B0st0nh00ligan

Question: The start and end date for creating fighters, what time zone is that based off of?

Sign me up.

Chincheck Preview As if the three title fights on the 7th were not enough, Built 2 Last went out, and made another event, B2L 11: Chincheck, which will take place on the 8th! This event features the fourth title bout in two days. This time Egg Nok will take on Max House for the lightweight championship. In addition to that, there is a full card of exciting fights which will take place. If you are a fan of MMA, B2L is obviously the promotion to watch, as they are throwing a continuous litany of top notch fights at you every week, sometimes on back to back days! PierreLuc Beaulieu is coming off a recent loss to tonight’s title contender, Max House. Having lost his last two bouts, Beaulieu is looking to turn things around, and get back to winning ways. If you watched B2L 7, you absolutely remember Michael Jimenez’s second round dominating TKO victory. Entering this fight with a mixed 2-2 record, Jimenez will be looking for another dominating victory. This fight looks very much like Jimenez’s to lose. Being an good striker is important for anyone, but compound the fact that Jimenez does not go to the ground easily, and when there holds a purple belt in BJJ, you have a seriously dangerous combination. This is compounded by Beaulieu’s preference to win by submission, and only being a blue belt. Obviously, this may be a difficult match for Beaulieu to end is losing streak. Crusher Jackson impressed people with his come from behind unanimous decision victory when he fought his first professional fight. Having both boxing and wrestling skills helped him out with that victory, many did not even expect him to attempt takedowns, like he did. That surprise factor will not be available again as he enters the cage to fight Alan Ringseal. In fact, the element of surprise will be in Ringseal’s favor as he will be fighting his first professional bout. Ringseal, we are told, is a strong wrestler, as well as having skills which make him capable of fighting a fight anywhere. The interesting question is what his plans will be in this fight, and being unable to be sure of Ringseal’s plans may really hurt Jackson in this fight as far as game planning. Fabio Huerta fought his first fight in June of 2009. He has been around as long as some of the biggest names in the sport. To date, he has not gotten his big break as a fighter, and has stuck around the lower levels of competition. He is definitely not someone to sleep on though, as he won his B2L premier by submission, and has won seven of his nine fights by submission. Hannibal Lecter VIII has gone 2-1 since joining B2L, having lost his last match by decision to the elite Beautiful Boxer. Lecter showed life towards the end of that fight, and many felt he won the final round. So far, Lecter has gone 1-1 fighting BJJ brown belts, losing the first by submission, and winning the more recent fight by decision. We shall see if he can now win a fight over someone as talented on the ground as Huerta has proven to be. Georges Dunston got dominated in his first career fight against George St Pierre. Dunston managed to land 4 of his 5 takedown attempts, but that was about the extent of his control in the fight. St Pierre continuously would reverse position, and smash Dunston with ground and pound. It was an important learning experience for Dunston, teaching him the importance of expanding his fighting game a bit more, to include strikes, rather than just rely on his wrestling abilities. He will need that new knowledge when entering the cage to fight Lucas Nogueira. Nogueira is making his professional debut, and will likely cause a lot of problems for Dunston. Nogueira is a better wrestler, neutralizing Dunston’s preferred style, and is about equal in all other areas. This fight is a very close and interesting match up that I am looking forward to seeing the results of. Serguei Iganashov enters his first B2L fight with the best record of anyone even joining the family without having fought in another org before. At 5-0, Iganashov will be looking to extend his winning streak, using his wonderful boxing skills, which have helped him to win 4 of his fights by way of (T)KO. His opponent, Kick Flip, while not yet compiling an equally impressive record, is also undefeated. Flip has won his first two fights by way of decision, usually using a ‘lay and pray’ system. In his first professional fight, all he did was take his opponent down. In fact, that was all the action the entire fight. While this may not be as showy and impressive as the way Iganashov uses to win, no one can claim it is not an effective system. The largest question in this fight however, is whether or not Flip will be able to take Iganashov down, considering he is the best wrestler he has faced to date. If there were a sure bet in any fight on this card, it would be that the next match will be battled out by the two fighters on their feet. When you put two super heavyweights with wonderful boxing skills and enough wrestling to keep them on their feet, ‘fight of the night’ is definitely a possibility. Both Bobby Leo and Teyark Olso have won all of their fights by way of knockout. Only Olso had been knocked out before, though. Leo’s better chin may be the determining factor in this fight, as there is almost no doubt these two will come out and swing for the fences in this one. If you are a fan of watching two giant men beat the ever loving crap out of each other in a ring, don’t miss this fight. While on the subject of big boys who like to knock people out, how about Oleg Sladkov? In his last appearance, at B2L 7, Sladkov won Knockout of the Night honors for his nine second knockout of Big Buster. Sladkov enters the cage to take on one of his toughest challenges yet, the undefeated Kenyon star. Kenyon, like Sladkov, is a striker. So far, star has not shown the knockout power that we know Sladkov has. We do know that star has a good chin, though, which may make a huge difference in this fight. If Kenyon’s chin can withstand some of the punishment that it will undoubtedly take from Sladkov, Kenyon may be able win decision. Or maybe I’m looking at this the wrong way, and maybe star will score a five second knockout and surprise the world. We’ll see. The final undercard features two 1-0 welterweight fighters. Willie Boyd, fighting out of New York, is the better boxer of the two. Tyrese Jennings, however, has the better Muay Thai. Those are the only differences between these two very similar fighters on paper. On paper, this should be an incredibly exciting, close match. I believe Boyd may have more heart, though, evidenced by his come from behind victory in his first match. If this belief holds true, we can look for Boyd to walk away still undefeated, and looking to take the welterweight division by storm. If you’re a fan of grappling matches, the co-main event is the fight for you to watch. Gary Moskavony has won all three of his fights by way of submission. He has not, at this point, fought anyone who is quite as good as Tche Bagual on the ground. This causes an interesting situation. If Moskavony keeps this fight standing, he can win hands down, as he undoubtedly has the better striking skill. One has to wonder how willing he will be to change his normal game plan. This fight will all come down to whether or not Moskavony’s game plan entering the fight, if he fails to adapt, expect him to accept his first loss to the superior grappler, Bagual. When titles are on the line, fights are always exciting. Both fighters are willing to fight their hearts out in their attempt to seize the moniker of champion. The battle for this lightweight championship will be no different. Interestingly, it appears both fighter’s parents were thirsty when naming them as well, considering the fight pits Egg Nok against Max House. The coffee man, Max House, is a favorite in this fight, and with very good reason, he’s already beaten Egg Nok. He dominated his way to a unanimous decision victory all the way back at B2L 2. Since then, House has won back to back submission victories. Nok learned a lot from that fight, though, and considers it a huge turning point in his career. Until then, he had struggled as a fighter with a 3-4 fighter, since then he has secured back to back victories, due to diligent training, and has earned himself a rematch, and a title fight. This fight will be the true test for Nok, can he beat the man who changed his career? Or will he step back into the shadows of mediocrity? There’s only one way to find out, watch this fight. I hope to see you there with me at Paddy O’Malley’s. If you do, make sure you offer me a free beer.

World's Collide Preview Jake Waldren very well may have lost his mind. Not one. Not two. No, Three. Yes, three. Three what? Title fights. That’s right, the owner of B2L, Jake Waldren put together a card featuring three title fights on the same card. I tried to talk him out of it. “Come on man, spread it out a bit, my mind might explode if there’s three title fights on one card. You may even piss of the gods by surmounting their awesomeness.” He wasn’t hearing it though. So now we have the pleasure of watching three titles being battled for for the first time. The welterweight, light heavyweight, and heavyweight titles will all be on the line. Before I start discussing those, though, let’s take a look at the rest of the card. Both of the fighters in the first match are coming off of first round victories in their previous fight. Shinya Aoki managed a 44 second submission on his last opponent, and Angus MacAngus a triangle at 4:26. Both have rather different histories in their professional careers. At this point, Aoki is only 3-2, and struggled when he first entered organized competition. MacAngus, on the other hand, has developed an 8-3 record, and shined when competition is at it’s highest. MacAngus is even a former champion in the now defunct Waldo Cage Fighting in New York. After losing his title, MacAngus took seven months off from the sport. Many thought he was considering retirement after his solid run. It turned out he spent that time training, and it paid off, with his victory in his last fight. Now MacAngus seeks to return to his old glory days, and his first step will be getting past the excellent grappling skills which Shinya Aoki possesses. Will Aoki manage the upset over the veteran favorite? Remember Robbie McSlaughter’s first round knockout at B2L 8? Of course you do, stupid question, it was so impressive he won the fight of the night award. Well after that match, he earned himself a chance to avenge his only loss. That’s right, McSlaughter is climbing back in the cage with Nigel York. York also fought at B2L 8, winning a unanimous decision over Steve Fox. More importantly, though, York won his first fight as a professional against McSlaughter. The first fight was a one-sided drumming by York, whose striking skills are generally out of this world. We shall see if McSlaughter has progressed as a fighter since the first fight between these two, and whether or not he will be capable of avoiding the knockout McSlaughter will be aiming to repeat. In the fight between Dan st pierre, and Vance Gates, one of the fighters will, finally, walk out of the cage with a mark in the W column. Neither has won a fight in their combined five fights, a testament to how difficult MMA competition truly is, because neither fighter can be classified as a slouch. Gates, in the past, has shown the most troubles. His four fights look like this: Submission, submission, submission, KO. Not an excellent way to start your career, and he will undoubtedly be coming out to this fight with aims to win no matter what. Don’t be surprised to see him swinging for the fences at the word go, in hopes of saving his name as a fighter. Dan, on the other hand, may have just been on the unlucky receiving end of an excellent series of strikes by the dangerous Jason Celso. If his first fight does in fact prove to be a fluke of a young fighter not being experienced enough in the cage, and getting caught, he may have an easy victory against the struggling Gates. Let’s not get off of the subject of Vance Gates just yet. His last fight he lost by knockout to none other than Nathan Matos. Matos enters the cage on the 7th to fight another struggling fighter, Dam Mouth. Mouth, who has some impressive skills has not made it out of the first round in either of his B2L fights. Jose Oquendo, B2L’s middleweight champion, knocked Mouth out with a demolishing head kick, and Peter Just caught him in a rear naked choke. If he wants his B2L career to last, he will have to win this fight. The 4-2 Matos will not lay down and hand him a win. With his wonderful striking abilities, and known knockout power, Matos will cause Mouth a lot of problems. It appears Mouth’s only chance is to bring this fight to the ground. Two eighteen year olds will be making their B2L premier in the subsequent fight; EJ Resparzo will be making his professional premier. Resparzo maintains some impressive ground fighting skills, holding a brown belt in BJJ, coupled with wrestling and boxing skill, he has to be the favorite entering this fight, despite his lack of experience. Lando Gracie is no pushover, though. Gracie has gone undefeated in his first two fights, winning both by decision. Unfortunately for Gracie, all of his skills are overshadowed by Resparzo. One thing we know about Gracie, though, is he is a determined little bastard. That heart may make a difference in this fight, plus the cage experience that Gracie brings to the fight. John Helmsley is probably the best grappler B2L has seen. In his two professional fights, both with B2L, Helmsley has won submission of the night both times. Quite an honor. Neither of the fighters he has faced in the past have secured a win in their career, which is important to note. For the first time, he enters the cage against a combatant who has won in his professional career. Thomas Pollard is traditionally a Muay Thai fighter, but simultaneously holds pretty proficient skill on the ground, as he showed in his past fight, winning by submission. This fight will be a litmus test for Helmsley, to see if he is actually talented, or has lucked out with his previous competition. Tony Douglass has fought for B2L in all three of his fights, won all of those fights by knockout, and earned two knockout of the night awards. Think that record is impressive? Look at Avtomat Kalashnikov’s. Despite this being his first fight in B2L, Kalashnikov has earned the right to fight for the heavyweight championship. Hold on a second. Did I say heavyweight championship? Yeah. I did. Here’s the part where you look at me with a crazy look in your eye and say, “But… but, Brian. This isn’t even the final undercard bout, I thought there were only three title fights? What is going on? My head is going to explode?!” Trust me, I understand. I had the same reaction when I first saw the card. The only justification I have created for myself at this point is that Jake Waldren didn’t want us all to lose our minds with a succession of three title fights in a row. Paying for damages caused by rioters is expensive. Anyways, back to the topic at hand Kalashnikov’s record. Kalashnikov used to fight for SFO. He actually got his start fighting in the inaugural Become a Made Man tournament, which he won. Since then, he has split fights, and apparently, either SFO didn’t want to retain him, or Waldren made the Made Man an offer he couldn’t refuse. What we do know is this exciting fighter will be coming into the ring smelling blood, and looking to win a belt. It will be interesting to see if this fight makes it out of the first round, as neither fighter has ever fought out of the first round. This fight could come down to who has the better gas tank as we enter the later rounds of this fight. Now for what I call the enigma fight. Not to disrespect either of these fighters, I just don’t understand how this follows that title fight, which will undoubtedly be a fight of the night contender. Beautiful Boxer is 2-0 as a professional fighter, both fights taking place within the B2L cage. Boxer wins his fights using his incredible striking skills. Luckily for Boxer, he has never really faced a fighter with impressive grappling skills, since as good as his striking is, his ground work is among the worst in the business. His opponent, george st. pierre, will finally put Boxer to the challenge. Also undefeated, st pierre will be the largest challenge Boxer has had so far, as far as grapplers are concerned. This is not all, though, st pierre actually won his first fight on his feet. This shows he can adapt and overcome. This should be a good fight, and a good filler between the three title fights of the night. The second title fight, a battle at light heavyweight, features two undefeated strikers, with rather different styles. Pit Bull likes to win his fights by wearing out his opponents. In his last two fights, he has thrown over 80 leg kicks per match. If that is not enough for him to secure victory, he tends to clinch up with his opponent, and deliver a succession of elbows, with malicious intent, hoping to end the fight with a cut, which is how he won his first fight. In contrast, Chucky Little just looks to demolish opponents. His two fights in B2L have lasted less than two minutes. Combined. He has won four total, and only one fight has made it out of the first round, his first, a three round decision. We shall see in this fight which style is more effective, the brutal kicker, or the demolishing flasher. The main event features two of the only members of B2L worthy of headlining a card like this. Marshall Law is one of the most experienced fighters in the world of MMA. With sixteen victories under his belt, the twenty eight year old fighter admits this may be one of his last chances at a title. Having lost his previous three attempts at a belt in the defunct DFC in Las Vegas, Law has fought everywhere, and recently pulled off a string of three straight victories vaulting him to a fight of this level. Recent quotes from Law hint that if he does not win this fight, retirement may be on the horizon. Mikhail Chivitchian hopes to earn the title of legend killer in addition to the championship in this fight. Chivitichian, unlike Law, has shown an ability to shine in moments like these, having previously held the title for the now bankrupt UFF in New York. Since losing that title, he showed up here in B2L, beat George St pierre (not the same one in the final undercard bout, obviously), and earned this title shot. This will be an incredibly tough battle for both fighters, one I cannot wait to see.

Aries Henderson has called out Jimmy Cricket, saying he wants to avenge the stunning loss Ajarn Max had against Cricket, bringing honor back to his camp.

I figured that was probably the case, I was just making sure. No offense is ever truly meant in my articles, and I've been much more cruel to fighters, I'm pretty sure I jinxed Bryan Adams at AFTERSHOCK with my paragraph long rant about how I hated him for stealing my middle school girlfriend. Still one of my favorite tangential rants in an article.

Paypal definitely can transfer directly from a bank account, that's how mine is set up.

Just to throw it out there, I'm the writer of that article, and that was in no way a dig on you, just my writing style. Congrats on your win.

People often ask me, “Brian, how did you manage to score such an awesome job? All you do all day is interact with MMA fighters, watch events, and write stories. You’re doing what you love, and what many people dream to do.” Well, I intend to answer that question is a couple of parts. First, I paid for a really good fake journalism degree from some website I found on Google (it only cost me $200!). Second, I annoyed the living shit out of some organization owners to let me write about their organization. Third, and most importantly, the visionary leader, Jake Waldren, who runs Built 2 Last Premier MMA saw potential in me, that I had an inner drive to cover these stories which was unmatched, and I could actually produce something great (either that or he was desperate, and thought my degree from South Eastern Miami Community College was legitimate). B2L 10: New Year’s Jam shows more than anything else how much of a visionary Mr. Waldren is. Each event, Waldren seems to try something different, searching for what attracts viewers to his shows the most. At B2L 10, he is bringing back the cage. Additionally, he is trying something never tried before by the organization, he’s testing a new 10-point must system for the judges to score fights. We shall see how this affects the fights taking place. This shall be the first event of the new year ran by B2L, and should be extremely exciting. Let’s take a look at the fights set to take place. Never shy to back away from explosive fights, B2L starts off with a bang usually only heard out of a Mossberg shotgun. What else would you expect from them? “Mr. Mombasa” Shanzo Miganzo, the twenty year old Kenyan Light-Heavyweight, has already won one fight of the night, and one knockout of the night award during his career. He has shown impressive power in the past, and has strong wrestling to back up his exceptional boxing skill. Miganzo will need every bit of his exceptional cardio, and large heart against his undefeated eighteen year old opponent, Bret McCoy. McCoy, coming from the small town of Wayne, West Virginia, has an opposite approach to fighting. Rather than stand and fight, McCoy uses his remarkable wrestling ability to bring fights to the ground. From there he typically grinds out a victory through submission attempts and ground and pound. It should be interesting to see whose style prevails in this fight. Two fights, two awards, that’s how Dutch Hand rolls. This Zimbabwean has some of the most impressive wrestling skills seen on the scene today. That’s good, because his stand-up is pitiful. That’s how he lost his last fight, his opponent game planned in advance, knowing Dutch had no chance in the fight if he kept it standing. Dutch also showed a weakness in that fight, developing a nasty gash before he was knocked out. One has to wonder if all the years he spent wrestling has lead to a higher probability of him being cut by accurate shots. I imagine Tyson Storm, his opponent noticed this watching tape of his opponent’s last fight, and will intend to game plan against it. Tyson, like Hand’s last opponent, will most likely look to keep this fighting standing as well. While Tyson does not world class striking abilities, they are significantly better than Hand’s, and he has just enough wrestling to keep the fight standing. Should be interesting to see if Tyson can successfully win his first MMA bout. In our third bout imma truth, from Azerbaijan, where names are not capitalized, will be fighting Jan Veavatne. This bout will come down to intelligence versus determination. In his first fight, truth dominated his opponent with a successful use of the clinch, and through sheer determination willed his way to victory. Veavatne, we are told, has very high fighting intelligence. This was not exactly shown in his first fight, unfortunately, as he walked straight into a right hand and got his ass knocked the fuck out. It is worth noting that his first opponent was Henry Hammer, you know, the guy who just fought in the championship fight against Jose Oquendo. So, it’s kind of unfair to judge him by just that one fight, this fight should show Veavatne’s true skills, and we will know whether he is as good as people say he is. Are you ready for a wrestling match? I know I am, and that’s a good thing, because in the fourth fight, we get to watch two of the very best wrestlers in B2L step into the cage. Peter Vulture won his first fight by decision. He won that fight by taking the other fighter to the ground and unleashing some impressive ground and pound on him. The question is whether or not that tactic will work on his opponent, Remy Lee, who has the exact same fighting style. Who will shine as the better ground and pound fighter? Or will Vulture use his superior striking to win this fight? It’s definitely something keeping an eye out for and I can’t wait to watch it. Hopefully Luke Downer has worked on defending submissions better since the last time we saw him fight in B2L. Downer faces his second BJJ brown belt in a row, the first won by Americana in the third round. The key for Downer is to keep this fight on his feet, which may not be difficult, considering his opponent, Logan Louise is not exceptionally skilled in wrestling. If by some chance, Louise gets this fight to the ground, Downer’s night is almost definitely over. Louise, an eighteen year old BJJ brown belt, has already won two fights in his MMA career by submission. If Downer can keep it on his feet, he’ll win, if you don’t think he will be able to, get on the phone with your bookie right now, and tell him you want Louise. Remy Garmin claims to be an Olympic gold medalist in wrestling. A quick Google search reveals no such information, but what is undeniable is that he really is a quality wrestler. It is questionable whether or not it will be sufficient for him to earn a victory on New Year’s day though. While he will unquestionably rule the wrestling department in this fight, his opponent, Dean Perry, is actually more skilled once the fight hits the canvas. Perry, in addition to being a proficient boxer, is a BJJ purple belt. This will undoubtedly cause problems for Garmin in this fight, as it cancels out his preferred, “takedown, strike, strike, strike, submission attempt” method of fighting, as Perry will not only be able to submit Garmin, but will have the skill to grapple for better position, nullifying the wrestler’s ground and pound tactics. Undoubtedly, this is the fight I am most excited to watch. Rob Gurgel will be fighting jose madureira in the seventh bout of the night. Gurgel was knocked out in his first B2L fight, and will come into this fight looking to avenge his only loss. He has been working hard at the gym, and it is known that he really wants to win this fight. The Brazilian, jose madureira, whose family at one point in history lived in Azerbaijan, wants to produce a repeat of Gurgel’s first B2L fight. He has world class striking ability, and will want to knock his opponent out quickly. The quick knockout is madureira’s only real chance in this fight though, as his ground game is non-existent. I expect to see jose come out swinging wildly for the fences, and if he connects, this could be the shortest fight in the history of B2L. Our final under card pits Travis Ramsey in a three round duel with Maximilien Robespierre. Again, another very interesting match up. Both fighters have excellent wrestling abilities, but I would not bet on this fight ever seeing the canvas. Ramsey has unfortunately been stuck with back to back no contests, as his opponents failed to make it to the fight on time. This only means that Ramsey has had a considerable amount of time to train since his last fight, all the way back in September, which he won by decision. Expect Ramsey fired up and ready to fight after such a long lapse without a fight. His opponent, Robespierre, will be no pushover. Robespierre has some nasty Muay Thai skills, and even nastier elbows, which have lead to his two previous victories. Ramsey will almost undoubtedly walk out of the ring with a cut. Hopefully, for Ramsey’s sake and the sake of the fans, the cut is not the reason for the fight to end, as we all prefer to watch fighters fight to the finish rather than be stopped by cuts. This should definitely play out interestingly. The co-main event features two fighters with 2-1 records. Troy Johnson Johnson has spent his entire career fighting in B2L. He enters this fight riding a two fight winning streak, one by TKO, the other by decision. At nineteen, he has established a base level of knowledge in all aspects of MMA, and will likely need all of his knowledge to beat his opponent, Cain Marco. Marco is a wonderful wrestler. He can also win on his feet, as he proved in his first B2L fight, which he won by decision. This combination could spell trouble for Johnson Johnson. The question is, where will Marco decide to have this fight take place, as his wrestling skills will undoubtedly be the determining factor as to where these two fighters duke it out. It should be interesting to see where Marco feels he has the advantage. And then there were two. The main event features two of the biggest names in B2L’s stable of Heavyweight fighters. Michal Nielamliwy enters this fight 3-1, incidentally suffering his first loss in his last fight against Cain Marco. The twenty-three year old Polish fighter trains out of New World MMA, holds a brown belt in BJJ, and has achieved all three of his victories by way of submission; one of those submission of the night. His opponent is twenty-six year old Hunter Adams. Hunter, fighting out of Cozad MMA, has a two fight win streak at his back, and intends to extend it. Adams holds a purple belt in BJJ himself, but adds to his arsenal with respectable boxing skills. We shall see in the main event whether or not those boxing skills will hamper Nielamliwy’s ability to fight the ground fight he undoubtedly wants. Interesting match-up to finish off a strong card, I can’t wait to see it.

Well… That was definitely a short run as champion for Harry Hammer. Hello fight fans, Brian Richardson here again with a re-cap of all of events which took place tonight here at Paddy O’Malley’s Bar in downtown Montreal. To be honest, I broke normal journalistic protocol, and may have had one or two or fifteen beers to help enjoy tonight’s event… and to drown the memory of the ungrateful family which has decided to disown me for choosing MMA over another Christmas celebration. Those heartless pricks. Don’t they know I do this to put food on the table damn it! They can all go to hell for all I care, assholes. All I really need in life is my fighting and my good buddy, Jack Daniels. Speaking of jerks, how about Gedeon Nkuwu? That prick apparently felt it was more important for him to shove a whole Christmas ham down his gullet than to actually make weight for this fight. Seven pounds overweight for his fight, that’s a newborn baby. That’s okay though, his family probably loves him now, since he could spend Christmas with them. I guess that’s more important than your job. Right, mom? Anyways, besides that setback which caused the first no contest for B2L since the event we no longer speak of (B2L 2) where the main event and co-main event were cancelled, B2L 9: The Stretch Run was a huge success. Seven hundred people crowded into the bar, making it very difficult for me to get a beer, and forcing me to double-fist the entire night, you know, like a champion. Speaking of champions, B2L has a new one in the middleweight division. Jose Oquendo earned it through a dazzling highlight real deserving kick. Oquendo, despite being taken down twice by the former champion, Harry Hammer, seemed to control the entire fight. When the fight hit the ground, Oquendo would continuously improve his position, leading back to his feet, where he dominated. It was the back to back succession of head kicks which did Hammer in, ending the fight by knockout at 3:05 in the first round, and winning knockout of the night honors for Oquendo. Hammer will undoubtedly have a headache comparable to mine in the morning. The co-main event also happened to be awarded fight of the night honors, and with good reason. Not because it was necessarily a good fight, but because George St pierre got his ass beat. Twice before Mikhail Chivitchian finally knocked him out, St pierre was rocked, knocked down once, and finally caught a brutal combination. With his face. St pierre just did not appear ready for this fight, being lethargic before he even stepped into the ring. Perhaps a training camp error? Perhaps his father keeping him up all night screaming at him that he will never make anything out of his life making chump change writing stupid articles about mixed martial arts events instead of spending time with his family? We may never know. Speaking of training camp errors, how about Rocc Fury? That dude needs some training on how to slip a punch. Maybe some neck exercises as well to help with that glass jaw. My god. Two jabs and the guy wilted like a leaf. I could have stepped in that ring and put up a better fight. It took a mere thirty seconds for Jason Celso to knock Fury’s ass out cold. Kind of sad. Maybe he should give up MMA. While on the subject of giving up, one cannot gloss over the lack of heart shown by Leland Montador. Who submits to being punched? What a pussy. The guy was winning the fight too, it’s not like his opponent, Heavy Hnds, had been dominating the whole fight, and Montador had no real reason to continue. Quite the contrary, the scorecards had Montador winning the first round. So what happened? Did he gas? Or does he just lack the heart to fight at this level of competition? I’ll tell you two guys who absolutely do have heart though, my boys T5 and pablo madureira. What an awesome fight. Those two went at each other with force from the word go. In the first minute of the first round, T5 was knocked down by a slick 1-2 combo by madureira, rocking him. T5 fought his way back, though. For the next three rounds, it was a constant barrage of takedowns, strikes, ground and pound, and submissions. In my opinion, this was the real fight of the night. Chivitchian’s win was impressive, but this fight was a war from start to finish, including a comeback by T5 after being rocked very early, very impressive. The most dominating fight had to be Marshall Law’s fifty second knockout of Jack Rice. Rice did not even appear to have a chance in the ring. All eight of his attempted punches missed. Law on the other hand, managed to hit every one of his shots. Much in the same fashion which won Oquendo his shiny new belt, Law landed a back to back series of head kicks, ending Rice’s night early. Maybe we were watching another champion in the making in the final under card of the night? Vincent Lontrame started off the night with an impressive come-from-behind victory. Jack Mistigris won the first round on all cards with his superior stand up. After that, it was all Lontrame. He managed his win mostly by controlling his opponent, not allowing him to actually perform in the fight. Smothering him. Kind of like my parents try to do to me. Pricks. Well, James Logan no longer has to worry about continuing on unbeaten. He got steamrolled by Leo Cage. Cage showed the power of being the superior wrestler in their fight, as he seemingly took Logan down at will, taking away Logan’s striking advantages. Once on the ground, Cage smothered his opponent with a barrage of submission attempts and ground and pound. Logan appeared lost. After three rounds of his, the judges made the right decision, and awarded Cage the win, and Logan his first loss. Egg Nok also showed the power of wrestling, just in a different way. He managed to stuff seventeen of his opponent, Jimmy Conway’s eighteen takedown attempts. While Conway exhausted himself failing to bring the fight to where he wanted it, Nok picked him apart with countless accurate strikes, which made it even harder for Conway to attempt to win the fight. While Nok’s punches rarely landed, it was the kicks that really won the fight for him. One thing Conway definitely has going for him is a chin, though. He managed to take thirteen head kicks without once being rocked, impressive. Unfortunately, ability to take punishment doesn’t win fights, otherwise I’d be champion of the world. What wins fights is a superior strategy, Egg Nok had it, and got the nod for the W. In all, an excellent night of fights. The following eleven fighters will be given bonuses for their fights tonight: Jose Oquendo Mikhail Chivitchian George St pierre Marshall Law Jack Rice Heavy Hnds Leland Montador T5 pablo madureira Jason Celso Rocc Fury Congratulations to all of them. Now I must bid you ado, as I attempt to drown my broken life some more as I attempt to create a new drink by mixing different types of vodka, rum, and whiskey, wish me luck!

Dana White gave $50000 to save a baby girl's life.

I am currently living out at Tiger Muay Thai in Phuket, Thailand. For those who have ever considered a trip to Thailand to learn Muay Thai, I highly recommend it, awesome experience. That is not the purpose of my post though. About a week ago, the community here found out that one of our trainer's baby girl needed a liver replacement. The entire procedure (surgery and post-op) had a bill of about 1.5 million baht (about 50,000 USD). This is a large bill which would bankrupt just about anyone, even in affluent countries, never mind a Muay Thai trainer from Thailand. So what happened? The community here, a large rag-tag group of misfits from all over the globe came together with parties and training all for the cause of Tup Tim, the little girl. It all culminated in tonight, at the monthly BBQ Beatdown thrown by the camp. This party normally includes food/beer/countless Muay Thai fights and MMA fights. This time something different was added, an auction of goods and services. In addition to numerous private sessions auctioned off by some of the elite coaches out here, Roger Huerta, you know, THE ROGER HUERTA, personally made a trip out here (he is a frequent guest as is), to offer a private lesson as well as autograph gloves/shirts for the auction. In all, we as a relatively small community came up short paying for the bills, as 1.5 million baht really is a lot of money. Not to worry though. Dana White, you may have heard of him, if by some stroke of freak luck you've been living under a rock while being an MMA fan, he's the president of the UFC personally contacted the camp to inform them that he, personally, will cover the expenses of this girl's surgery. Wow. Not only does Dana White and the UFC go out of his way to support many charities, as well as the United States military (I was a proud spectator in the second row at the first Fight for the Troops back in 2008, at Fort Bragg, just before deploying to Afghanistan), he goes out of his way to contact a gym in Thailand, silently, not making it into a news story, and gives money to save a little girls life. I just had to share this with everyone, because I am still dumbstruck by the awesome community which is the MMA community, as well as how great a man, Dana White is, as well as the organization he runs. Wow.

Back by popular demand, Built 2 Last Premier MMA has done it again. What have they done again? Put together an amazing card. After the previous performance, Paddy O’Malley called up Jake Waldren, the owner of B2L, and begged him to host another fight at his bar. He even asked for the event to take place on the busiest night of the year for his bar, Christmas. Apparently patrons of O’Malley’s like to drink away the memory of Christmas as quickly as possible, and really, who can blame them? Mr. Waldren hesitated a bit though. He wasn’t sure if he would be able to put together a successful card on short notice, and convince people to fight on Christmas day. After some deliberation, and talking to some of his key fighters, he decided it was possible, and put together an excellent, exciting card, which even includes a title fight. This just shows the quality of ownership which runs the B2L organization, as well as how great the fighters are within the organization. For this B2L is going back to the old ring which was their tradition until recently when they started incorporating a cage. We shall see if that makes a difference, and additionally, whether or not it will stay. Let’s take a look at the stacked card planned for “(B2L) 9: The stretch run”: The first fight starts this card off with a bang. Vincent Lontrame, a 21 year old, originally from Detroit, comes into this fight with a misleading 5-7 record, which does not show what he is truly capable of. Back in mid-November he won a submission of the night award, which shows the hard work he has been putting into his Jiu-jitsu is paying off. He followed that showing with a dismal decision loss, which he will no doubt try to put behind him as he enters the ring squaring off against his opponent, Jack Mistigris. Those who believe that name sounds familiar are not mistaken, this will be Mistigris’ third fight for B2L, a career he likely wants to extend. Mistigris suffered a brutal TKO loss in his last bout and will want to show his chin is strong enough to handle Lontrame’s superior Muay Thai. These two fighters are so evenly matched that one would have a difficult time making a bet on it and feeling confident. Rocc “Hurricane” Fury has suffered a two losses in a row since joining the B2L roster back in mid-November, and will need to win this event to help his chances at staying on that roster. He will likely try to control his opponent with his superior Muay Thai. This may be a very tall task, as he is set to fight Jason Celso. Those watched B2L 6 undoubtedly remember how Celso smashed the opponent, Dan st pierre’s face into the canvas with his vicious ground and pound. There is little doubt Celso will attempt to repeat that experience, trying to use his wonderful wrestling skill to overpower Fury, and cause another early stoppage. Following that exciting show, comes the most evenly matched fight this writer has ever seen. James Logan, or “Wolverine”, as he likes to be called, will be making his B2L premier in this fight. He will face a tough opponent in Leo Cage, whom has gone 1-1 in his previous B2L fights. Both fighter’s skills are almost identical; Logan has a slight advantage in boxing, but that is it. This fight may come down merely to who is the more intelligent fighter in the ring that night. All I know is I’m glad I am not a bookie trying to make odds on this fight, as it would be nearly impossible. This should be an incredibly exciting fight, I can’t wait to see it. Middleweight, tar tar tar tar tar, or as he will henceforth be known, T5, has been with B2L since day one, when he was knocked out in the first round by Dan Smith. He has fought twice since then, winning submission of the night at B2L: 3. T5 boasts a very well rounded game, which he will need when he faces off against his opponent pablo mardureira. This will be pablo’s second fight since joining B2L 5. He boasts a wonderful Muay Thai game, which he adds to with respectable boxing. He is largely lacking in ground skills though, a weakness T5 will undoubtedly attempt to exploit. The question will be if T5 is capable of withstanding the barrage of blows which will undoubtedly come his way as he attempts to take the fight to the ground. Logan Louis enters this next fight hoping to snap a two fight losing streak. This exciting fighter has won two awards for his fights in the past, one fight of the night, and one knockout of the night. The knockout from one of the most vicious slams in the history of the sport; it resembled more of a professional wrestling move than a MMA slam. His opponent, Gedeon Nkuwu, is not intimidated by Louis’ history. Nkuwu, an import from Congo, will look for his second MMA victory. Nkuwu showed an impressively dominating victory over his first opponent, which propelled his reputation enough to fight someone of Louis’ caliber. This could be one of the highlights on an already bright card. Make sure to watch this fight. Each fight I see on this card seems to make me salivate more in anticipation. The two lightweights, Egg Nok and Jimmy “The Gent” Conway will undoubtedly put on an incredible show. Conway, is a remarkable boxer, a skill he developed as a teen serving prison sentences for mafia related crimes. He also holds a blue belt in Brazilian Jiu-jitsu, and is a veteran of 12 fights. He has done all of this while still only being nineteen years old. Impressive. His twenty-four year old opponent, Egg Nok, will present him with quite a challenge. Egg Nok also has nine fights of experience, including one fight of the night. Nok brings to this fight a well rounded game, which should present many challenges for The Gent. This is yet another match so evenly matched it will be hard to predict. The ring may break under the combined weight of 589 Lbs which will be entering it in the following match. That’s right, the big boys are coming out. Expect this fight to be a brawl, it may come down to who simply has the stronger chin. Heavy Hnds won his B2L premier with an impressive 37 second knockout against Teyark Olso, another strong striker. Leland Montador on the other hand lost his premier by decision to Chris Murney. Expect Montador to come out looking to make a point that he is in fact a top-notch striker, and desperately try to win this fight. Hnds will not make this easy for him though, and will likely try to add to his legend as one of the most devastating strikers in B2L. Jack Rice is trying to make a name for himself in our final undercard, a welterweight fight. The 25 year old Brazilian Jiu-jitsu purple belt has had three fights in his career, all with B2L, winning two by submission. This fight will be his biggest yet, potentially skyrocketing him up the ladder of stardom. Marshall Law, his opponent, will by no means make this an easy task. Law, a 25 fight veteran, is no slouch on the ground either, being a BJJ blue belt, and remarkable wrestler. His real strength is in his hands though. His superb boxing will make a difference in this fight, no question about it. Law, on a 2 fight win streak, wants to show that his days as a so-so fighter are behind him, and that he is the future of the B2L welterweight division. At 28 years old, it is definitely time for him to make a splash. Expect Law to try to win this fight decisively with a knockout in his attempts to prove dominance over others in his weight class. The co-main event of the night pits two welterweight BJJ purple belts against each other. Mikhail Chivitchian, the 25 year old Armenian prodigy, and former UFF champion, has moved to Montreal to make a run at another title. In his previous four fights, he has won three times, two being knockouts of the night, the other a triangle submission. Only once has he had a fight leave the first round. As you can see, Chivitchian is strong both on his feet, and on the ground. His opponent, George St pierre wants to prevent Chivitchian from becoming a household name for B2L viewers. St pierre has had three fights, and won all of them by first round submissions. This 21 year old Canadian will likely try to avoid Chivitchian’s heavy hands and try to take this fight to the ground, leading to an awesome display of grappling, which should be nothing short of exciting. If by now you haven’t already bought your ticket to see these fights, this fight will sway you to run out the door, jump in your car, run over the dog on your way out of the driveway, speed through a school zone, and park your car inside of O’Malley’s bar to ensure you are the first to purchase a ticket. The main event features two of the greatest middleweights fighting today. Not only that, but both love to scrap. This fight will be a war. “The Secret Weapon” Jose Oquendo, enters this fight 6-0, 4 victories by knockout, two of those knockout of the night, and one fight being fight of the night. That not enough? His opponent, Harry Hammer, is 4-0, 3 knockouts, one knockout of the night. These two love to hit people. Oquendo, sponsored by Fight Club clothing, and fighting out of the Knockout Montreal gym, is a Muay Thai striker, and will likely look to use the clinch to his advantage. This will be necessary, since the opponent, fighting out of the Synergy Fight Team Elite camp, is an strong boxer, and will likely control the stand-up fight outside of the clinch. Don’t rule out the possibility of this fight ending up on the ground either. Both fighters hold a blue belt in BJJ, and Hammer is a wonderful wrestler. This fight could show how complete each fighter is. I am so incredibly excited for this fight that I almost forgot to mention the most important part. This fight is for the B2L middleweight championship! It can’t get much better. In fact, rather than finishing this article I’m going to leave mid-sentence to go buy---

There you have it folks, a new champion in the super-heavyweight division. Once again, I am your reporter, Brian Richardson, reporting live from Paddy O’Malley’s bar here in Montreal. We had an exciting night of fights tonight, and before I get to discussing the main event of the evening, I’d like to recap all of the fights which occurred tonight. As expected, the competition was fierce, and there were some excellent fights to watch. The breakdown of finishes went like this: Six decisions, two knockouts, and two submissions. A pretty good breakdown if you ask me. So let’s take a look at how each fight went. The first fight of the night was a lightweight fight between Mike Bremner and John Helmsley. If you remember my pre-fight analysis of this fight, you will remember that I saw Helmsley winning this fight comfortably by submission. Comfortably he did. Not seconds into this fight, Helmsley shot a nice double leg takedown taking away any edge Bremner had in this fight. The referee stood them up not long after, in a controversially quick stand up, considering neither fighter had been on the ground very long, and Helmsley was definitely trying to improve his position. We can never know what a referee really sees in a bout, so I won’t grind him too bad. Luckily, this quick standup did not affect the outcome of the fight. Seconds after the standup, this fight was back on the ground. Helmsley then attempted submission after submission, until he finally caught Bremner in a tight arm bar which ended the fight. This submission won Helmsley his second submission of the night in as many fights, he is quickly making a name for himself as a force to be reckoned with in the lightweight division. The next fight I predicted would be won by Erik Fluggentaggen with the belief that his prior chin problems had been rectified. Well I was right in once sense, his chin held up throughout the fight, lasting until a decision. What I forgot was how superior Vitali Klitschko’s striking is. Klitscho landed 167 of 168 attempted strikes. That’s a 99.4% connection rating, that’s incredible. Fluggentaggen managed to hit his target zero times. That’s perfectly understandable though, when you throw one punch the entire fight. Seriously, how do you step into a fight, any fight, disregard that this was a professional mixed martial arts fight, and throw ONE PUNCH in fifteen minutes of action? That’s embarrassing. Granted, he attempted twelve takedowns, but the keyword here is attempted. He didn’t try to adjust his game plan once it became obvious that this fight wasn’t going to the ground. This fight was just a one sided beat down. Fluggentaggen better get to the gym and work on his striking a little more. Luckily, I didn’t make the same mistake predicting the next fight, which was nearly equally as lopsided. Nigel York successfully landed 95.4% of his strikes against Steve Fox. When I predicted York would win this, I was not expecting it to be that handedly. Fox, like Fluggentaggen, was essentially useless on his feet, scoring no strikes, at least he tried though, throwing 21 strikes. He also attempted twenty-seven takedowns, almost a takedown every thirty seconds, and scored on one of them. York tried one takedown, and got it. I actually felt bad for Fox at one point, considering this was his first fight as a professional, and he got so badly decimated. Marcus De Paula knew exactly what his opponent, Pit Bull, intended to do to him in this fight. Pit Bull wanted to clinch, then beat the ever loving shit out of De Paula with his massively better Muay Thai. All De Paula had to do in this fight was avoid the clinch and he might have had a better outcome. I guess that’s easier for me to say as a reporter than a fighter, because Pit Bull caught De Paula in the clinch early, and pounded on him from start to finish. Bull also threw 104 leg kicks, and landed 102 of them. If you don’t think that affected De Paula’s game, you’re so incredibly wrong it hurts. For an idea of how badly this affected De Paula, go down to your local bar, tap some guy on the shoulder, and ask him politely to kick you in the thigh as hard as he can 102 times. If you’re lucky, he’s just some random goon at the bar, and you’ll only be in excruciating pain for about a week, if he happens to be a world-class Muay Thai fighter like Pit Bull, you more than likely will be in a wheel chair for a while. With the fifth fight I expected Peter Just’s black belt in BJJ to be too much for Dam Mouth, and what do you know, I was right. It was all just a matter of time before Just managed to bring the fight to the ground, and as soon as it got there, it was obviously all over for Mouth. Just’s ability was just too much, scoring with strong ground and pound until Mouth gave up his back, at which point Just sunk the hooks in and won with a rear-naked choke. I have to be honest, the Robbie McSlaughter, matheus madureira fight surprised me. I expected McSlaughter to spend the fight being cautious of madureira’s takedowns and end up winning by decision through his superior striking. Man was I wrong. McSlaughter came out swinging, knocked madureira down early, cut him open, then finished him off with a TKO caused by countless hooks to his opponent’s face in just 1:38. This impressive display of striking prowess won McSlaughter KO of the night. This knockout victory was nothing short of impressive, and undoubtedly shocked many people as they now will take notice of McSlaughter’s fighting abilities. The other rookie making a premier tonight, Georges Dunston, did not fair much better than his peer, Fox. He at least scored where he is strong, with four of his five takedown attempts being successful. That was not nearly enough for him to beat George St. Pierre though. St. Pierre slaughtered this poor young man. Once the fight hit the ground, St. Pierre went to work with a vicious ground and pound game, which, eventually, won him the unanimous decision victory. The final under card was about as much of a mismatch as I predicted. It took all of two punches for Nathan Matos to knockout his opponent Vance Gates. Gates shot in for a takedown, and Matos landed a vicious counter hook right on the button. Gates crumbled like a rag doll, and proved he should have never taken the fight in the first place. In the co-main event, I believed that as long as Hannibal Lecter VIII made it out of the first minute of the fight, he would be fine against his opponent Beautiful Boxer. Unfortunately for Lecter, this was not the case. He did manage to make it out of that first minute, and in fact lasted the whole fight. He also managed to amount almost no offense, as Boxer picked him apart with superior boxing and Muay Thai. The fight was so lopsided in Boxer’s favor that at a point, the crowd actually began to boo since the fight had became so boring. It’s impressive when you can make a fight so lopsided that the crowd boos how well you’re doing! Chris Hinmin made his way out to the cage blaring AC/DC’s Thunderstruck. Ironically, he looked pretty thunderstruck himself by the time the fight was over. Hinmin’s wrestling was not enough to secure him the super-heavyweight title tonight. On the other hand, our new super-heavyweight champion, Chris Murney, showed he is worthy of his new position with this fight. He scored with almost all of his strikes, then, almost as if to add insult to injury scored 13 of 14 takedown attempts against Hinmin. Why he continued to take Hinmin down, I do not understand, because Hinmin’s ground and pound was doing significant damage, and added a risk to Murney’s otherwise sure victory. Murney’s overall dominance in this fight secured him the victory, however; it also allows him to have a nice new shiny belt that he can put in his trophy room. Good luck to Murney with his title run, he definitely deserved the belt tonight. In all, we had an incredibly exciting night of fights tonight, and to show his appreciation, the owner of B2L, Jake Waldren, gave out many bonuses tonight, here is the list of everyone who won an additional bonus tonight: Chris Murney Chris Hinmin John Helmsley Robbie McSlaughter Nathan Matos Peter Just George St. Pierre Georges Dunston matheus madureira Pit Bull Marcus De Paula Nigel York Steve Fox Vitali Klitschko Erik Flugentaggen Congratulations to all of you, and thank you to all of the fighters who put on an excellent show tonight, we look forward to seeing you all in the future, this is Brian Richardson signing out.

Reporter: Today we are back at the BODYROCK gym here in downtown St. Petersburg, talking to Ajarn Max, who will be facing Jimmy Cricket at Soviet 2. Ajarn is Thai, and speaks broken English, so please bear with him. Yesterday, we spoke with two members of his camp, Aries Henderson and Ray Elbe. We shall see today if Ajarn continues the tradition of seeming overconfidence which appears to be a hallmark of his team. *Camera scans gym, showing Aries arguing with a make up artist over which type of eyeliner will make his eyes look better for the post fight interview, and Elbe, obviously shitfaced, dancing in his underwear, swinging a towel over his head, and slapping the ass of everyone who walks by. Camera then focuses on a Thai man with crazy hair continuously kicking a heavy bag with such force that the bag may eventually flip over the bar which suspends it. The bag has a picture of his Jimmy Cricket’s face on it.* Reporter: Hello, Ajarn, we’re here from the SFC interview team here to conduct the interview with you. Max: Hello, nice meet you. Me happy interview. Reporter: Ajarn, would you like to talk about your upcoming opponent, Jimmy Cricket? Max: He look like lady boy. Me knock out. BOOM! Reporter: Cricket has been said to be superb boxer, how do you expect to counteract that? Max: Boxing! Bah! *spits* Me Muay Thai. Muay Thai kill boxing. He only twenty. He only box few years. Me Muay Thai whole life. Me first pro fight 12 year old. I win. He lose. Reporter: How many Muay Thai fights have you had? Max: Three hundred. Reporter: Three hundred fights?! Are you serious? Max: Yes, me fight every two weeks since twelve years old. Me fight MMA to show power of Muay Thai to world. Reporter: That’s impressive. What was your reco--- Henderson: Hey yo, scribe, which eye looks better? Reporter: Excuse me? Henderson: Which eye looks better, left or right? Reporter: I guess right? Henderson: Thank you. *turns to make up artist and starts yelling* See! I told you bitch! The one on the right looks better, even white boy writer here can see that. How fuck you justify chargin’ me $100 an hour for this? Reporter: Sorry about that Ajarn. As I was saying, what was your record as a Muay Thai fighter? Ajarn: 210 win, 60 loss, 30 draw. 170 knockout. Me champion. Reporter: That’s absolutely incredible. And you say it so matter of factly, like it’s no big deal. I’m actually kind of surprised by how humble you are. Especially considering the rest of your team mates. What are your intentions as a mixed martial artist? Ajarn: Me champion. Me win fight. Cricket squash. *Camera shows Elbe standing behind the reporter holding his finger over his mouth giving the universal sign for “shh”* Reporter: Excellent Ajarn, but I meant after this fight what are your inten--- *Elbe starts pouring beer out on reporter* ---Aw… what the hell? Elbe: Man, you shouldn’t wear suits in a gym. You shoulda known this was coming. I mean how many times you been to a gym and not had a beer poured on you for wearing a suit? Reporter: Never, actually. Elbe: Well, there’s a first time for everything right, man. Speaking of which, you’ve got a real pretty mouth, how’bout a kiss? Reporter: Umm… no? I’m a happily married straight man. Elbe: You callin’ me gay? Reporter: Well you’re in your underwear asking me to kiss you, what else am I to assume? Elbe: Man, it’s not gay if you don’t look each other in the eye and your balls don’t touch. Reporter: I think I have to leave. *Reporter gets up, beer drips off of his suit everywhere* Elbe: Nah man, stay, party’s just getting started, I’m about to pick out my entrance music for the next fight. *Elbe slaps the reporter on the ass* Reporter: Yeah, I’m out of here, you guys are insane. *Reporter starts swiftly moving towards the door* Ajarn: Interview! Interview! Reporter: Sorry, Ajarn, maybe another time, I’ve gotta get out of here, this place is a zoo. Do you people ever train? *Camera turns to Henderson who has just slapped the make up artist* Henderson: Bitch are you fucking stupid?! Blush?! You ever seen a black man with rosy red cheeks before?! *Camera turns back to reporter who is now white as a ghost, and noticeably scared for his life* Reporter: Yeah, time to go. Elbe: Nah man, stay! It’s happy hour! Have a margarita! *Reporter starts literally sprinting for the door* *Elbe catches him, takes him down, and starts dry humping him in the middle of the gym. Camera is then turned off*