Jump to content

Chronicles Of Chris Karter


Rambo

Recommended Posts

  • 3 weeks later...

tumblr_nh854gqhzo1qhd14co2_500.gif
Chris Karter's brain on drugs revealed in a social experiment conducted by Sir Manuel Tosen

Amsterdam - SFL HQ

Knock. Knock. Knock.

The entire SFL staff is in the facility when a random knock at the front door draws their attention. Mannetosen, being the largest person in the room, walks up to the door.

"Who is it?" Mannetosen ask.

"It's me guys." A sniveling French accent whelped from the other side.

Mannetosen opens the door and sees Bjorn O'Donnel.

"Can I come in? It's raining..." Bjorn ask as he avoids eye contact with Mannetosen, who towers over him, fist clenched.

Mannetosen instantly shuts the door in Bjorn's face and walks away grumbling. "It was either that or flog him to death."

TJ gets up and walks over to the door shaking his head. "That's messed up guys. I like a diversified group. That's why I hang out here."

TJ opens the door, Bjorn is still standing there, soak and wet. TJ notions for him to come inside. As Bjorn wipes a tear drop from his eye and steps in the door, another duplicate steps into the doorway.

"Greetings gentlemen." Akila Webb says with a bow of his head. Unlike Bjorn, he had an umbrella and his suit was dry. "We appreciate your hospitality."

TJ looks back a little unsure of his selfless gesture. "Guys there's two of em."

Karter chuckles as he nibbles on some psychedelic mushrooms. "Belgium's are emerging."

Bjorn tip toes behind Akila trying to put his hand in his pocket but Atilla calmly swats it away, Bjorn lingering behind with every step. Nobody in the room is talking any more, just watching the circus act of Belgium's Of Mice and Men operate. Antifa walks over to a couch and takes a seat, crossing a leg over his knee.

Bjorn awkwardly stands alone. He finally musters the courage to speaks up.

tenor.gif

Rocket suddenly draws a switchblade and lunges at him. "We've solved the algorithm! He's the fuckin' GOAT!"

"Algorithm? Goat? What are you talking about?" Bjorn whimpers as Rocket presses the blade up against his neck. Rocket points to Antifa's lap which Bjorn hastily retreats to and sits down. Antifa rocks Bjorn back and forth cradling his trembling Belgium countrymen.

"Yo Karter." Akila speaks in perfect English, like Bjorn he too is fluent in eleven languages. "Can you please be so kind to elaborate on this algorithm?"

Karter's eyes widen as a batty smile stretches across his face. "The Algorithm of Dave."

"Dave's not here man." Louie mutters from the corner of the room. "Dave's gone."

Louie's solemn words capture the attention of the entire room as he points to the back wall revealing a text more mysterious than the ancient Egyptian hieroglyphs. Even the brilliant minds of the two walking Belgium Rosetta Stone's couldn't process the complexity of the formula.

hR8wSYN.jpg

Akila raises a brow. "You've... solved... this?"

Karter smiles confidently and nods his head. "Oh yeah."

"Impressive." Akila concedes to the obvious. "The results?"

 

Rocket growls. "He's the GOAT."

Silence ensued for several long moments as they continue to examine the text. Alika can't find any holes in that theory.

"We're goin' all in on big tech. Now's the time to invest!" a random voice breaks the silence as Money Mayweather emerges from the bathroom followed by a thick cloud of smoke. He's shouting into his phone. "Think solar! Space! Colonizing mars by 2040! I want Richard Branson and Elon Musk sitting down for lunch by tomorrow! Money Mayweather out!" He hangs up and looks around the room of mostly blank glares.

"Who the fuck is this Money Mayweather?" TJ being the private moderator, regulator of all things, and partisan rule bender, felt obligated to speak up. "I googled him and I didn't find."

"Who the fuck is this guy?" Money Mayweather points at TJ, speaking to Karter. "Is he a fuckin' narc? He looks like a fuckin' narc."

"It's cool." Karter says, still smiling wide. "He's our narc."

"I'm not a narc. I'm cool. Do I look like a narc to you?" TJ pleads his case to Mayweather.

"You're the narc-iest mother fucker I've ever seen!" Money Mayweather looks over to Bjorn. "I lied. THAT's the narc-ist mother fucker I've ever seen! What the fuck is Bjorn doing here?"

"Hi Mayweather." Bjorn raises his hand in the air, thankfully Atilla lowers it for him. "It's raining outside. I didn't expect to see you here. Do you like Volkswagons? I think I like Volkswagons."

"Volkswagons are gay." Karter blurts out.

Bjorn smiles. "I think I might get one."

Rocket throws a knife in Bjorn's direction! Unfortunately for Mannetosen, Rocket misses. Rocket can't believe it. Karter walks over and speaks to him before the Space Cowboy could boil over with rage.

"You have to, like, find the balance between accuracy and damage, like, be aggressive man, but counter the energy." Karter points into the air and Rocket appears zoned in to every word the ginger king speaks. "Predictions. You have to totally use your prediction sliders bro, and farming, hiddenly... wolf juice, but no elbows. Float like butterfly, be like water, bull shark testosterone."

"Guys." Bjorn speaks up again, interrupting the slider lesson. "Is my mom still here?"

"No Baby Bjorn." Rocket suddenly speaking sarcastically and without aggression. "Your mum's only here on the weekends."

Knock. Knock. Knock.

Interrupted once more by a random knock. TJ walks over to the door and answers it this time. It's Mike Tycoon.

CxRaEz.gif

Rocket points to the bathroom with a whimsical grin. "Bjorn's mum's in the bathroom."

 

"I hope she's got a granite chin like Paddy." Mike says as he walks by Bjorn and winks to his mate.

  • Upvote 6
  • Downvote 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • 1 month later...

(couldn't find my Kilo "Bloodbath" Maluga thread)


1606604323ezgif.com-gif-maker.gif




LINK TO FULL FIGHT




lMyqQhS.png



Maluga drops Tower with a big left hand! Tower is injured, injured bad! Maluga jumps in and finished him with strikes! The fight is over!



Ladies and gentlemen, after 0:49 of round 3, we have a winner by way of TKO (Strikes). Kilo Maluga!



Kilo Maluga is the new heavyweight champion! An out of breath Kilo Maluga thanked his loyal fans in his post fight interview, giving them credit for his success over the course of his career.



20120325031119synbeltnew.jpg



14390840437078.png


"Without the fans, there is no Kilo. I make this sacrifice to the just bleed gods. To my opponent, Iain Tower, you are a tough fucker. Rocco sends his regards from the Bahamas."


  • Upvote 4
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.

Guest
Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Paste as plain text instead

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.

Loading...
×
×
  • Create New...