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Rambo

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Welcome to the Stoner Fight League (SFL)

 

 

We are the bridge between 340K & unrestricted combat

 

 

 

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The SFL is the remnants of a Tokyo based MMA organization so shady that it made the Yakuza look like Japanese girl scouts. Any record of nefarious or scandalous activity has been erased from history with copious amounts of medical marijuana consumption, bribery, and stoner propaganda.

 

 

 

 
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The SFL hosted its first event in the Saku Dome and the fireworks that ensued propelled the organization into the top 20 worldwide. Even with social distancing restrictions in place preventing a full-capacity arena and COVID-69 forcing fighters off the card, the event managed to break a lot of records for a promotion's debut. BIG records. Really BIG records. The success of this event caused a monumental rift on the MMA scene...

 

 

 

 

 

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The powers behind the SFL saw its rivals crumble overnight when a sudden economic crisis struck 340K. Owners involved in the day-to-day activities of their organization mysteriously vanished without a trace, leaving entire rosters of fighters and their managers in limbo. The ownership of SFL arranged a corporate takeover so ruthlessly efficient that it impressed oligarchs and other world leaders.

 

 

 

 

 

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Following the shadiest backdoor deals in MMATycoon history, Commie-level corporate takeovers, and extortion of epic proportions, the SFL relocated its HQ from Tokyo to Amsterdam.

 

 

 

 

 
340K ID Restricted
 
Open Door Policy
 
Lucrative FOTN Awards
 
Sponsors (Convicted, Conquer, Savage)
 
Fair & Competitive Fights
 
Discord Channel
 
Large Staff *

 

 

* due to corona season please wash your hands before touching our staff

 

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Reporter : Are the rumours true?


Rishkinov : They are. I got offered big money from other organisations to go and fight for them but i sat down with Mr Karter and his team and they have sold me the dream. Lets just say big fights will be happening very soon.




Reporter : You have been champion in 3 different organisations now and avenged nearly every defeat. What do you wish to accomplish in SFL?


Rishkinov : I want to be successful. The main aim is to be champion at 170lbs but i'm itching to be multiple weight champion. Lets just say i offered to go 155lbs but i heard a few rumours the fighters in that weight division weren't too keen on that. Ive also been champion at 185lbs so thats another option.



Reporter : Edison Atunes???


Rishkinov : your putting words in my mouth haha. He is a great champion and unbeaten so if that fight ever got made i would be honoured to share a cage with him. Lets concentrate on trying to secure 170 first. Seem big names have been mentioned thats all i can say.



Reporter : you mentioned about the 155lbs divison not being keen on seeing you at that weight , can you explain any further?


Rishkinov : I think they see me as a danger, not many fighters at this level , do what i do. A lot of them have great stand-up but thats about it.





Rishkinovs phone starts to ring..



Rishkinov : can you give me 2 minutes please. Its Chris Karter




minutes pass




Reporter : Everything okay?


Rishkinov : Sorry about that , my first fight has been confirmed. Karter likes to talk. I have permission to give you an exclusive. My first fight will be at 170lbs against one of my heroes : Litill Bjornsson. Hes stepping up in weight so props for that. Iv e watched him from the start of his career. My manager actually owned IFA on the island at one point so ive watched him live a few times. Also got told he also popped once or twice over on the island. Lets hope hes all clear now.



Reporter : Are you serious? Mini Mountain, He has over 38 fights. He is a legend of the sport


Rishkinov : They get shit done here. I wanted big fights and to test myself against the greats and they have pulled it out the bag.16th August Tokyo . The greatest 25 yr old 340k creation goes against the greatest 340k project. On that note. Im outta here



BEAST FROM THE EAST




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LIVE with CHRIS KARTER and MISS MIRACLE

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Big announcements. Exciting stuff. Let's talk about the recent signings to the organization. Really big things on the horizon and we'll keep making moves, keep pissing excellence, and keep our foot on the throats of the competition until we take over the world! Er, uh, I mean the 340K ID restricted division...

 

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Edison "Zico" Atunes

16-0-0 ( MW | P4P 34 )

 

With 15 knockouts in 16 victories the RFC champion is hands down without a doubt the most dangerous young fighter on the planet. He decimated the entire RFC division. He spanks his opponents harder than his manager spanks himself. He is unquestionably the best Middleweight in the world. However, Marky Mark did tell me about the 14-0 undefeated Pete Parrot --

 

Sir, it's Pate "The Finnish Experiment" Parret...

 

Pate? Are you sure? Shit, I've been callin' him Pete. No wonder he hasn't called me back. Been tryin' to poach sign that guy for weeks.

 

 

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"Beast from the East" Serhey Rishikov

16-4-0 ( WW | P4P 43 )

 

I can assure you that Serhey's connections to the Red Devil Cartel had nothing to do with him signing here. Absolutely nothing. Those rumors of a private jet with unsolicited amounts of illegally laundered cash are unfounded. He was eager to compete against the very best and he came here with the aspiration to climb on top of a Mini Mountain, but this Mini Mountain in particular doesn't like to be climbed on...

 

 

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Litill "Mini Mountain" Bjornsson

35-3-0 ( LW | 11 P4P )

 

The legendary fighter who went to the Island and conquered it. This Icelander needs little introduction, it don't matter who you are or who you fought, 24 submission victories in mmatycoon is defying the RNG gods and mechanics of the multi-verse. He's been accused of crushing cans in the past by casuals like Camara, but him signing here and moving up a weight class to take on the Beast from the East proves what most already knew. Haters gonna hate.

 

 

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Reijo Halli

10-2-1 ( FW | P4P 68 )

 

Reijo Halli debuted at SFL 1 with a slick submission when he synced up a triangle in the 2nd round following a reversal by his opponent. Things were a little shady in Tokyo, and he probably deserved a submission of the night award. Reijo was a free agent and had many suitors but ultimately he couldn't resist the large staff at the SFL. We swing a big stick and so does he, and this signing immediately bolsters the featherweight division.

 

 

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Anthony Cirelli

11-4-0 ( LW | P4P 125 )

 

Anthony Cirelli comes from the infamous stable of infamous midgets --

 

He was actually on Clubber Winger's roster before he signed with the Midget King...

 

That explains why he's not ranked higher. Well, now that he's signed with a dwarf specialist, I expected he'll shoot up the ranks in no time. Aylib really likes to get his hands on little guys and change their careers --

 

Sir are you still talking about fighting and MMA?

 

I'm not sure. I've always wondered what his infatuation with little people was. You know what, next time we're gonna sign one of his fighters I know this little gutter down in Hialeah with a midget stripper, perfect for him. We'll take him there.

 

How much does she charge for a dance?

 

I don't know, but she charges $20 for a blowjob.

 

Really?

 

Yeah, you pick her up by her ankles and let her go to work. She's a professional.

 

 

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Gabriel "Tarantula" Torres

13-4-0 ( WW | 424 P4P )

 

The Tarantula is a former Bloodbath champion and an Underground title contender. A black belt in Jiu-Jitsu this welterweight from Puru is always dangerous. There's rumors he was bitten by a radioactive spider. That shit gives me the creeps. I don't fuck with spiders bro. But I'm cool with Torres, and look forward to watching him in the SFL cage.

 

 

That is an all-star cast of young fighters. Do you have any thing else you'd like to add to the readers?

 

Rocket made us a badass new org logo. We know White Jesus is offensive in 2020, but we felt like Hippy Jesus could still unite people together under one banner towards a common cause.

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I am proud of recruiting a few of these fighters back in the golden era of RFC and i gotta tell ya that Bjornson is a freak of nature .

We ve been throwing everything we had on him and he always emerged vistorious !!! I ve never seen an undertrained Island fighter beat fully trained prospects so easily.

 

Not much to say about Edison Antunes . He is untouchable . Edison probably is a future #1 P4P fighter ! Insane KO power backed by Marcus's high IQ tactics.

 

Cirelli has been an underachiever under his previous management but i am sure that he will be a future champ under Aylib .

 

If it wasnt for SFL ,340K was done for good.... Keep up the good job guys !

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I am proud of recruiting a few of these fighters back in the golden era of RFC and i gotta tell ya that Bjornson is a freak of nature .

We ve been throwing everything we had on him and he always emerged vistorious !!! I ve never seen an undertrained Island fighter beat fully trained prospects so easily.

 

Yes that was crazy with Bjornsson, made two fighters for my first time on the island and didn't know what to expect. While I did figure out a few things with the sliders along the way I certainly didn't feel I deserved to win all those fights. Some of them were closer than it looks like from just seeing his record so must have been some luck involved as well. Will soon find out if there is any more where that came from.

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Big news incoming...

 

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"The Fattest Mother F*cker" Techno Viking

12-1-0 (SHW | 94 P4P)

 

Don't try to interview the Viking. He hasn't stopped dancing since he got here. That fucking music is awful. He wants to stay in the SFL forever but we're not sure how long we can tolerate that painful music. No, I'm not bitter that my fighter Kilo bled on him after dominating for 2 rounds. This post isn't about Kilo, this is about The Viking... and we have a huge fight lined up for him in his debut. Stay tuned.

 

 

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Bleeding Spanner

14-2-0 (HW | 89 P4P)

 

We discovered this Irish hooligan's real identity is Blakely Spanner. He is notorious on the Dublin bare-knuckle fighting circuit and in the underground arena of fisticuffs he has almost reached the popularity of the Rocky McColgan's and Ozzy McKane's of Ireland. Perhaps the most highly anticipated rematch in all of ID history awaits this heavyweight striker.

 

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"The Sandman" Reginald Budgiehandler

14-4-0 (FW | 387 P4P)

 

Another top prospect from Kelly's stable of warriors enters the midst of our little warriors. You wouldn't expect this pint-sized gentleman to pack such a heavyweight sized punch! The Sandman puts everything he touches to sleep with 93% of his wins coming by way of knockout that has seen him earn 6 OTN bonuses. Reginald takes on Cirreli at SFL 03 in a fight that should set the tone for the rest of the featherweight division.

 

 

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Sir I think you're forgetting somebody...

 

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Colin Kaepernick

12-3-0 (MW | 485 P4P)

 

I couldn't forget about him fast enough. If there was ever somebody that needed to be forgotten, believe me, it's this guy.

 

But he is a prospect in the division. He is managed by Convicted Inc manager Marcus Crassus but has no sponsorship offers? Will you at least get him some sponsors he has been e-mailing us non-stop.

 

Hell no. Do I look like Nike to you?

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The following three-chapter anthology has been compiled from numerous first hand accounts to give the audience an exclusive insight into the background, decisions, and events that fueled the inception and rise of Stoner Fight League.

 

 

Stoner Fighting League: From Seed to Weed

 

 

Chapter 1: Bad Trips in Japan

 

Gifted a samurai sword in adolescence by stepfather Alex K after proving his worth, Christopher Karter fell in love with Japan at an early age.

 

 

SdqIKdg.jpgStepdad Alex K bequeaths Karter his prized katana after a hard-fought battle, shortly before attempting hara-kiri and temporary retirement

 

 

Enamored with all things Nipponese, from the code of Bushido and Danza Kaduro to censored pornography, Karter, sensing a monumental opportunity in the Tycooniverse, bestows upon the island nation the honor of hosting not just a new org, but a new kind of org. Danzai.

 

 

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Karter, arriving to Tokyo Bay in the spirit of Commodore Matthew Perry and the outfit of Oda Nabunaga

 

 

Always the provocateur, Karter selects the 4th of July as the date to inaugurate his org.

 

This, according to reports, is where his relationships with powerful and shadowy figures in the Japanese fighting scene began to break down.

 

The Yakuza interlocutors that Karter’s Kartila Madan connections introduced him to were of the real old school type. Right wing extremists and nationalists with an obsessive commitment to discipline. And honor.

Grumblings turned into outright hostilities after Karter announced plans to rip the centuries-old cherry blossom trees surrounding his pagoda compound out by their roots to enable cultivation of his favorite plant.

 

The Yakuza, outraged by the desecration of their national symbol, dispatch a squad of enforcers to “persuade” Karter against the idea.

 

 

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The Yakuza, in formation, strike an intimidating pose to send Karter a strong message

 

 

“Karter-san! The foul stench of your Zassō plant plagues the Land of the Rising Sun. You rack disciprin. And Honor!” the leader of the goon squad shouts.

Fearing Karter’s temperamental nature, the Convicted brass dispatches translator and cross-cultural communications expert Hei Long King to defuse the situation.

 

Just as the parties appear to be establishing mutual respect and understanding, a puff of red hair becomes visible over the Garden wall and quick as you know it, Karter vaults over the top in the direction of the Yakuza screaming “BANZAI” at the top of his lungs and empties his bucket, heretofore filled with “fertilizer”, on top of the henchmen like a divebomber before crashing into the group kamikaze style, flailing his limbs in all directions.

 

Badly beaten and covered in all manner of bodily fluid, the Yakuza beat a hasty retreat.

 

The euphoria of victory would, however, turn to anguish once it dawns on Convicted that it has most likely worn out its welcome in Japan.

 

 

Chapter Two published here (and below)

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Read Chapter 1

 

Chapter 2: Blazing Inspiration

 

Convicted leadership sit down for a soul-searching strategy session to figure out how to proceed and what lessons to take from the Japanese ordeal.

 

The meeting is off to a rough start.

 

“Guys, please focus. As reigning new manager of the year, I must uphold a certain standard of excellence” Hei Long King.

 

“Can’t we just smoke a bowl and watch puppy videos?” asks Karter, incredulously.

 

“No. And to answer your previous questions, you can’t roll up a fatty or rip that bong, either” King responds.

 

“What’s the most you ever smoked Chris?” asks Marcus Crassus with a twinkle in his eye, clearly attempting to egg Karter on.

 

“Let’s talk about what went wrong with Danzai” King interjects.

 

“Damn chinks are too touchy” says Karter, without missing a beat as he stares longingly at the kush in middle of the conference room table.

 

“I think what Karter is trying to say is that we didn’t fully appreciate the differences between American culture and Japanese culture” King translates. “Let’s not repeat that mistake in the future, wherever we move.”

 

Karter, who hadn’t been paying attention finally breaks down and grabs the buds, sprinkling a healthy portion onto a trusty bowl he keeps on his person at all times.

 

“What we need is just to get down to…” Karter begins to say before torching the herb.

 

The table sits in silence for 20 seconds, waiting intently for the conclusion of his thought as Karter takes a long inhale.

 

Karter burns the bowl all the way down to dust and makes the party wait as he holds the smoke in his lungs for an additional full two minutes.

 

“…the basics” he coughs.

 

“I think what Karter is trying to say is that we should continue with the aspects that have made Convicted the perennial success it is today. Very well put, Chris” says King, encouragingly.

 

“What do you have in mind” asks Crassus, trying to hold back a snicker.

 

Karter, now completely baked out of his mind replies “Weed. And… and White Jesus.”

 

“I think what Karter is trying to say is…”

 

“Weed and White Jesus. That’s what we’re going with. Meeting adjourned” says Karter.

 

And thus, Stoner Fight League was born.

 

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Third and final chapter in the foundational story published here (and on next page)

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Guys I would really appreciate of you reach out to me before negotiating fights with my champions / managers.

 

I have never declined in the past if the fight/date makes sense with our calendars. My next 3 events are booked and contenders have expectations so I am happy to if the stars align (date/hype/location/division being affected).

 

Thank you.

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Guys I would really appreciate of you reach out to me before negotiating fights with my champions / managers.

 

I have never declined in the past if the fight/date makes sense with our calendars. My next 3 events are booked and contenders have expectations so I am happy to if the stars align (date/hype/location/division being affected).

 

Thank you.

 

Thank you for your message, we at Stoner Fight League take your concerns very seriously.

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Thank you for your message, we at Stoner Fight League take your concerns very seriously.

 

You should. It`s a valid concern.

 

@karter I am happy to have my champ at 145 fight your guy at FARTMMA 112.

 

Let me know via PM , post on my thread, post here and message me. Whatever method you want just give me a heads up pls.

 

lol just noticed thsi is the guy I fired from SYN so added @karter

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You should. It`s a valid concern.

 

@karter I am happy to have my champ at 145 fight your guy at FARTMMA 112.

 

Let me know via PM , post on my thread, post here and message me. Whatever method you want just give me a heads up pls.

 

lol just noticed thsi is the guy I fired from SYN so added @karter

 

PM sent.

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@karter I am happy to have my champ at 145 fight your guy at FARTMMA 112.

 

Unlike your slave driving organization, we won't road block a super fight.

 

But if Reijo Halli doesn't want to go to an org with that name, I'll pay you 100K to stfu and send him for 1 fight.

 

Sincerely,

The KO King

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