PBP Commentary

Coming up we have a heavyweight MMA rules bout between Harry Kane (ranked 2440 p4p, 4890 weight class) and Ding Ding Dong (ranked 0 p4p, 0 weight class). Harry Kane is staring across the cage at his opponent, tweaking his nipples... Tweaking his own nipples that is.

Kane
vs
Ding Dong

195 cm
37
245
14 - 8 - 0

200 cm
23
265
7 - 25 - 0

Great wrestler
World class boxer
Insanely flexible

BJJ Blue Belt
Basic striking
Granite chin

Ladies and gentlemen. This fight is 3 rounds, in the heavyweight division.
Introducing the fighter to my left, fighting out of the red corner.
With a record of 14 - 8 - 0, fighting out of Montreal, Harry Kane!
And introducing the fighter to my right, fighting out of the blue corner.
With a record of 7 - 25 - 0, fighting out of Las Vegas, Ding Ding Dong!
The judges for this bout are Steve Smith, Alec Ball and Dillan Fox.

The bell rings for round one and we are underway!
Ding Dong stumbles momentarily as he takes a strong leg kick from Kane.

Kane forces Ding Dong back against the cage and clinches.

Kane is trying to trip Ding Dong. He has hold of a leg but Ding Dong is hopping around, keeping his balance for the moment. Kane persists though and gets the takedown into guard.
Ding Dong working the defensive guard well to avoid strikes from Kane.
Kane has been looking to land a fair amount of strikes on the ground. He might be looking to soften his opponent up in order to work for a submission.
Kane pushes down on Ding Dong's leg and manages to get into half guard.
Well, if Kane is going to just lie there, perhaps we should talk about what we're having for dinner tonight… I'm having a ham and pineapple pizza… Yum. Can't wait.
Ding Dong really doesn't want to stay on the ground with Kane. If he can't get it back to his feet, it's only a matter of time before he'll be tapping out.
Kane is pressing down on Ding Dong's thigh, looking to free his foot. Ding Dong is holding on for now.
We've had a slow start to the round here - hopefully the action picks up.

Kane is working for a submission of some sort.

Kane looking for a kimura but he'll have to free his other leg if he wants to finish that. Perhaps he's just using it as a distraction technique.

That's one minute gone in the round.
Ding Dong wants to control but Kane is keeping busy.
Kane keeping composed on the top, looking to control the action.

Kane looking for a kimura but he'll have to free his other leg if he wants to finish that. Perhaps he's just using it as a distraction technique.
The ref warns both fighters not to hold the cage as they work up against the meshing.

That's two minutes gone in the round.
The crowd are showing their displeasure at the lack of action as loud boos ring out around the arena.
Kane controlling the action here.
We've been hearing good reports from Kane's training camp. Apparently he has been rolling around with some good quality BJJ practitioners and has been sharpening his skills. Let's see if that has an impact on the fight today.
Kane tries to pass to full mount but Ding Dong defends it.

That's three minutes gone in the round.
Ding Dong is looking to escape.
Ding Dong is looking to improve his position.

Kane seems to be looking for submissions.

Kane is trying to work for a kimura but Ding Dong is defending well.
Kane keeping composed on the top, looking to control the action.

Kane is working for a kimura but Ding Dong is defending it quite comfortably.

Kane maintaining the dominant position here and is working for a kimura. He's locked it up! Ding Dong could be in real trouble here! He's trying to wriggle out but Kane has cracked it and Ding Dong is screaming in pain - he's tapped out! Great finish by Kane!

Ladies and gentlemen, after 4:57 of round 1, we have a winner by way of Submission (Kimura). Harry Kane!
An out of breath Harry Kane thanked his loyal fans in his post fight interview, giving them credit for his success over the course of his career.
In defeat, Ding Ding Dong stepped up to the mic, saying '"Everybody out there know I beat him, I controlled the fight, he was missing, I hit him plenty more times. I beat him.Let me talk something... I want to thank the whole hood who came out here. I love y'all. I did this for the hood, you know I beat that boy.'.