PBP Commentary

Coming up we have a super heavyweight MMA rules bout between Malcom McWeeny (ranked 0 p4p, 0 weight class) and Butt Piracy (ranked 0 p4p, 0 weight class). Piracy has chosen I Like Big Butts as his entrance music. Both fighters really staring each other down here, as Butt Piracy enters the cage!

McWeeny
vs
Piracy

150 cm
27
300 lbs
14 - 4 - 0

210 cm
24
300 lbs
5 - 0 - 0

Good wrestling
Excellent MT
Cardio machine

Good wrestler
Excellent MT
Granite chin

Blitzkrieg Formula 5000 Cardio
Charlie Wang's Nutrition and 95 % Laundry

Charlie Wang's Nutrition and 95 % Laundry

Ladies and gentlemen. This fight is 5 rounds, for the super heavyweight championship of the world!
Introducing the champion to my left, fighting out of the red corner.
With a record of 14 - 4 - 0, fighting out of Los Angeles, Malcom McWeeny!
And introducing the challenger to my right, fighting out of the blue corner.
With a record of 5 - 0 - 0, fighting out of Los Angeles, Butt Piracy!
The judges for this bout are Timothy Bukovac, Don Winkell and .

The bell rings for round one and we are underway!
Piracy uses good head movement to avoid the hook from McWeeny.
McWeeny throws a feint and then finishes with a kick to the body.
Piracy avoids a low kick by using good footwork.
A nice leg kick lands there from McWeeny.

Piracy moves into the clinch.
Piracy tried to land a shot to the body but connects with McWeeny's elbow.
A nice right hand lands inside from McWeeny.
McWeeny works on Piracy's body with a couple of short punches.
Wooooo! Give it up for these two warriors! They are putting on a show!
McWeeny throws a punch but it's blocked by Piracy.
Piracy tries to land a knee to the body but he is off balance and McWeeny avoids it.
McWeeny struggles to land a body shot inside as Piracy controls his hands.

Piracy breaks the clinch and we return to the middle of the mat.

McWeeny moves into range and clinches up with Piracy.
Piracy misses the knee to the body. Nice hip positioning from McWeeny.
Piracy missing with knees to the body.
McWeeny struggles to land a body shot inside as Piracy controls his hands.
Piracy misses with a short punch on the inside.
Piracy tries to jump guard but he falls flat on his backside. McWeeny smiles and moves away.

McWeeny drives through and clinches with Piracy against the cage.

That's one minute gone in the round.
McWeeny lands a shoulder strike that jolts his opponent's head backwards.

It looks like Butt Piracy has been cut.
Piracy misses with a punch on the inside.
Piracy tries a shoulder strike but it doesn't do any damage.
Piracy can't find room to land a body shot as McWeeny controls the action.
McWeeny throws a hook to the body. More of an arm punch but it's all scoring with the judges.
Piracy looks gassed!
A short left from McWeeny.
This has been an exciting period of action!
McWeeny lands a short shot on the inside that snaps the head of Piracy backwards.
A shot in the inside from McWeeny.
A short right from McWeeny.
McWeeny lands with a good tight uppercut to the head.
McWeeny lands a left hand.
An uppercut to the body lands inside from McWeeny.
McWeeny lands with a short head shot on the inside.
Still in the clinch, McWeeny scores with a nice short uppercut.
A short right from McWeeny on the inside.
McWeeny lands with a right to the head.
McWeeny throws a hook to the body. More of an arm punch but it's all scoring with the judges.
McWeeny lands a nice looking hook to the body, against the cage.
McWeeny lands with a left to the head.
Nice body punch from McWeeny - that landed with a thud.

That's two minutes gone in the round.
A body shot lands from McWeeny.
McWeeny lands a nice uppercut.
McWeeny stalling against the cage.
McWeeny digs a right hand into Piracy's ribs. Those have got to be taking their toll on Piracy's gas tank.
McWeeny makes some space for himself and lands an uppercut.
McWeeny misses with a shot to the kidneys.
McWeeny lands a hook that snaps the head of Piracy backwards.
McWeeny is stalling here.
Piracy tries to break the clinch but McWeeny is controlling the position.
McWeeny makes some space for himself and lands an uppercut.
McWeeny goes for a body shot but it's blocked.
McWeeny takes an elbow to the temple.
Piracy misses with some punches.
McWeeny slows down the pace here.
A right handed body shot lands from McWeeny.

That's three minutes gone in the round.
With the fighters up against the cage, Piracy throws an elbow but misses.
Piracy tries to land a shot to the body but it's blocked.
McWeeny working some nice short punches in the clinch.

That has opened up Butt Piracy's cut even more.
A quick uppercut on the inside from McWeeny.
Piracy's head jolts backwards as he takes an uppercut right on the button!
McWeeny is leaning against Piracy and scores with a nice uppercut to the body.
McWeeny misses with a shot to the kidneys.
McWeeny lands a shot to the body.
This is a great period of action - very entertaining stuff!
McWeeny lands a hook to the body. It's hard to tell if that hurt Piracy or not.
McWeeny lands a shot to the body.
Nice body punch from McWeeny.
Good body shot from McWeeny.
McWeeny is stalling here.
McWeeny lands with a short head shot on the inside.
McWeeny lands a body punch in the clinch.
McWeeny lands a nice looking hook to the body, against the cage.
McWeeny slows down the pace here.
McWeeny tries to work over Piracy's body with a swooping hook but it only glances the target.

That's four minutes gone in the round.
Piracy misses the knee to the body. Nice hip positioning from McWeeny.
McWeeny scores with a hook to the body.
McWeeny digs a right hand into Piracy's ribs. Those have got to be taking their toll on Piracy's gas tank.
McWeeny working some nice short punches in the clinch.
Nice body punch from McWeeny.
McWeeny throws a blind hook that connects with the side of Piracys head.
The pace really dropping off here, momentarily.
McWeeny lands with a right to the head.

The cut above Butt Piracy's eye is starting to cause him problems now.
McWeeny stalls.
McWeeny scores with a hook to the body.
The crowd are going absolutely nuts as the round comes to an end - what a fantastic round of action!
A right hook to the body lands for McWeeny.
McWeeny avoiding damage.
McWeeny misses with a hook to the ribs.
And that’s the end of the round – the fighters go back to their corners.

Malcom McWeeny dominated that round.
The cut man is working on Butt Piracy's cut.
The fighters' corners scream their final instructions, as the referee calls time. Here we go, back to the action!

Piracy takes a body punch but keeps moving.
McWeeny misses with the body kick
and Piracy counters with a crisp hook to the side of the head.

McWeeny darts in and clinches Piracy up against the cage.
McWeeny has a couple of punches blocked by Piracy.
Piracy tries a body shot but McWeeny blocks it.
A battle for position here, against the cage.
Piracy blocks a body shot from McWeeny.
McWeeny is really dominating this fight. Is there anything that Piracy can do to turn this around?
McWeeny misses with a hook to the ribs.
McWeeny lands a left hand.
Piracy goes for a body shot but it's blocked.
A short uppercut from McWeeny.
Piracy throws an elbow that misses.
McWeeny taking a breather.
The crowd are loving this. Great action here.
McWeeny lands with a short head shot on the inside.
A short right from McWeeny on the inside.
An uppercut on the inside fails to land for McWeeny.
A shot in the inside from McWeeny.
Piracy is breathing heavily.
McWeeny lands with a short shot to the head.

That's one minute gone in the round.
McWeeny lands with a short punch from the clinch.
McWeeny swings away with an uppercut that misses.
McWeeny lands a body punch.
Nice body punch from McWeeny.
McWeeny blocks a punch to the side of the head.
McWeeny lands a body shot in the clinch.
The fans in attendance giving it up for the two fighters, who have really let it all hang out in the last minute or so!
McWeeny tries a body shot but Piracy blocks it.
McWeeny blocks the elbow strike.
McWeeny lands an uppercut.
McWeeny is leaning against Piracy and scores with a nice uppercut to the body.
McWeeny scores with a shot to the side of Piracy's head.
McWeeny lands with a light punch inside.
Piracy looks to throw an elbow but misses.
A hook to the body from McWeeny.

McWeeny drops Piracy onto one knee with a big uppercut from the clinch! Piracy is propped up by the cage and works his way back to his feet!

Piracy is rocked!
McWeeny lands an uppercut in the clinch that drops Piracy to his knees! McWeeny keeps firing more shots against his stricken opponent and the referee jumps in to save him!

Ladies and gentlemen, after 1:58 of round 2, we have a winner by way of TKO (Strikes). Malcom McWeeny!
Malcom McWeeny retains his super heavyweight title!