this opening round! Grabber had better start moving his head a bit unless he wants his face to turn into pâté.
Grabber misses with a head kick.
Thompson throws a sloppy head kick and Grabber moves out of range easily.
Grabber is looking to counter punch.
Thompson keeping a good distance there, avoiding the body shot.
Grabber moves out of range as Thompson strikes.
Thompson tests Grabber's chin there with a solid looking shot.
Thompson throws a head kick that misses.
Grabber is looking to counter punch.
Grabber bobs and weaves well there to avoid the strikes.

That's three minutes gone in the round.
Grabber throws out a loose jab but Thompson uses good head movement to avoid it.
Grabber just misses with a punch to the body.
Grabber swings for the body but Thompson moves out of range.
Thompson ducks under an overhand right and circles away with a smile on his face.
Grabber ducks down and throws a hook to the body but Thompson moves away.
Grabber waving his hands out in front of him, looking to distract Thompson.
Grabber misses with a double jab.
Thompson throws a lazy body kick
and Grabber counters with a quick right hand to the jaw.
Grabber throws a head kick that misses and slips in the process. He scrambles back to his feet and the fighters circle.
Grabber takes a swing at Thompson's ribcage but misses.
A nice side step and Thompson releases a counter shot to the body, but it doesn't find it's home.
Grabber scores with a punch to the head.
Thompson is looking to take this fight into the clinch.

That's four minutes gone in the round.
Thompson connects with a body shot.
Thompson throws a body punch but Grabber moves out of range.
Grabber misses with a telegraphed body shot
and Thompson counters with a good right hand that lands right on the jaw.
Thompson is pinned up against the cage taking some big shots here. The referee is looking closely deciding whether he should stop the fight.
Nice defenses there by Grabber.
Grabber fires out a quick counter leg kick but Thompson just manages to avoid it.
The crowd cheering loudly, showing their appreciation for the quality fight we're seeing here.
Grabber throws a looping overhand right but Thompson ducks down to avoid it.
Grabber keeps the fight on the outside.
Grabber lands with a nice combination. Thompson backs away looking to recover.
Thompson throws a shot from downtown. Grabber moves away and avoids it.
Thompson takes a swing at Grabber's ribcage but misses.
Grabber moves out of range of the strikes.
The crowd applaud the fighters' efforts here as the round comes to an end.
Thompson throws a poor cross that misses
enabling Grabber to counter with a crisp jab.
Grabber scores with a jab. Thompson acknowledges it with a nod of the head.
And that’s the end of the round – the fighters go back to their corners.

Crotch Grabber dominated that round.
The fighters' corners scream their final instructions, as the referee calls time. Here we go, back to the action!

Grabber throws out a powerful jab.
Grabber throws a hook but Thompson blocks it.
Thompson slips under a jab.
Thompson swings and misses with a shot to the body
and Grabber counters with a nice body shot.
Thompson showing good head movement there, avoiding the strikes from Grabber.
Grabber takes a swing at Thompson's ribcage but misses.
Grabber swings and misses with a shot to the body
and Thompson counters with a lovely straight right hand!
Grabber uses good head movement to avoid the hook from Thompson.
Thompson takes a shot right to the liver - Bas would have been proud of that punch.
We've had a slow start to the round here - hopefully the action picks up.
Thompson throws a jab when Grabber was well out of range.
Grabber scores with a nice head shot.
Thompson throws a hook to the body but it doesn't connect.
Grabber with a body punch. A glancing blow.

That's one minute gone in the round.
Grabber lands a lovely overhand right.
Grabber lands with a good body shot.
Grabber throws a combination but it was largely blocked by Thompson.
Thompson throws a counter combo.
Crotch Grabber is winning the standup battle so far.
Thompson looks shocked there as he takes a right hand to the temple.
Grabber bobs and weaves and unloads with a good uppercut.
Nice body punch from Grabber.
Grabber misses with a body shot. Nice footwork from Thompson.
Thompson misses with a body shot.
Grabber scores with a nice right hand.
Grabber swings wildly with a right hand that was never going to find it's target.
Grabber avoids the head kick by Thompson.
Jab, jab by Grabber - just one landing.
Grabber tries a head kick but it misses.

That's two minutes gone in the round.
This is a great period of action - very entertaining stuff!
Thompson bobs and weaves and throws out a fast jab that snaps Grabber's head backwards.
Grabber swats away the attempt to clinch by Thompson.
Thompson throws a lazy right hand but Grabber sees it coming a mile off and sidesteps it easily.
Thompson takes a body kick right on the floating rib. Ouchie.
Thompson looks to score with a jab to the body but Grabber is just out of range.
Grabber lands a straight punch to the body, keeping Thompson at a distance.
Thompson misses with a hook. Grabber ducked under it nicely.
Grabber misses with a head kick.
Thompson swings away with a counter right hand but no contact made.
Grabber throws a body kick that sends a sickening thudding noise reverberating around the arena.
Grabber is using his height advantage well here, landing a good percentage of his punches.
Grabber throws a shot from downtown. Thompson moves away and avoids it.
Grabber throws a series of punches but Thompson moves out of range.
Thompson doesn't fully commit to the body shot counter.
Thompson misses with a body kick.

That's three minutes gone in the round.
Thompson avoids a lazy jab quite easily.
A countering left hand to the body from Thompson misses.
Thompson throws an ugly left hook that misses
and Grabber counters with a stiff right hand.
Thompson takes a jab right on the nose. That must have hurt but he shrugs his shoulders and looks to return the favor.
Nice body kick from Grabber.
Grabber misses with a hook.
Grabber throws a hook to the side of Thompson's head but Thompson sees it coming and ducks under it beautifully.
Grabber misses with a body shot. Nice footwork from Thompson.
Thompson tries to land with a swinging hook to the body but Grabber was well out of range. Poor timing from Thompson.
Thompson misses with a looping right.
Thompson ducks down and throws a hook to the body but Grabber moves away.
As Thompson looks to move away, Grabber throws a big counter combo but Thompson just gets out of the way.
The crowd cheers as Grabber lands an impressive looking overhand right. Thompson doesn't seem phased though.
Grabber jabs Thompson to the body, keeping him at a distance.
A jab from Grabber misses.

That's four minutes gone in the round.
Grabber misses with a half-hearted attempt at a head kick.
Grabber with a hook.
Grabber is using his reach advantage well here, landing the more effective single shots from range.
Thompson avoids the head kick by Grabber.
The fans in attendance giving it up for the two fighters, who have really let it all hang out in the last minute or so!
Thompson has his head snapped back a nice jab. A little nod from Thompson there as he acknowledges the shot.
Grabber throws a head kick that misses and slips in the process. He scrambles back to his feet and the fighters circle.
Grabber pulls out of a head kick attempt.
Thompson looks like he wants to counter punch here.
Grabber is really dominating this fight. Is there anything that Thompson can do to turn this around?
Grabber throws a head kick that misses.
Grabber lands a nice looking body shot.
Thompson displays some good footwork, moving neatly out of range as Grabber throws out the jab.
Thompson appears to be waiting to throw a counter punch to the body.
Grabber slips under a jab from Thompson.
Grabber scores with a jab.
Grabber bobs and weaves and throws out a fast jab that snaps Thompson's head backwards.
Thompson swings wildly with a right hand that was never going to find it's target.
And that’s the end of the round – the fighters go back to their corners.

Crotch Grabber dominated that second round.
The fighters' corners scream their final instructions, as the referee calls time. Here we go, back to the action! This is the final round!

Grabber misses with a head kick.
Grabber misses with a two punch combination.
Thompson falls off balance throwing a combination
and Grabber makes him pay by landing a nice hook to the body before moving out of range.
Thompson throws a hook to the body but it doesn't connect.
Grabber looks to score with a combo but nothing lands.
Grabber tries a switch kick but it misses it's target.
Thompson swings away with a counter right hand but no contact made.
Thompson slips under a jab from Grabber.
Thompson uses good footwork to avoid the strikes from Grabber.
We've had a slow start to the round here - hopefully the action picks up.
Nice shot lands for Grabber.
Thompson loads up on a big right hand but Grabber slips the punch.
Grabber misses with a hook. Thompson ducked under it nicely.
Thompson takes a really solid shot there but just smiles back and shrugs his shoulders.
Thompson displays some good footwork, moving neatly out of range as Grabber throws out the jab.

That's one minute gone in the round.
Grabber cracks Thompson with an open hand slap.
Grabber misses with a hook
and Thompson counters with an inside leg kick.
A jab from Thompson misses.
A big left from Thompson misses.
Thompson throws out a loose jab but Grabber uses good head movement to avoid it.
Grabber bobs and weaves well there to avoid the strikes.
Thompson ducks under a wild hook from Grabber.
Thompson avoids the head kick by Grabber.
Grabber bobs and weaves and unloads with a good uppercut.
A shot to the liver by Grabber. Beautiful body shot.
Thompson throws a hook but Grabber blocks it.
Thompson uses good footwork to get in and out, landing a nice hook.
Crotch Grabber is fighting for a decision here - he's started to take the cautious approach.

That's two minutes gone in the round.
Grabber throws a combination but it was largely blocked by Thompson.
Grabber throws a looping overhand right but Thompson ducks down to avoid it.
Grabber swings widly with a right hand
and Thompson counters with a nice leg kick.
Both fighters are breathing heavily.
Thompson throws a right hand that misses
and Grabber counters with a lovely straight right hand!
The crowd are loving this. Great action here.
Thompson lands a nice shot to the body.
Grabber connects with a slap. Keep your fist closed son.

Thompson gets in close and instigates a clinch.
Thompson fails to land with a short punch on the inside.
Thompson lands a right uppercut that snaps the head of Grabber backwards.
Thompson struggles to land a body shot inside as Grabber controls his hands.
Thompson misses with the head strike.
Thompson tries to work over Grabber's body with a swooping hook but it only glances the target.
Thompson scores with a shot to the side of Grabber's head.
A head punch on the inside from Thompson fails to land.
Grabber lands with a left to the head.

That's three minutes gone in the round.
Thompson throws a punch but it's blocked by Grabber.
Thompson misses with some punches.
Thompson doesn't land with the attempted body shot.
Thompson lands with a good tight uppercut to the head.
Thompson tries to throw a body punch but Grabber avoids it by throwing Thompson back against the cage.
Grabber tried to land a shot to the body but connects with Thompson's elbow.
Thompson tries to throw a body punch but Grabber avoids it by throwing Thompson back against the cage.
Thompson lands with a left to the head.
Patrick Thompson has stepped it up - he knows he needs a finish here!
Thompson tries to work over Grabber's body with a swooping hook but it only glances the target.
Thompson tries a body shot but Grabber blocks it.
Thompson fails to land with a short punch on the inside.
Grabber blocks an uppercut.
Grabber tries to pull guard but Thompson won't allow it.
Thompson misses with a body punch.
Thompson throws a head punch that misses.
Thompson tries to land a shot to the body but it's blocked.

That's four minutes gone in the round.
Thompson fails to land with a short punch on the inside.
Thompson lands with a quick shot inside that doesn't really do much damage.
Grabber prevents a body shot from Thompson.
Thompson tries to land a shot to the body but it's blocked.
Grabber prevents a body shot from Thompson.
Grabber tries to pull guard but Thompson forces him back to his feet, against the cage.

Thompson breaks from the clinch.
Thompson tries to clinch but Grabber is having none of it.
Thompson loads up on a big right hand but Grabber slips the punch.
Grabber keeping a good distance there, avoiding the body shot.
Grabber cracks Thompson with a nice right hand that draws applause from the crowd.
The crowd cheering loudly, showing their appreciation for the quality fight we're seeing here.
Grabber throws a head kick that misses and slips in the process. He scrambles back to his feet and the fighters circle.
Thompson now looks to counter with a shot at the body.
Grabber connects with a looping left hand that seems like it dazed Thompson momentarily.
Thompson steps to the side to avoid the strikes from Grabber.
Grabber has been working on his balance at Men Only. No Liberals !, so perhaps that has help him stuff some of the takedown attempts by Thompson.
Thompson throws a lazy uppercut
letting Grabber counter with a right hand.

And that's the end of the fight!
I would just about give that final round to Patrick Thompson.
I think Grabber has won this one but let's see what the judges have to say. Over to the ring announcer for the scorecards.

Ladies and gentlemen, after 3 rounds of action, we go to the scorecards for a decision.
Judge Timothy Bukovac scores the fight 30:27
Judge Don Winkell scores the fight 30:27
Judge Percy O'Donnell scores the fight 29:28

In favor of your winner, by unanimous decision... Crotch Grabber!
Crotch Grabber took to the microphone after his victory and thanked his sponsors, UnderGround Clothing Co. for their support in the buildup to the fight.