PBP Commentary

Coming up we have a heavyweight MMA rules bout between Schmorgen Biscuit (ranked 675 p4p, 91 weight class) and Vladimir Impaler (ranked 903 p4p, 119 weight class). There are an array of beautiful celebrities at ringside tonight! I wonder if any of them paid for their tickets.

Biscuit
vs
Impaler

183 cm
28
230 lbs
21 - 15 - 0

215 cm
28
275 lbs
22 - 12 - 0

Great wrestler
World class boxer
Cardio machine

Good wrestler
World class boxer
Good gas tank

HGH Nutrients Q160 Tycoons Best Quality supps
Sportivité

Ladies and gentlemen. This fight is 3 rounds, in the heavyweight division.
Introducing the fighter to my left, fighting out of the red corner.
With a record of 21 - 15 - 0, fighting out of Los Angeles, Schmorgen Biscuit!
And introducing the fighter to my right, fighting out of the blue corner.
With a record of 22 - 12 - 0, fighting out of London, Vladimir Impaler!
The judges for this bout are Jack Bonds, Timothy Bukovac and .

The bell rings for round one and we are underway!
Impaler misses with a looping right.

Biscuit shoots in and gets a takedown into Impaler's guard.
Biscuit postures up in Impaler's guard and throws a big left but Impaler blocks it.
Impaler controlling Biscuit's posture.
Biscuit stands up over Impaler, holding his feet. He dives back in and lands a decent shot to the head.
Biscuit working some ground and pound from guard but it's not doing any damage.
Biscuit being controlled here momentarily.
We've had a slow start to the round here - hopefully the action picks up.
Biscuit throws a big elbow that misses.
The ref warns both fighters not to hold the cage as they work up against the meshing.
Biscuit landing with the ground and pound.
Biscuit working some ground and pound from guard but it's not doing any damage.
Biscuit has been looking to land a fair amount of strikes on the ground. He might be looking to soften his opponent up in order to work for a submission.

That's one minute gone in the round.
Biscuit trying to land body shots but he keeps hitting the mat.
Biscuit stands up and looks to throw the legs aside to pass to side control. Impaler swivels though and keeps the full guard.
Impaler is doing well to control the posture of his opponent and prevent any damage.
Biscuit throws a big right hand that misses.
Impaler keeping moving, preventing Biscuit from controlling successfully.
Biscuit is working Impaler over from the guard. He should look to pass the guard and do a little more damage with these strikes.
Biscuit engaging in some classic timewasting tactics.

That's two minutes gone in the round.
The crowd are getting on the fighters' backs, as the pace has dropped off in the last minute or so.
Impaler working the defensive guard well to avoid strikes from Biscuit.
Impaler preventing the ground and pound from doing any damage.
Biscuit throws a big elbow that misses.
Biscuit with a nice head shot there.
Impaler seems keen to control rather than go for a submission, at least for now.
Impaler avoiding any damage from the ground and pound.
Biscuit looking to control the position here, rather than advance.
It looks like the ref is thinking about a standup.
Biscuit postures up and lands a big shot to Impaler's brow.

That's three minutes gone in the round.
Biscuit lands a nice shot whilst sitting in his opponent's guard.
Impaler keeping full guard, as Biscuit tries to pass.
Impaler being controlled here, momentarily.
Impaler is working an open guard here, looking to improve his position. No doubt that will leave him open to counters but at least he's being more offensive.
Impaler lands a beautiful sweep and he's now moved into his opponent's guard.

Impaler wants to stand but Biscuit is controlling his posture from full guard.
Biscuit pulls Impaler in close to prevent any damage.

That's four minutes gone in the round.
Impaler looking to pass the guard.
Biscuit is trying to control the position but Impaler postures up.
Biscuit tries to land a sweep but no joy.
Impaler wants to pass the guard but Biscuit is keeping the position.
Biscuit managing to control the position.
Impaler trying to control the position from guard on top but Biscuit is wriggling around, looking for whatever he can.
Boooooooooooooooooooo!!! God, this has been a terrible round. Come on you two, sort yourselves out!
Biscuit tries to land a sweep but no joy.
Impaler wants to stand but Biscuit is controlling his posture from full guard.
Impaler trying to control the position from guard on top but Biscuit is wriggling around, looking for whatever he can.

The referee decides to stand the fighters back up.
And that’s the end of the round – the fighters go back to their corners.

Schmorgen Biscuit dominated that round.
The fighters get back to their feet, the hooter sounds and we're back to the action!

Biscuit moves into the clinch.
Biscuit misses with a hook to the ribs.
Biscuit missing with knees to the body.
Good body shot from Biscuit.
Biscuit has dropped down and is looking to force the takedown but it's defended by Impaler after a bit of a struggle.
Biscuit throws an elbow but it's blocked.
Biscuit drops to a knee looking for a takedown but Impaler gets the underhooks and prevents it.
Biscuit wants a takedown.
That's three failed takedown attempts in the round for Schmorgen Biscuit. That's going to take a lot out of him.
Biscuit gets an overhook and lands an elbow to the side of the head.

It looks like Vladimir Impaler has been cut.
Impaler gets through Biscuit's defenses to land a nice punch to the side of the head.

It looks like Schmorgen Biscuit has been cut.
Impaler pushes Biscuit back against the cage and lands a hook to the side of the head.
We've had a slow start to the round here - hopefully the action picks up.
Impaler tries to work over Biscuit's body with a swooping hook but it only glances the target.
Impaler fails to land with a short punch on the inside.
Biscuit throws a hook to the body. More of an arm punch but it's all scoring with the judges.
Impaler lands a hook that snaps the head of Biscuit backwards.
Biscuit lands a hook to the side of the head.
Biscuit blocks a body shot from Impaler.

Biscuit is working on a single leg takedown against the cage. Impaler can't fight it off and eventually Biscuit manages to take the fight to the floor. Impaler looks annoyed but at least he's managed to land in guard.

That's one minute gone in the round.
Impaler keeping moving, preventing Biscuit from controlling successfully.
Impaler avoiding any damage from the ground and pound.
Biscuit is looking to work some ground and pound but Impaler has wrist control.
Impaler is trying to stand up but he's not managed so far.
Biscuit wants to control from the top but Impaler keeps moving.
Biscuit working some ground and pound from guard but it's not doing any damage.
Biscuit is looking to work some ground and pound but Impaler has wrist control.
We must be close to a standup if these guys don't pick up the pace.
Biscuit trying to control but Impaler is working from the bottom.

That's two minutes gone in the round.
My god... these two guys really need to pick up the pace or everyone will leave to go get a beer.
Impaler is pulling down on Biscuit's head to control his posture.

The referee has decided to stand the fighters back up, so we'll restart on the feet.
Impaler throws a body shot but no joy.
Biscuit fails with a takedown attempt.
Biscuit throws a poor cross that misses
letting Impaler counter with a right hand.
Impaler lands with an overhand left.
Biscuit is trying hard to land a takedown here. Impaler sprawls well and keeps this one on the feet.
Biscuit misses with an uppercut. Impaler saw that one coming.
A nice side step and Impaler releases a counter shot to the body, but it doesn't find it's home.
A jab from Biscuit finds it's way through Impaler's defenses.

That's three minutes gone in the round.
Impaler keeping his hands up high there, blocking the jab from Biscuit.
Vladimir Impaler is looking to keep the fight on the feet at all costs.
Impaler looks to land a left hand but Biscuit moved out of range nicely.
Biscuit lands a right hook to the body.
Biscuit throws out a token jab with nothing on it.
Impaler throws out a loose jab but Biscuit uses good head movement to avoid it.
Biscuit drops down looking for a counter takedown but Impaler sprawls and moves away.
Biscuit takes a swing at Impaler's ribcage but misses.
Impaler throws a lazy head kick
and Biscuit connects with a straight left hand counter down the middle.
Impaler misses the shot to the body.
It really doesn't seem like the step up in weight is hurting Biscuit here at all. He's more than holding his own against the bigger man.

Biscuit scores with a takedown into Impaler's guard.
Biscuit loading up with the ground and pound but he's missing more than he's landing in this flurry.
Biscuit is really dominating this fight. Is there anything that Impaler can do to turn this around?

That's four minutes gone in the round.
Biscuit trying to control the position from guard on top but Impaler is wriggling around, looking for whatever he can.
Biscuit throws an elbow that misses. Impaler uses the momentum to reverse the position. He's now in Biscuit's guard. Nice move by Impaler!

Biscuit wants to sweep but no luck.
Biscuit is looking to sweep but instead, Impaler has passed into half guard.
Biscuit desperately trying to maintain half guard.
Impaler tries to stand but his hand is stuck under Biscuit.
The fans in attendance giving it up for the two fighters, who have really let it all hang out in the last minute or so!
Biscuit is looking to regain full guard. Not this time though.
Impaler trying to control the pace.
And that’s the end of the round – the fighters go back to their corners.

That was a close second round but I would say that Schmorgen Biscuit will probably get the nod.
Both fighters have cut men working on them during the interval.
Well, the break between rounds is over. Let's get back to the scrappin! This is the final round!

Biscuit misses with a straight right.
Impaler let fly with a counter punch to the body but it didn't land.
Impaler uses good footwork to avoid the strikes from Biscuit.
Impaler takes a swing at Biscuit's ribcage but misses.
Biscuit checks the leg kick.
Biscuit thows a left - swing and a miss!
Biscuit rushes in with a sloppy looking punch
and Impaler cracks him with a counter punch right on the button.
Biscuit misses with a looping left.
A little jabbing left from Impaler on the counter but it doesn't find it's target.
Biscuit throws out a loose jab but Impaler uses good head movement to avoid it.
We've had a slow start to the round here - hopefully the action picks up.
Biscuit throws an off balance right hand
and Impaler connects with a straight left hand counter down the middle.
Biscuit looks to score with a jab to the body but Impaler is just out of range.
Good exchange - Impaler coming out on top.

Schmorgen Biscuit's cut is getting worse.

That's one minute gone in the round.
Biscuit misses with a right hand
and Impaler scores with a counter punch that sends Biscuit to the canvas! Impaler smells blood - he's punishing Biscuit with more strikes and the ref has stopped it! Biscuit has no idea where he is - he's tackled the ref... oh dear, poor guy, the crowd is in hysterics!

Ladies and gentlemen, after 1:08 of round 3, we have a winner by way of TKO (Strikes). Vladimir Impaler!
Vladimir Impaler took to the microphone after his victory and thanked his sponsors, Sportivité for their support in the buildup to the fight.